Losing composure on the phone
After several weeks of getting the run-around from a doctor's office and a long list of people connected with our (less than perfect or in any way complete) health insurance, I completely lost it while talking to a customer representative. I occasionally have episodes of emotional incontinence, which fortunately leave quickly, but are draining, and sometimes exhausting to the point of collapse! I am "the strong one" in our family, being that our son has a developmental disability, and my husband finds everything about our health insurance mystifying and intimidating! I felt sorry for the rep, and apologized for my lack of composure, but I felt a flicker of compassion from him, and he said, "Try to be positive," (I could hear the noisy room he was in, with this huge bank of customer service reps, and felt sorry for the guy). This has happened before, and will probably happen again as I attempt to get services for our son. It seems ironic that as we need more medical care, the levels provided are less comprehensive. I feel that I am not only on the verge of a nervous breakdown, but am well advanced on the journey! I had to pull myself together, so I could provide the care for my son that he needed, and later recounted the saga to my husband, a comedy routine. If we can sometimes step back from our dark and anxious times, and see some humor (usually from a distance), it can carry some healing. Small acts of kindness can also be very healing. That is why I try hard to be kind all those who cross my path, and conscious of the immense responsibility we have as social creatures.