Sorry to hear your period hasn't shown up yet Andrea - maybe it won't come and maybe you are close to being done w/ it? But I know how it feels to wait for it - that's how mine used to be. Then I'd finally get it and not even two weeks later I'd get it again. I kept saying that my ovaries were taking turns
You and RMC are right though - I really think I need some therapy here. I'm going about this all wrong - doing it the addict's way - if someone won't give me something, I'll buy it off the streets - WRONG thinking. Thinking very WRONG lately - all this anxiety! Here I am overly worried about plans tonight - fireworks or movies - who the hell cares!? It shouldn't be a big deal but I am making a mountain out of it. Driving the hubby nuts. Well in my mind it's a big deal because it involves coordination with the kids, which ones want to do what and go where - different ages so different movie restrictions. See, off to my bad thinking and worrying again! I worry myself into not wanting to go. Right now, I'd rather sit at home in the dark smoking my cigarettes with calming music in the background.
So I did find a therapist that will take a copay the the rest will be put on a sliding scale - one problem - major waiting list. She is mailing me a form anyway so I'll fill it out and wait my turn I guess. Having it sent to me at work - hubby doesn't want me seeing a therapist and I am not going to tell him.
He thinks I should just read more of the Big Book which I've tried and hasn't helped. This isn't all from my past addictions like he thinks. This is a physical thing with me and i've never had any of this before and I've been clean a while now. Plus it all started with my periods getting out of whack and went down hill from there.
Oh a strange thing happened to me this afternoon. It was my stomach - I only had 1/2 of a turkey sandwich. About an hour after I ate it, it felt like there was a little man in my stomach (not running around with a lit match this time) but flipping a huge pancake over. It was a total spasm - anyone ever have that? It didn't hurt or anything - just very weird!
Thanks for listening to my rambles.