"Mild" or "Soft" Bipolar???
Recent visits with my psychiatrist as well as the fact that I have not been doing well in the last few months, nor have I gotten better under his care in the last year, prompted some discussion about possible other diagnoses. I have been diagnosed with Major depression, GAD, OCD, and an Eating Disorder in Remission. I am on 60mg of Prozac but it is not helping me. I do not experience mania or even what I would consider Hypomania, but I do have marked fluctuations in mood, motivation, and energy. Most of the time I am down, depressed, low energy, hopeless, helpless, etc. Then I have days where I feel a little better, not wonderful, but it's easier to get through the day. Then, every once in a while, I have a day or two where I feel great. Not on top of the world, but positive, motivated, energetic, and inclined to have lots of ideas running through my head of things I want to do. Sometimes I even go on cleaning sprees. Now I do enjoy cleaning but when I'm depressed, I don't have the energy. But every once in a while, I just feel the need to keep going. A lot of times, my moods flucuate between depression and irritability/agitation. I pick arguements with my boyfriend, I'm very insecure, and nothing makes me happy. We have always considered these a part of my OCD and perfectionism. I also have severe indecision about my future and my relationship.....one day I want him, then I'm not sure, then I love him, then I don't know if he's the right one. It drives me crazy. I don't know if this is due to my anxiety about making the wrong decisions for my future or if it is due to something else inside.
My psychiatrist mentioned that I could possibly have "atypical bipolar" which I assume is Bipolar NOS. I don't meet the critera for Bipolar II with the hypomania stages. Has anyone ever heard of a mild Bipolar or Bipolar that flucuates between depression and irritability/agitation like I mentioned??? He also said that Prozac could be making me worse since sometimes SSRIs alone make Bipolar worse. When I increased my prozac from 20 to 40 and 40 to 60 in the past, I felt activated, nervous, anxious, irritable, and my thoughts were going too fast. He said that could be a sign that the prozac is "activating" something. We are now in the midst of switching to Zoloft. From what I have written here, can anyone else relate to me???