I'm Going Crazy - Mental Health Message Board

alecaim · 03-30-2009, 10:38 PM

I feel like I'm going crazy, but I don't want to tell anyone. I am terrified of germs, sometimes going as far as washing my hands seventy times a day. I an obsessed with neatness and cleanliness, and cannot sit still until everything is clean and straight.
Sometimes, I'll do something, but it wont feel like I've done that. Such as shutting a door or turning of a light. I'll have to do it again, and again.
I'm constantly depressed because of my inability to get anything done. My schoolwork has declined from straight A's to straight D's and F's.
I don't know if it is related, but I also have to count things, but I don't remember the number so I count it very repetitively. There are countless small rituals that I have to perform and its ruining my life...
Someone please tell me what's wrong with me.

negot · 03-31-2009, 01:09 AM

You are not going crazy, but you have a clear case of OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder). You can start with reading a book on the subject. It is by Jeffrey Schwartz and is called "Brainlock- freeing yourself from obsessive compulsive behavior". There is help out there for your problem. Try to find a therapist who specializes in OCD. Your problem isn't unusual. I have a touch of it myself.
The counting is definitely part of OCD. People with OCD often feel compelled to count in a certain way to a certain number. Rituals are also very common. I had a friend with OCD and he had a lot of rituals, for example he felt compelled to touch each and every mailbox he saw on the streets. He also didn't trust that the mail worked properly so he payed every single bill in person. His many rituals left him no time to do much else but only do the rituals all day long.

AnnD · 03-31-2009, 01:37 AM

It is probably Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and if you can't get a handle on it yourself there are medications that can help but first you need to get a mental health workup. Many people have OCD at varying degrees. Some need medicine and some just need to see an OCD specialist to help. Good luck.

pendulum · 03-31-2009, 08:00 AM

Reading books on this subject, going into therapy, taking medicines, etc, may be necessary for you to find an answer. Honestly, I don't think there is something wrong with you, but you just feel out of sync with the world (reality) around you. You might argue that the world is wrong, not you. lol However, as a quick fix, I would suggest that you should start doing any physical activity, particularly outdoors and in Nature (walking in the woods, swimming, biking, etc). I am sure this will do you a lot of good, but if you have never done it before, start slowly and move on gradually.

rosequartz · 03-31-2009, 08:12 AM

you're not crazy, you have OCD.....check out the OCD board here, it will put your mind at ease.
One other thing to note.....OCD sufferers are usually highly intelligent!