Recent visits with my psychiatrist as well as the fact that I have not been doing well in the last few months, nor have I gotten better under his care in the last year, prompted some discussion about possible other diagnoses. I have been diagnosed with Major depression, GAD, OCD, and an Eating Disorder in Remission. I am on 60mg of Prozac but it is not helping me. I do not experience mania or even what I would consider Hypomania, but I do have marked fluctuations in mood, motivation, and energy. Most of the time I am down, depressed, low energy, hopeless, helpless, etc. Then I have days where I feel a little better, not wonderful, but it's easier to get through the day. Then, every once in a while, I have a day or two where I feel great. Not on top of the world, but positive, motivated, energetic, and inclined to have lots of ideas running through my head of things I want to do. Sometimes I even go on cleaning sprees. Now I do enjoy cleaning but when I'm depressed, I don't have the energy. But every once in a while, I just feel the need to keep going. A lot of times, my moods flucuate between depression and irritability/agitation. I pick arguements with my boyfriend, I'm very insecure, and nothing makes me happy. We have always considered these a part of my OCD and perfectionism. I also have severe indecision about my future and my relationship.....one day I want him, then I'm not sure, then I love him, then I don't know if he's the right one. It drives me crazy. I don't know if this is due to my anxiety about making the wrong decisions for my future or if it is due to something else inside.
My psychiatrist mentioned that I could possibly have "atypical bipolar" which I assume is Bipolar NOS. I don't meet the critera for Bipolar II with the hypomania stages. Has anyone ever heard of a mild Bipolar or Bipolar that flucuates between depression and irritability/agitation like I mentioned??? He also said that Prozac could be making me worse since sometimes SSRIs alone make Bipolar worse. When I increased my prozac from 20 to 40 and 40 to 60 in the past, I felt activated, nervous, anxious, irritable, and my thoughts were going too fast. He said that could be a sign that the prozac is "activating" something. We are now in the midst of switching to Zoloft. From what I have written here, can anyone else relate to me???
The following user gives a hug of support to USmiss: notmyillness (02-04-2013)
I should also add that in the past, I have had anger outbursts when I've been argueing with my mother or boyfriend. I have thrown things, punched walls, and when I was younger I used to hit myself in the head. I don't know if this is just anger issues or something more.
I hope you get this...Sweetie I have so been there. I've never heard of soft or hard bipolar. I think some of us can have more extreme symptoms than the person standing next to us . The one thing that really hits home is your relaltionship with your boyfriend. I've had the same experience. Poor guy I finally broke up with him. I'm not sure if it was for my piece of mind or to spare him anymore anguish. I know I did him a favor. I'm just saying thats what worked for me and he was cheating. Honestly if you haven't left that Dr yet, I would say look a for a new one. List the symptoms you did here and print them. "it gets better"
For many Mania is rage,aggressive behavior. Screaming hitting and throwing things..So you might be having mania if you are having this type of behavior..So that would be Bipolar..
Thing is, that behavior only happens when I get into a fight with my mom. It doesn't happen for no reason or in public or anything. I think I just have a temper problem and impulsively react to emotions.