Posted this on another thread, but desperate for answers or advice....I am so heartbroken I dont feel like I am in my own body....out of body walking in a fog....is this really real?
My father was diagnosed this Friday the 13th with Peritoneal Mesothelioma. this is in the stomach and now in the chest cavity. He had fluid drained from around his lung and the pictures from his biopsy surgery shows no mass but it does show multiple nodules on his stomach lining which is the cancer. He is not a candidate for surgery or radiation, only chemo and he is unsure about taking it. He is so weak, breathless (on oxygen), no appetite and has lost lots of weight. He has been feeling unlike himself since January but just got diagnosed and has been told he has 9-12 months to live, but if he does not regain energy he will not make it 2 more months in my families eyes(so sad). This is the hardest thing I have had to face at the happiest time of my life, my husband and I have finally had a child after 2 years of trying and now dad will not get to see his grandson grow up. He is named after my dad and it breaks my heart. Any advice on how to get through this, what time you think my dad may have and should he consider the chemo? I am at a loss for words, direction, feelings etc. The only good thing that has come from this is that he was saved on June 7, 2008. Thank you for your help in advance and I am sorry for anyone else experiencing this terrible disease. Who knows, my mom, sister or myself may end up with it now b/c of the contact with daddy's clothes.....a friend of mine told me of this board to help me and I hope that I may find some hope or comfort here. Please Help!!
I'm so sorry to hear about this. I know this has to be hard on you and your family. My advice is to spend as much time with him as you can and pray for him as much as you can. You and your family will also be in my prayers.
thanks for your kind words and prayers....we can use all the prayers we can get...thank you so much for your sincerity. This is the hardest thing I have ever had to go through. I think I see him everyday and they are gonna start staying with me...so I am gonna make the most of the time I have left with him. We have always been so very close and I think God for every moment we have had together. Just isnt fair someone knew this product would eventually kill someone and they made it anyways just to make a dollar...that is what hurts my dad the most b/c they are taking him away from his girls. Please keep your prayers coming and I will update from time to time.
I have just lost my dad after nearly 11 months from being diagnosed from malignant mesothelioma.
I understand that feeling, the devastation,. wanting to wake up and hoping its just all a dream, the thought of being in this world without him is unbearable.
My advice to you is to take one day at a time, enjoy the good days, try and keep your chin up on the not so good days and spend as much time as you can with him just loving him and supporting him.
My heart and prayers go out to you and your family and everyone who is reading this that is being touched by this horrible disease.
take Care Linda. xxx
i am so sorry to hear that you have lost your dad.....I can't even imagine being in your shoes....I know my time is not far away, my parents are staying with me and my husband now and daddy is now on a walker to get from bed to the couch, no energy and is just wasting away....we have talks and cry and that is one thing I am thankful for, being able to tell him how much he means to me....The doctor said 9-12 months with chemo, but I dont think he is gonna be able to take it as week as he is .....he doesnt think he has more than 2 months and I have to agree if he doesnt get any better...this is the hardest thing in my life. I appreciate your kind words, support and advice. I will do all those things I can until his last day with us, just never thought it would be so soon.
well....as we all will post one day or another due to this illness.....my father has passed away after only less than a month after diagnosis. He was spitting up blood on July 4th and we rushed him to the ER via ambulance...he quickly faded and on July the 9th at 11:30 with me, my sister, my mom, my niece, his sister, my sisters boyfriend and daddy's friend by his side, we watched him take his last breath....this was the hardest few days I have ever been through and I just have an empty spot in my heart and in my life...how do I go on? I miss him so much already. This disease is so awful, fast and cruel. It is also unfair that they get this from a product that someone KNEW would kill someone one day and they did it anyways...his kidneys shut down and the toxins started filling his body making him halucinate (sp?), and that was the worst thing in the world to watch, but we had to be there to calm him down during his spells. I know that my daddy is in a much better place with no pain or worry but we, who are left here without him, hurt the most for our own selfish reasons...he was my dad, my best friend and I will miss him with every ounce of me until I see him again....for all of you who are going through this, my heart breaks for you, but please take every opportunity you get to tell that person just how much they mean to you.....I am thankful for that.....
God Bless each of you.
I'm so saddened to hear about the passing of your dad. There's no words that I can say or find that makes the loss for you any easier, but know others out here do care and with the love and support of your family & friends they will help you get thru.
It is so early for me too after losing my dad only 3 weeks ago I'm feeling your grief and that emptiness. I visit my mum and it is so hard I am still expecting him to walk out & sit and have a cuppa with us. His bedroom is still the same way it was, we havent even washed the pyjamas he last wore, or unpacked his suitcase that we took to hospital for him, we just cant change anything, not yet.......its too soon.........
I miss him so much but I could never wish for him to come back and go thru that again.
I am so sorry for you as well...I know what you mean about expecting them to just walk in the room. Today was the first day we drove to mom and dads house since he passed and I could not stop crying. I hope my mom sells her house soon (she is living with us) b/c if she has to move back in it will be too hard for us to even visit her without daddy there. I know the pain of missing your dad, but as far as knowing just exactly how you feel Linda, I don't...but know I have the same sadness for missing my dad as you do. I thank God for the years and the memories and I hope that he is now happy and painfree...I want him here with me but not as sick as he was. You are right when you say that, it is too hard to go through for any of us, him our us. I have thought of your family a lot as well, and I hope that time heals our wounds, or at least puts a bandade on them......God Bless you.
I have such deep felt pain for the both of you. But I need to ask you a question, and hope it doesn't upset you.
Did your fathers have a support group they used at all. I am a 36yo an was diagnosed with peritoneal mesothelioma this year and I can't find a support group.
Can either of you help me????
Thank you for your kind words. I'm sorry to hear that you have been diagnosed with mesothelioma. You are so young and have a lot to live for. Stay positive. My prayers will be with you & your family. In answer to your question my father did not have any support groups. Have you tried the website for the cancer council which is www.cancercouncil.com.au. they have a lot of great information & there is a sub title for support groups and tool to check if there is one close to your address. take Care Linda.