As stated in the description of me in my profile, i am an average 16 year old male, i have a pretty decent life, a decent job, loving and supportive family members, an average student with set goals i wish to achieve after i finish school.
But despite this i am very paranoid and insecure, as-well as being negative about everything (aka a pessimist).
So i turned to this forum in hope of some outside advice, i don't normally turn to others, usually i just sort things out myself and keep to myself.
i do have problems sleeping due to the fact that my tonsils and adenoids are extremely enlarge (i was born like this) and am hopefully getting them taken out in January.
If any further information is needed feel free to ask and i will answer to the best of my ability.
Hello blasto11. Is there anything in particular you're paranoid or insecure about?
I'm also a pessimist. I'm curious to hear how you put forth the effort to succeed if you're negative about everything. When I succeed with something I oftentimes rationalize it as not being a significant achievement or something to that effect. I think having a job and succeeding in school indicates you are at least positive enough to accomplish these things otherwise you probably won't have bothered trying.
What type of goals would you like to fulfill after school? And do you think you can accomplish these goals?
Im paranoid about everything, i think something has to go bad if something good happens.
And i dont really try at school or work, I only goto work because i need the money, and often think of quitting but dont because i'll get in trouble off my parents.
And to be honest i dont know why i bother going to school.
The only goal really significant is Getting a better job.
But similar to you i have got it stuck in my head that nothing i do is good enough, that i cant do anything right and will be a failure all my life.
I have no idea why i push forward though.
What type of job would you like to have? Would you have to get a college degree or some type of certification to get this job?
Unless you love your job and are passionate about it, I think in most cases people go to work primarily to collect a paycheck. I would advise against quitting your job. I say this not so much because of your parents, but because you'll probably need a good work history along with work references when applying for your better job. I think the same can be applied towards school. Even though school and work may seem pointless now, bear in mind employers oftentimes will judge how diligent and reliable of a person you are by looking at your employment and maybe your educational record.
Is there a career counselor in your school that you could talk to? If so I think that would be a good way to put the down the groundwork for how you would go about getting that better job.
There is a Careers advisor at my school, but it is the end of the year and i no longer have school until next year.
And you're right i do need pretty decent educational and job records to get a job in the IT Industry, this happens to be my only goal in life.
It may sound a bit abstract, but do you think striving to be happy in life is a worthwhile goal? What happens after you get a job in the IT industry? After you get the job you want do you think you'll set another goal or will you have achieved everything you wanted to do in life?
Being a pessimist could be related to any number of factors like personality type, overestimating your challenges while underestimating your ability to solve such problems, having unrealistic expectations, or preferring to avoid the risk of being disappointed.
I suggest talking to a psychologist or therapist to find out more why you think the way you do. You probably won't get answers to all the questions you have but you may learn what contributes to your negative thinking and how to change it.
