I am 54 year old female. I hadn't been sexually active with a man in almost 3 years. My boyfriend is 49. He at first couldn't ejaculate at all the first several times. He almost gave up, and took his doctors advise to try viagra. I encouraged him for us to give this alittle more time since we were new lovers, and both hadn't had intercourse with a lover for multiple years. He does ejaculate now, but, usually takes about 45 minutes on the average. I get frustrated, because my lubrication isn't usually effective that long, and he comments on wondering why sometimes I have enough,and other times not. We have used saliva, and some grocery store bought lubricants that have helped. But, it is distracting to me, to stop several, or more times to add more lubricant. I feel my feminine ego abit threatened. I feel it isn't my fault. If he came within 20 minutes or less, which I think is average I wouldn't be having this problem. He really wears me out. I do stimulate him both manually, and orally in foreplay. So, it's not like I am not stimulating him enough. Now, I just read on another website, that a woman in menopause can take up to 45 mins to properly lubricate. That seems like a very long time to wait for intercourse to me. I don't want to hurt his ego, I don't think my complaining about taking to long will help any, so I haven't. I'd say we have foreplay about 15 minutes on the average, isn't that usually enough for a woman to lubricate enough. Isn't 45 mins longer than average? Any suggestions?