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Old 02-16-2013, 11:58 PM   #1
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Angry I dont know what to do...

HI. Im a 16yr old male in highschool, ive been having trouble focusing and paying and its majorly affecting my schoolwork. before high school ive always been able to compensate for my attention problems because of my intelligence; but last year i fell into a major depression and havent been the same since. i cant seem do anything right anymore and ive been failing because i CANT find any motivation to battle with the constant annoyances that haunt me in class and at home.

ive developed a really hard time mapping my emotions and having normal self-esteem because i cannot seem to flow with the subconscious dynamics of social groups. i always feel excluded and dont know how to act, it feels like a major disconnect and i dont know what to do. ive talked to a therapist but told him i havent had any issues with my thoughts because ive tried talking to my parents about it but they keep shutting me down with "you used to be a bright student" and "you dont have anything, your fine" but im not, ive lost all interest in school or anything that requires constant organized thought. i constantly feel stressed and lethargic because i have to trudge every day in a hazy fog unable to concentrate; physically there, but detached unable to even complete this sentence... i lost my train of thought. again. >:(

some problems i keep having; when reading i have a hard time registering concepts because all of a sudden i lose my concentration while i still have my eyes are on the words and switch focus to something completely different. also its very frustrating when people are directly addressing me and i "snap" out of focus and completely lose track of where the conversation was at. i know im intelligent and know alot but i feel so lost in my head; disoriented and confused my thoughts are all over the place i overlook even the most obvious things. i can keep my mind on something for only so long before i find myself missing assignments, notes, and key points: its like my brain doesnt know what important things to keep track of and what to ignore. please help i cant keep flunking school anymore... :(

 
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Old 02-17-2013, 06:48 AM   #2
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Re: I dont know what to do...

I would try to talk with your parents again and ask for more help, but if they still resist, go to your guidance counselor. It's possible that they may be able to connect you with someone to talk to. You are very articulate and it sounds to me like you have a lot of symptoms of ADHD, of depression, and maybe even anxiety. Keep reaching out for help. I wish you the very, very best. Find someone to listen to you!

 
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Old 02-17-2013, 01:26 PM   #3
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Re: I dont know what to do...

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Originally Posted by sweetpotato13 View Post
I would try to talk with your parents again and ask for more help, but if they still resist, go to your guidance counselor. It's possible that they may be able to connect you with someone to talk to. You are very articulate and it sounds to me like you have a lot of symptoms of ADHD, of depression, and maybe even anxiety. Keep reaching out for help. I wish you the very, very best. Find someone to listen to you!
yes i know i have been depressed for quite some time, its even starting to take its toll on my physical health; i constantly have bags under my eyes and often sleep during the day even though i get enough sleep and eat a healthy diet. as for the ADHD, i seem to display inattentiveness over all the other symptoms which makes sense because my dad is very much this way too; talking directly at him only to find that he wasnt even listening, among other "distracted" behaviors that fit what im experiencing as well. i dont think my parents are directly resisting to help me, but are denying there even is a problem because i always used to find ways to keep ahead of the class in my previous years of school but now its too much to bear especially with my social anxiety and depressive thoughts clouding my mind. i have scheduled visits with my therapist, the first time i was with my parents and was hesitant to talk about these problems in front of them. next time it will be just a 1 on 1 visit, it might ease the pressure of opening up with my problems. and as i said before, i have kind of a hard time mapping my issues because i often feel nervous and closed even to myself, but i hope disusing will clarify these confusing emotions that stem from my problem to connect and listen. and thank you for telling me to keep reaching out because i often feel so overwhelmed and just bury my feelings because nobody understands, and they all criticizes me for my inability focus and work while i keep failing because of it.

 
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Old 02-17-2013, 02:52 PM   #4
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Re: I dont know what to do...

Your feelings are important, never forget that!

 
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Old 02-17-2013, 06:00 PM   #5
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Re: I dont know what to do...

Sorry you are feeling this way. I just recently helped someone I know with similar symptoms. I have to ask a few questions if you don't mind answering them. Do you feel disconnected from everything around you? Do you have a lot of anxiety? Do you spend a lot of time on the computer, gaming or alone? Have you lost weight?

 
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Old 02-17-2013, 08:07 PM   #6
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Re: I dont know what to do...

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Sorry you are feeling this way. I just recently helped someone I know with similar symptoms. I have to ask a few questions if you don't mind answering them. Do you feel disconnected from everything around you? Do you have a lot of anxiety? Do you spend a lot of time on the computer, gaming or alone? Have you lost weight?
yes, exactly my symptoms. i spend time alone; sometimes watching shows or playing games. i've lost 50lbs in a 3 month span: lost interest and taste in food and feeling hopeless when i think about the future.

 
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Old 02-17-2013, 09:10 PM   #7
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Re: I dont know what to do...

Ok I want you to know you will be fine. You need to stop worrying as that is the main reason you can't get out of these feelings. You need to be social and do things even when you don't feel like doing them. The more you distract yourself the quicker you will feel like yourself again. I am helping someone who is going through this exact same thing right now. He didn't want to do anything, slept all the time but never felt rested, felt disconnected, had no interest in anything such as sports, friends, food. You need to talk to your parents and ask them to help you out. But if you can't get them to help you then you can do it on your own. Many young people your age go through this and don't understand it. Plan out your day and make sure you stick to it. Include working out, seeing friends, eating even when you don't want to, anything that will keep you busy and distracted. Just as a side note...smoking pot will sometimes bring on these symptoms of feeling disconnected so stay away from it. You will come out of this as long as you stop worrying and get active and distracted. Feel free to ask me anything.

 
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Old 02-17-2013, 09:44 PM   #8
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Re: I dont know what to do...

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Originally Posted by Liarose25 View Post
Ok I want you to know you will be fine. You need to stop worrying as that is the main reason you can't get out of these feelings. You need to be social and do things even when you don't feel like doing them. The more you distract yourself the quicker you will feel like yourself again. I am helping someone who is going through this exact same thing right now. He didn't want to do anything, slept all the time but never felt rested, felt disconnected, had no interest in anything such as sports, friends, food. You need to talk to your parents and ask them to help you out. But if you can't get them to help you then you can do it on your own. Many young people your age go through this and don't understand it. Plan out your day and make sure you stick to it. Include working out, seeing friends, eating even when you don't want to, anything that will keep you busy and distracted. Just as a side note...smoking pot will sometimes bring on these symptoms of feeling disconnected so stay away from it. You will come out of this as long as you stop worrying and get active and distracted. Feel free to ask me anything.
thanks for the advice, yes ive quit smoking pot (at least for now) but i know what you mean by those negative symptoms. im starting to feel better with my emotions and discovering new things about certain relationships ive often overlooked, some of the problems with my self esteem are caused by people who i used to see as friends but now understand that its been destructive towards my emotions, and have since stopped having contact with. i continue to have problems focusing in class and i can feel an underlying disconnect with my short term attention and attention management, the symptoms of ADD describe exactly my problems with inattentiveness and thought process. how would i bring this up to my parents as a SERIOUS issue that needs to be dealt with?

 
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Old 02-18-2013, 12:54 AM   #9
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Re: I dont know what to do...

Being a Mom myself, I would want to help my child. You need to approach your parents with a serious conversation about how you are feeling and how the feelings are affecting your education and life. It may be best to schedule an exam with your doctor to check you out physically and run some blood work just to make sure the symptoms aren't vitamin deficiencies or such. Then you can explain your symptoms to your doctor and with your parents devise a plan to get you the help you need. You were a good student and it seems that you are concerned and want to get back on track. This is a very good sign that you realize you need help.

 
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Old 02-19-2013, 07:05 PM   #10
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Re: I dont know what to do...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Liarose25 View Post
Being a Mom myself, I would want to help my child. You need to approach your parents with a serious conversation about how you are feeling and how the feelings are affecting your education and life. It may be best to schedule an exam with your doctor to check you out physically and run some blood work just to make sure the symptoms aren't vitamin deficiencies or such. Then you can explain your symptoms to your doctor and with your parents devise a plan to get you the help you need. You were a good student and it seems that you are concerned and want to get back on track. This is a very good sign that you realize you need help.
thanks for the support, i just had a talk with my therapist. he is glad im feeling better about my emotions and let me know that he will be there to discuss my feelings. as for the ADD; he has asked lots of questions and noticed my attention and focus problems. he also noticed my constant fidgeting among other physical symptoms that fit the add profile. he is eager to help me out with my disorder but needs me to pass a clean UA in order to diagnose and more clearly describe the symptoms that are unique to me. also, he sees my failing grades as not being lazy, but unable to efficiently deal with my thought process in a way to get things done. i hope he gets to the bottom of things and finds a way for me to be more attentive and motivated in life.

 
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Old 02-20-2013, 08:20 AM   #11
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Re: I dont know what to do...

It's good to hear that you are getting help. Stay strong and remember to take care of yourself.

 
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