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Old 12-27-2011, 12:15 PM   #1
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paranoia and bipolar disorder

I'm a 22 year old female, and since I was little, I've been afraid of the dark. I was fine to sleep with a night light until a few years ago, when I started being afraid of the shadows, and afraid that someone was standing in them. When I sleep, I have to have all the lights on, but hear the sounds, and when I hear the regular noises at night, I think it's someone walking. I hate sleeping outside of the covers, because I'm afraid I'll feel something touch me. I cover up the faces of pictures and stuffed animals and posters and things, because I feel like they are watching me. I don't shower when I am alone in the house or apartment because I'm afraid someone will break in and kill me. I hate being alone at night, even when someone I know is in the house with me, because I'm afraid someone will break in, kill them, then kill me, and I won't hear it. I hate being in a room by myself with a closed door, because I'm afraid when I open the door to leave, I'll open the door and someone will be standing there. I don't get up and use the bathroom at night, because I'm afraid someone is going to be standing in the bathtub, hiding behind the shower curtain, and will jump out and kill me. I don't like to look in mirrors when I'm by myself, because I'm afraid someone will be standing behind me. When I call someone and they don't answer, I feel that they are mad at me. When someone is driving alone at night, and I ask them to call me when they aren't there, or are late getting back, I automatically fear they have gotten in a wreck and were killed, and this normally makes me cry.

I was recently diagnosed with Bipolar disorder, and am unmedicated, due to having a severe allergic reaction to my last medication, which my doctor took me off of. I've never told him how paranoid I am, so I was wondering, if I should tell him, and if being this paranoid is something that is common with Bipolar disorder? Thank you.

Can someone please help?

Last edited by sacredsparkle; 12-27-2011 at 09:29 PM.

 
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Old 12-28-2011, 11:46 AM   #2
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Re: paranoia and bipolar disorder

If you're having paranoia all the time and not just during mood episodes, you may want to talk to your doctor about being schizoaffective instead of bipolar. In straight bipolar disorder, psychotic symptoms may be present, but only during episodes of depression and/or mania. When you return to a normal mood, the psychosis goes away. However, if you're schizoaffective, you will continue to have psychotic symptoms after your mood returns to normal. Definitely tell your doctor what you've been experiencing. It may help him find better ways to treat your symptoms more effectively.

Also, some of your described fears sound more obsessional in nature. When you're worrying somebody will die in a car crash, do you do/say things to "prevent" this bad event from happening? Talking to your doctor will help tease out the origin of your fears and whether bipolar disorder is an accurate diagnosis for you.
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