New and looking for answers. - Mental Health Message Board

justlikeme13 · 07-16-2008, 11:14 AM

Hi there. I'm a mid twenties female dealing with some anxiety/depression issues. I was previously thought to possibly have BPD and have a family history of panic disorders and depression. Just over a year ago I got out of counseling when I finally overcame the depression from my divorce. My therapist released me because I was doing great and had a great outlook for my future. I am in a wonderful relationship with a great guy. We have our fights like everyone does but we make sure to work them out. I have a great job that I love. My home life is pretty good too.

So why am I freaking out all the time? I've been having panic attacks recently over little dumb things that normally wouldn't upset me all that much. I'm afraid of my boyfriend splitting up with me all the time. I misjudge everything people tell me. I feel empty inside alot. I can't take a compliment to heart. I'm falling apart here. The last time I felt this way was when i was potentially diagnosed with BPD (a traumatic event brought it on at the time and I had to go on medication to be able to function). I just want to know whats going on and how I can fix it. This is just not me. I've always been described as a happy-go-lucky person. Now I feel like I'm losing my mind. Thanks ahead of time to anyone who replies.

tracyd66 · 07-18-2008, 02:09 PM

hi justlikeme13 i really felt for you reading your message, i also suffer from panic attacks reguarly, and always wonder why, i believe that worry can bring on attacks,u say u worry about your boyfriend splitting up with you, have you ever asked yourself why u think that alot? i think that maybe you havent had much luck with relationships and this is why you are like you are, financial problems actually anything that worrys you wont help. i hope you can find peace and a ending to this, best wishes.... tracyd66

justlikeme13 · 07-21-2008, 03:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tracyd66

hi justlikeme13 i really felt for you reading your message, i also suffer from panic attacks reguarly, and always wonder why, i believe that worry can bring on attacks,u say u worry about your boyfriend splitting up with you, have you ever asked yourself why u think that alot? i think that maybe you havent had much luck with relationships and this is why you are like you are, financial problems actually anything that worrys you wont help. i hope you can find peace and a ending to this, best wishes.... tracyd66

Thank you so much for answering! I was beginning to lose hope. As for the worrying about losing "Mike", the boyfriend, this has just become a recent thing. i've never been a jealous or worrisome person before when in a serious relationship. this is a totally new feeling for me, which makes it even worse. i think alot of it is the stress in my life is just too much. Mike and I have some issues with some family members of his that are making things really rough. it reminds me alot of my teenagers years when living at my dads when i never knew what was coming at me next (my dads an alcoholic and my step mom is just plain psychotic--could write a book on that one, but I'll refrain). I'm a control freak by nature (bad habit from a child of an alcoholic) and it just seems like once one thing gets out of hand it all goes anymore. All of this leads me to wonder if maybe I do have PTSD and all the "drama" going on with Micheals family is causing me to act out on everything i couldn't when i was younger. Am I making sense, or am I just plain crazy? The good news is I discussed it all with Mike and hes totally supportive. He calls me out when i'm being paranoid, reassures me when I most need it, and is understanding when i can't really explain whats got me so out of sorts. Now if i could only find a cure so I don't feel so out of whack. *sighs*

Thaks again, so much.

alyson5 · 07-28-2008, 01:51 PM

I too have the same kind of anxiety. I am 55 years old and came from a very traumatic childhood. Read alyson5 ( there's two of them and it will give you a back ground.) I have not been dignoised by anyone, I saw a therepist for the first time a few weeks ago. I took and on line test and it says I show symtons of PTDS. depression and generelized anxiety disorder. Everything is starting to fit together now. Different things trigger me to feel like that little child in tormoil.