Post Trauma Stress Disorder - Mental Health Message Board

SandraM · 12-11-2004, 07:01 PM

Its hard when people have to deal with so much trauma as I have myself over many years. I have come a long way. But I know I have a long way to go yet too. My father only cared about his bottle, and it was my mother that was my abuser. I moved out when I was 16. I knew I didn't have a choice. I knew it was my survival. I know I still carry a lot of hatred and anger towards my parents. I try and get my anger out but I know I still have a lot inside of me yet. My friend and I moved same time and moved in together till we each got jobs about 3 years later. She passed away from liver disease when she was only 24, and I will miss her always. She was the only close friend I ever had. It was so devasting for me when she died. I was only 11 when my mother's father comitted suicide. I did marry when I was 31 only to have a bad relationship with him. He as well was a heavy drinker. Plus he was a terrible spender and almost left me bankrupt. He also comitted suicide when I told him to move out as I had enough of his crap. Its been 14 years since he passed, and I am still trying to climb out of that financial mess. I also have major health problems which sure has taken its toll on me in many ways. I try and keep my humour but some days it isn't easy. I could go on and on here but I will leave it at this.
I try and read a lot of self help books which have helped some. But as I said I still have a long ways to go yet.
Has anyone else ever had a lot of tragedy in their lives, if so how do you deal with it?

mudhound · 12-19-2004, 06:43 PM

those issues would do it.

hillaryb · 12-23-2004, 07:20 PM

Im only 28 but Ive had my share of crappy things happen. My mother even told me once that in my 16 years (this was 12 years ago) I had been through more than she ever had (she was in her 40's). I find that you tend to go between constantly dreading the next horrible thing that is coming, and trying not to think about it. I will say, though that feeling still hits me at times, right now I feel strong. Most things people fear I have already dealt with, and I try to bear in mind that either I gain strength from all this, or let it destroy me. I feel pretty optimistic right now, and I feel strong, as opposed to traumatized. I guess I have to be strong, though, for my kids. No matter what we go through, they need me , and I cant give in to fear or sadness, though many nights i lay down and feel both pretty strongly. I usually feel better in the morning.