Robb235

Thanks in advance to those who read my post.

About two years or so ago I realized that I suffered from depression, which started I think when I was 11 or 12. Last year I realized that I also have some form of anxiety which I can remember having as far back as middle school, but I at the time I never understood what it was. I'm an 18 year old senior in high school and I thought I could try and do something about it next year when I go to college. My dad is a physician, but for some reason I don't want to tell him of my problems. Some of that I'm sure stems from being the near-perfect child, always having high grades and playing sports, soccer and football for my high school.

My anxiety is what bothers me the most. It affects me in certain social situations and being around certain females. It just grips me and I feel so self-concious about my breathing, where my eyes are focused, what am I doing, what am I gunna say, what am I looking at, what am I going to do next, and I'm no longer comfortable. I become quiet and non-sociable and I just seem to withdraw as I try to conceal my anxiety from everybody else. Sometimes I show physical signs of my anxiety, sweaty palms, sometimes my face will blush, and when it's real bad my hands will tremble slightly. It's a terrible feeling and it severly inhibits my ability to get into a relationship. I've tried calming myself down when my anxiety comes around, but nothing I do really seems to work and I think I need to see a professional to help me get rid of it.

But I don't want my dad to be the professional. I can't really explain why, but I don't want my parents or anyone close to me knowing about what I go through. I know that's probably an unhealthy impulse that I have. I think I'm going to schedule an appointment with a doctor in a nearby city to see if I can't get on the road to recovering from this hell. What kind of doctor do I set an appointment with, a psychiatrist or a regular family practioner or what? How would an appointment like this cost? I know my parents have health insurance for me, but I have no idea what it covers and I'm sure my parents would wonder why I am visiting the doctor, so I'll just pay for it myself. And what do I tell the doctor once I'm there? All I need to tell him is that I'm anxious and depressed?