singer78

Kayla,
"That's" why I'm here---to help put that beautiful smile back on your face.
You've helped me more than you know, too.... even through all your trials & tribulations.
We 'so' need one another, don't we?

So, ...purchasing your Michael Jackson mask got you in trouble? I've been washing my hands with Purell so much, they're beginning to look like lobster claws. I think that stuff works, though....I know our immune systems have taken a beating, and you just can't be too careful--especially this time of year. Did you get a flu shot? No...I bet not, now that I think about what you're going through. I'm getting one (God-willing) Thursday. I put it off, until I got a little further away from treatment.

I'm still so anticipatory of my scan. -- It's kind of like the "elephant in the living room." It's always there, even though I'm blocking it out. I'm trying the "I'm fine" route---and I succeed most of the time...but, occasionally there's that little devil that sits on my other shoulder, going "what if this?...& what if that???" I suppose for the next 5 years or so, we'll have to get used to that little devil, every now & then. Someone posted on here, not too long ago, and said they actually forgot all about it (The Big C) after about 5 years being "clean." I SO pray that's us.

Don't be so hard on yourself. What you're going through would be hard for anyone.
You know, you can explain chemo over & over to someone that's never had it...yet, it's so hard to explain the full impact it has on one's body. I explained it to my sister, as it being like an "electrical-shock" feeling (during infusion) that doesn't subside for days. I think it was my last bag of ABVD..... Yuck. I feel so bad you're still in the throws of it...and I can only imagine how disheartening it is without your family. Why God does these things, we'll never know. Just hang in there---you know it will get better. Fight, fight, fight....Don't let this BEAST get you down. Punch that sucker right in the kisser!!!!There's sunnier days ahead.

I didn't realize how important a positive attitude was, until the last few months.
It's essential for our well-being. Since lightening my mood (with med's) I don't dread waking up in the morning. I used to wake up & pull the covers over my head and say, "Oh no....can I do this???" Now, I STILL pull the covers over my head, but I say, "I CAN do this." By the way---aren't you taking something to help your psyche, too?
I'm a firm believer, now of taking them, when necessary. I was afraid of them for so many years-- I don't know why. Probably heard too many horror stories. Of course, it took me awhile to find the right combo. Zoloft made me mean. The Celexa is working much better for me.

I'm not so sure I'll get to play in the snow---it's rather cold, although a nice, brisk walk might be in order.

I'm so glad you posted. Hope your tea & your comforter helps a little.
love, S.