| | to medicate, or
not to medicate, that is the question!
I am deciding whether to start a mood stabilizer (would be lamictal) or try to use psychotherapy alone to combat what may be bipolar I, but doctors have been hesitant to diagnose. My question is for those of you who have accepted your diagnosis and have been on medication for a long time, how does medicated you feel you "normal" you prior to medication/diagnosis?
I'm struggle to grapple with whether medication will provide me with an "aha thank god I'm me again" -OR- whether it will make me feel like a less-than-me, numb me. Do you feel fully yourself on medication?
I'm caught in negatives about taking medications: loss of me, my originality and personality; idea of being less high spirited or restricted; perhaps keeping me from my liveliest, most productive, most intense, most outgoing and vivacious, i.e. from being me! Moods are essential part of life, so I don't want to be numbed out of being me...