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Old 05-05-2005, 08:11 AM  
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Brenda East HB User
Will I ever feel normal again?

I am 52 years old. For the last 8 or 9 years of my life I have not felt like a normal healthy person. I AM TIRED OF FEELING THIS WAY. When one thing gets better or goes away, something else just pops up to deal with and make you feel terrible. Can anyone out there honestly say that they have been through this "change of life" deal and feel normal again? When will all of this end? I have had almost every symptom mentioned on this board and could probably add a few. My life is at a standstill, and not because I want it to be, but because I honestly DON'T FEEL like doing anything. Any of you ladies out there feel mad sometimes like I do today?

I am so upset this morning and not feeling good. Forgive me for venting.

 
Old 05-05-2005, 08:35 AM  
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twanger HB User
Re: Will I ever feel normal again?

I know EXACTLY how you feel. I am going through the same thing. The past two years have been hell. I am 58 and didn't start to have all 35 symptoms until two years ago when my periods stopped.

Now, even though I still do not have the periods, I still rotate through the symptoms to a lesser degree. Now I am having breast tenderness/swelling like I used to have when I had periods.

A month ago, it was irritable bladder. A month before that, it was muscle/joint aches and pains. So much so that I couldn't walk at times. Now, I am walking but hurting else where.

Does this ever stop?

 
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Old 05-05-2005, 09:26 AM  
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rmc12 HB User
Re: Will I ever feel normal again?

Brenda (and Twanger),

I could have written your post myself Brenda and as Twanger said I am right there with you!! I am 51 , still getting periods (don't know if you are or not, Brenda), but PMS is so much longer now, like all thru the month. My gyn said that Peri is like a long PMS. By PMS I mean all the symptoms I had with PMS b before I was in peri in additioin to a myriad of ever changing other symtpoms that I have had now in peri.

I first started noticing my periods were changing in my mid 40s but it was not bothersome, just came earlier and was shorter when it came. No big deal. I also used to get a sinus headache right before in my late 40s that I complained about at the time...now I wish that was all I got!!

Then last year I started earlier in the year to get more intestinal issues which are more emphasized in peri, and more aches and pains also separate from the intestinal stuff. And anxiety big time, about it all. It was like that from late feb, all of March and on and off thru May of last year and then it seemed to be where my hormones must have been more stable as the symptoms decreased for a good 8 to 9 months.

They reared their ugly heads again this year in March and I am still dealing on and off with them. It is a constant effort to keep anxiety at bay about the symptoms and I too don't feel like ME and want to. I am tired of it also!!

Are you taking anything thru this time? I know a lot of women on here (who I am sure will post) take a variety of different supplements. I am taking a multivitamin, Vit. B complex, Calcium and also Estroven , an over the counter herbal /vitamin supplement. It seemed to help more last year though. Exercise seems to help me but trying to get energy to do it is a tough thing I know. I have to push myself at times and last year I just could not when symptoms were at their height. I also take Xanax for anxiety as needed. I did that more last year when I was dealing with all of it but now do it now and then.

A big help for me is coming to this board and reading about women who have made it thru this time with the same symptoms and problems and are now better but they understand what we are going thru and also hearing from women who are going thru the same things now as we are and are trying to cope too. It all makes one feel that they are not alone

Don't worry about venting...everyone needs to do that and we are all here to listen and share.

Your post helped me as I realize my frustrations this morning thru all this are not just mine but I am reminded it is normal for us to feel this way and it is just hormones. I know that doesn't erase how bad we feel at times though, believe me.

Hang in there,

rmc

 
Old 05-06-2005, 04:58 AM  
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Brenda East HB User
Re: Will I ever feel normal again?

Thanks rmc12 and Twanger,
I am afraid I am not very good at taking pills, although I have tried Estroven, New phase and other OTC stuff. They helped for a short period of time. I have heard that if you take medications to help with the symptoms, that they only delay the menopausal process and once you stop taking them, you will still get all the symptoms, so I have tried to get through this without them hoping that someday it will all be over.

I have not have a period since Aug 04. I was thrilled about that thinking that I was getting closer to the end, and although the hot flashes have gotten a lot better, I still get this very warm feeling at least 2 or 3 times a day. I am more than happy to deal with this rather than the hot flashes once every hour alll day. Sleeping was impossible during that time. Some of the things that I have dealt with over the last years that have disappeared FOR NOW are: irregular periods since 45, heavy/clotting periods that scared me to death, breast so sore I couldn't touch them, depression, anger, just plain mean, severe hot flashes, night sweats, cold chills, no appetite, thinning hair, stiffness, constipation, there were so many.

Now my skin is so dry I scratch 24/7. I have tried everything, Eucerin, Gold Bond, Aveeno, but nothing works. I also have what is known as Melasma (brown/greyish spots on my cheeks) on my face. It is believed to be some sort of hormonal imbalance as well. Any one heard or have this? I have electric shocks under the skin all the time. My feet and hands get so hot sometimes, I actually have to put them in cold water to relief the burning feeling. Just recently added Acid Reflux. What a wonderful life!

I had the anxiety and depression in the early years of this mess. Crying, anger, moody, nothing was right, but couldn't figure out what was wrong. It is better now and right now most of my drama is physical. Like I said in my other post, get rid of one and another one pops up. What is this? One hormone balancing at a time or something.

You know I have no idea if my mother went through any of this or not, I was reared in an old-fashioned environment where things like this was never talked about. So if she did, she probably didn't know what she was going through.

Thanks again for posting your reply. It sure does help me to feel better.

 
Old 05-06-2005, 09:10 AM  
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armadillo pie HB User
Re: Will I ever feel normal again?

Hi- I can totally connect to what you are going through. I to have been in peri for awhile and this year it had gottten worse. I think for me the worse is the lack of energy, sadness, and feelings of isolation that had really taken me over. I find I could easly slip into this sadness and stay there- it is kind of addictive. Trying to move and get out of it is the most difficult thing I could do. It has even taken over the physical symptoms and they are not so great either.
But it also has motivated me to seek help. I am not an advocate of antidepressents. That is only my personal view. Having tried them a while ago, and losing all feelings ( I was numb- could not even cry- that scared me- afterall I did want some some emotions). Also my gyno, a woman, is very traditional and she only wants to give me synthetic this or that, which I do not feel good about.
So I am in accupuncture and I really have to say it is amazing. It is a traditional form of medicine much older and more complex then ours. It does not treat the symptoms, which I think western med does, but really gets to the root.
I go weekly and my life has changed. I feel much more up and energized, most of the physical symptoms are gone or lessened ( No more breast tenderness, never any hot flashes). I feel good about taking care of myself this way and I feel my body healing and doing it's natural thing without few side effects. I am given herbs to drink, which have really helped. They are the Chinese version of medicine. My accupunturist is a woman, who was a gyno in China, so she is extremely knowledgable. She reads my body like a book and very acqurate. It is not only about the physical symptoms but the emotions we hold in out body and releasing them.
I highly recommend it for those of you who are open to it.
I am not where I want to be yet- but at least now I see an end to this insanity of perimenopause.

 
Old 05-07-2005, 05:07 AM  
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JinL HB UserJinL HB User
Re: Will I ever feel normal again?

read Suzzane Summers book, "The Sexy Years". It covers it all & how to fix it.

 
Old 05-07-2005, 07:39 AM  
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twanger HB User
Re: Will I ever feel normal again?

I posted earlier. I am menopausal and have not had a period for almost two years. Things were improving but these past two days have been hell again. Swollen breasts, crying, and depression along with the anxiety.

I wonder how long does this last. My mother is gone and I don't know how many years after one's last period I am still going to experience these. It seems as if I still cycle
(without a period). I wonder if that is possible.

Maybe someone knows and can help. I hope so.

 
Old 05-08-2005, 10:17 PM  
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Kaco HB User
Re: Will I ever feel normal again?

Yes, you will feel normal again, but the timing is different for everyone. I went into Menopause around 40, just after having a surprise baby at 37. My mood swings were terrible and, the doctor put me on birth control to straighten out my periods. this was a blessing as they regulated everything including my moods. I was practically symptom free. Then he stopped prescribing them, and I floundered for about 2 years. Then he started me on prem-pro(low dosage). By the time I was about 45 my periods had stopped completly; I liked that part. During the time I took nothing the night sweats were terrible, and my hair would be damp upon awakening, also I had a sweat line on my lip at all times. The prem-Pro stopped all that and my disposition improved a good bit. I am now 59 and have to give up the Prem-pro due to high blood pressure which just developed. My worry is only the weight gain I know I will get when I give up the harmones. As for the facial hair and the few other things which are associated with this, there is waxing and moisture creams help with dry complection. Too, I use a lotion the Dr. prescribed for all over dry skin, called Lachydrin. It works wonders for the heels and elbows, etc.

 
Old 05-09-2005, 03:27 PM  
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Hopefully HB User
Re: Will I ever feel normal again?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaco
Yes, you will feel normal again, but the timing is different for everyone. I went into Menopause around 40, just after having a surprise baby at 37. My mood swings were terrible and, the doctor put me on birth control to straighten out my periods. this was a blessing as they regulated everything including my moods. I was practically symptom free. Then he stopped prescribing them, and I floundered for about 2 years. Then he started me on prem-pro(low dosage). By the time I was about 45 my periods had stopped completly; I liked that part. During the time I took nothing the night sweats were terrible, and my hair would be damp upon awakening, also I had a sweat line on my lip at all times. The prem-Pro stopped all that and my disposition improved a good bit. I am now 59 and have to give up the Prem-pro due to high blood pressure which just developed. My worry is only the weight gain I know I will get when I give up the harmones. As for the facial hair and the few other things which are associated with this, there is waxing and moisture creams help with dry complection. Too, I use a lotion the Dr. prescribed for all over dry skin, called Lachydrin. It works wonders for the heels and elbows, etc.
Kaco, which brand of bcp helped you to feel almost totally symptom free, and did you take it continuously?

 
Old 05-09-2005, 09:43 PM  
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Re: Will I ever feel normal again?

Norlestrin, and I think it was around two years that I took it. I felt great and was surprised that the Dr. would do a trade off on the Prem-pro. Both are similar in what they do so I had a hard time accepting that one was better than the other. Menopause is a trying time to get through, but with first the BC pills, then the Prem-pro, I did it. It is not that you gain extra weight, but that what you have is redistributed and your once nice figure is a bit lumpy looking. This can make you go up a size or so. I didn't have this shifting of weight with the BC pills, but it started immediately with the Prem-pro. The Dr. acted as if I was a bit foolish to complain about this weight shift, but it really bothered me at the time. The night sweats are a memory now but I can still remember how bad they were. Your hair will thin out a bit, but it does come back in time.

 
Old 05-10-2005, 08:50 AM  
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rmc12 HB User
Re: Will I ever feel normal again?

Twanger,

How are you doing? I felt bad for you to read that after not having your period in two years you were experiencing bothersome symptoms again. I know it is frustrating enough when we are in peri to have symptoms crop up again when they have been gone for a bit, but it has to be very frustrating to have things come back once you are out of this phase.

The anxiety is so hard to deal with and I empathize with you. I have a friend who does not have hers anymore and still cycles at times like you are talking about, getting symptoms but no period.

Anyway, I know this post doesn't help much as far as suggestions, but just wanted you to know I was thinking of you and to hang in there.

Take care,

rmc

 
Old 05-10-2005, 09:54 AM  
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twanger HB User
Re: Will I ever feel normal again?

Hi rmc. Thank you for your thoughts. I know that I will feel better some time because I see other older women who are having a great time. I read about a 95 year old women that still goes to the casino every week. She drives herself.

How long has your friend been cycling through the symptoms? I was glad to hear that because I thought I was the only one.

Thank you for your response and I know that we all will get to the peace that we want and have a great time. Then we can help the newbies who come here.

 
Old 05-10-2005, 02:15 PM  
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JinL HB UserJinL HB User
Re: Will I ever feel normal again?

If you really want to help yourself read "The Sexy Years"

 
Old 05-11-2005, 11:38 AM  
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rmc12 HB User
Re: Will I ever feel normal again?

Hi Twanger,

How are you doing this week?

You asked about my friend...she has not had a period in a year, yet still around the time of the month she would get her period she will sometimes feel that cycling feeling. For her it is headaches and hot flashes and also just feeling that pre period anxiousness , not about anything in particular.

I know what you mean about seeing older women having a great time. I have an aunt who is in her 70s and is very youthful and doing great. Also in my Jazzercize class I see people around me that are obviously older and are full of energy and are doing good...and obviously have been thru this stage and "made it". So there is hope!! : )

Take care,

rmc

 
Old 05-11-2005, 12:58 PM  
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twanger HB User
Re: Will I ever feel normal again?

Thanks for asking. I am doing better this week. Last week was bad. It was almost like PMS all over again.

Overall, I have much more energy than I did last year at this time. If I could just get rid of this anxiety, especially about my health, and a few of the symptoms that sneak back in from time to time, I would be wonderful.

Oh well, maybe in time....

 
 

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