Dating advice for someone with mental illness - Mental Health Message Board

freedom25 · 12-18-2006, 06:01 PM

I have been diagnosed with psychosis about 7 years ago. Since my recovery around that same time, everything has been going fine as long as I take my medication and manage my stress.

I have had a bad experience in the past dating someone. The relationship was moving too fast and since it was my first dating experience, I found myself worying about the relationship to the point where I felt very stressed. I eventually had to back out of the relationship and quit my job since it was affecting my health and I had trouble functionning.

Since then, I haven't had any other relationships fearing this might happen again.

Now in my mid twenties. I want to go back dating and I am trying to figure out what I can do or what can I avoid this time without reapeating that same story.

Is it normal to feel stress when the relationship if moving really fast ? Or is this just part of dating ?

Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks to anyone who replies in advance.

trg247 · 12-18-2006, 07:58 PM

Relationships can be stressfull at times but that is normal. I find the whole process of dating stressfull so I tend not to do it or did it, I have been married for three years. If your going to fast tell her that you need to slow up a bit, get to know one each other before going all out.

trg247

TzuMom · 01-20-2007, 11:45 PM

You may also want to try No Longer Lonely
[url]http://www.nolongerlonely.com/[/url]
It is a dating service for adults with mental illness. This could be a good way for you to get back out in the dating scene as it removes any anxiety that one might feel about disclosing their disorder to a potential date.
Also please realize that nobody is perfect. We all have something about us that we are unhappy with, embarassed about, etc. What that is varies from person to person. And how we treat it will have an impact on how others perceive it. For example, I have a close friend who is HIV+. He disclosed this shortly after we met, but he treated it like it was no big deal, like the color of his eyes or his age. As a result, I have not made a big deal about it. When disclosing your disorder to people you don't make it a big deal, they will likely also not make a big deal of it.
It can be beneficial for people close to you whom you trust to know about your disorder. They can keep an eye on you and help you manage stress.
The most important part of dating is to do things when you are comfortable with them. If things are moving too quickly, slow it down. If the guy doesn't want to slow down, then he is not the guy for you.