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Old 05-03-2009, 04:16 PM   #16
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Re: stillbirth at 27 weeks when to try again

i'm 8 weeks pregnant now. it seems like time is going by soo slowly. i'm not due until december and that's when i had madilyn in '08. i had my first doctor's appointment and ultrasound last week. everything looked great. it doesn't seem like i'm really pregnant yet, but it's so early it will probably take a while longer. i don't feel that nervous yet, i think once the baby starts moving then i will be since there was a cord accident with madilyn. the doctor said they'd do extra monitoring starting at 23 weeks. i'm not really sure there's anything they can do about a cord accident though. i did feel sad the day of my doctor's appointment i cried all the way there. i just kept thinking about madilyn and how just because i'm pregnant it doesn't necessarily mean i will be having a baby when all is said and done. usually i feel happy and i still feel like i'm blessed. and i cannot wait until december!

 
Old 05-11-2009, 01:21 AM   #17
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Re: stillbirth at 27 weeks when to try again

Hey sweetie...well Ive read your previous posts and I must say CONGRATS on your pregnancy! you've been through alot as we all have on here..I too delivered an angel baby, Hannah...I was 22 weeks, and she was too small to survive. Its been alittle over a month almost 2 months and the pain is still VERY real...most days are still hard for me, and I too deal with friends and realitives who are pregnant and most are due around the same time as my Hannah was due...its even harder because I work in the health care industry dealing with pregnancies EVERY DAY!! I know God has a plan, but sometimes its hard not to question him and ask"why me...why my baby" right now Im supposed to be buying baby clothes, starting a nursery etc...but instead Im growing a memorial garden, packing away her box of memories..clothes etc...and dreaming of her everyday! We too, Hannah's daddy and myself, are DEFINATELY wanting to try again soon...and secretly Im almost wondering if I am preggers already...same symptoms as with our daughter but not willing to think about the possibility yet..we've been careful...but we were "careful" when we got pregnant with our little angel...so who knows our Dr. told us to wait a year, we talked him into telling us 6 months...but IF it happens it happens..its in Gods hands MOSTLY, all I know is you need to take it one day at a time...take a moment out of each day to get to know that little baby growing inside you, its ok to be excited and scared at the same time... and even though it's scary, and your going to be on a rollercoaster of emotions...this is your baby...and your little girl is smiling down from heaven waiting to see her sister or brother healthy, happy and in your arms...much love and many prayers for a healthy pregnancy...keep us posted

 
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Old 05-26-2009, 06:43 PM   #18
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Re: stillbirth at 27 weeks when to try again

Just wanted to pop in and say congrats and Keep the faith.

16 years ago we lost our son when I was 28 weeks along with him. It was one of the worst experiences of my life. The pregnancy was a little rough (my first) but nothing to be concerned about. I too went to the Dr. only to be told there was not heartbeat etc.

I was induced the next day and able to hold and say goodbye to him.

We waited about a year to get pregnant again not for any specific reason just because it was to much to bear. We now have 2 beautiful girls.

You probably will always remember the day. My babys day is June 25, his due date was August 23.

The girls know they will have an older brother to meet someday in heaven.

Be well

 
Old 06-01-2009, 11:03 PM   #19
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Re: stillbirth at 27 weeks when to try again

madilynsmommy,

I am sooo sorry for your loss I too lost my first baby, a little girl, Caitlyn at 17 weeks on December 9th 2006. I had a missed miscarriage & was given no answers as to what happened, which i was told was a good thing because otherwise it can get complicated if there was certain reasons for her death.

Congratulations on your pregnancy news & i'm wishing you all the luck in the world. Try to enjoy it, even though i know it's easier said than done, but like other posters have mentioned, it's in Gods hands anyway, so you might as well make the most of it & try to enjoy every minute.

DH & i were unsure on when to start trying again aswell, but we were just told 1 normal period (could be because i was a lot earlier on than you). So we waited one period & then started trying & tested when my second period was due, but i wasn't pregnant & i got a little disheartened. But then i realised..... this is my body's way of telling me it's just not ready! Then i too was asking myself how do i not think about it all the time...... but i just settled with that it will happen when my body is ready & that stressing about it will only delay it. So then we tried the following month & fell pregnant with my Beautiful little girl Isabella (now 18 months) who was due on 1st December (So 8 days before the 1 year anniversary of the loss of Caitlyn).

My angel baby was due on the 19th May & from the day i lost her to the day i fell pregnant i wondered how i would cope that day! But when i found out i was pregnant in February 2006, i had something positive to focus on. I'm not saying that i forgot about my angel baby..... it just made it bearable for me when that date came around, because i felt like my world was turning again & i wasn't still stuck in pause mode watching the rest of the world go round.

That was so hard feeling as though the rest of the world was still turning & i was in a glass box just watching it. All i wanted to be was a Mummy & had had that taken away from me, so the waiting to try again was so frustrating!

I coped well when Caitlyn's due date came around. I was about 3 months pregnant with Isabella & DH & i planted a frangipani tree that we were given by family friends when we lost our little girl. Then Isabella was born on the 29th November (2 days earlier than her expected due date), & everything went well. She is now a happy healthy 18 month old & we are currently trying for a little baby brother or sister for her So with Isabella's birth, that also made the 1 year anniversary of our loss easier to bear. Plus we were so busy. But we didn't (& never will) forget our Angel baby Caitlyn..... we take strength from the thought that she is up there looking down on us & protecting us.

As for your friend, for some reason she doesn't seem to understand how you're hurting & she does need to be told. Perhaps if you just have a heart to heart with her it might work. Those things she said are very inconsiderate of your feelings & i can't believe she said them to be honest..... but she sounds quite self-absorbed so she may not have even realised what she's doing/saying.

I also don't think you should be organising her baby shower for her, as you are just not ready at the moment. You need to focus on yourself & the new little life inside you So while talking to her about what she's saying & how it affects you, maybe just tell her that you don't feel up to throwing her baby shower & that you have a bit to work through at the moment. But that's not to say you shouldn't go to the baby shower. That is entirely up to you & how you're feeling closer to the date. And who knows, now that you're pregnant again, you might decide you want to throw her a baby shower.

Anyhow, i could rant & rave all day, but i'd better cut it short[er] than u intended HAHHA. An idea would be to do something special for your baby Madilyn on her due date, perhaps plant a nice tree or bury a letter box in the garden for her! It helped me in my grieving process & moving forward with my life.

Also, your pregnancy WILL feel as though it's going sooo slowly, but once you give birth to your little bundle of joy, you'll wonder where the time went, so really enjoy being pregnant & use this special time for bonding with your little bean! Just try & think of the positives & the light at the end of the tunnell. It took me a while, but i can remember one day just waking up & thinking "I can see a happy ending now!". So lap it up sweety

Goodluck with the remainder of your pregnancy & keep us all updated on the pregnancy board.

Numb Xx

 
Old 06-03-2009, 04:19 PM   #20
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Re: stillbirth at 27 weeks when to try again

I'm just a little over 12 weeks now. I don't know if I have said my due date, but it's around December 13-15. I had Madilyn on December 10th of last year, so it'll be about a year apart exactly. I have decided to go ahead and give my friend a shower. I realize that she said some things that she definitely shouldn't have, but I don't think she intentionally did it and although I consider her a friend I just take it for what it's worth. She is due in July and I am happy for her. I don't think I will want to hold her baby.. maybe that sounds weird I don't know, but I just don't want to.

I've been to the doctor 2 times. At 7 weeks I had an ultrasound, physical, and my pap smear, and everything came back fine. Then at 11 weeks I just had a regular check up and they heard the heartbeat with the doppler. The baby's heart rate is 158. My doctor told me at about 23 or 25 weeks they're going to have me start coming in more frequently even up to 2 times a week. I'm going to have a lot more ultrasounds and they're going to listen to the heartbeat for 20 to 30 minutes at a time. Since I lost Madilyn because of a cord accident they said they don't really consider me high risk, but they just want to make sure that nothing happens this time, which they said they don't expect anything to. I'm nervous to go that much because for some reason I always feel a little sad when I'm at the doctor's. I'm not sure if it's because it's the place where they couldn't find Madilyn's heartbeat and I found out the horrible news, or the fact that I see all these happy soon to be moms who are completely at ease about everything. Maybe going that much will make me less nervous because I will get to hear the heartbeat more frequently. I'm not sure. I'm not really feeling "nervous" yet. I think once I start feeling the baby move then that will be when I get really nervous. I'm just hoping everything is going to be fine. I think it will, but I don't really like to say it because I feel like I'm going to jinx something!

 
Old 03-09-2010, 05:42 PM   #21
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Re: stillbirth at 27 weeks when to try again

How did everything turn out? You havent posted in quite sometime. I hope all is well.

 
Old 03-20-2010, 06:12 AM   #22
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Re: stillbirth at 27 weeks when to try again

I'd love to know that things turned out okay in this case since your baby must have been born by now.

 
Old 03-20-2010, 11:00 PM   #23
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Re: stillbirth at 27 weeks when to try again

I saw this post again, and I'd love to hear how things went for you as well.

I've got very sad news myself. I lost my baby at 18 weeks due to amniotic sac breaking at 16 weeks. I thought I was just leaking urine, but found out there was no fluid and no chance of the lungs developing. The genetics, kidneys, and my cervix were fine, so it's basically unexplained. I did have very low PAPP-A in the first trimester (below 5th percentile) which increases your chances for a variety of problems/poor outcome. My hCG was also elevated.

I'm trying to look forward to trying again in a couple months.

 
Old 03-22-2010, 09:44 PM   #24
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Re: stillbirth at 27 weeks when to try again

sorry i haven't posted anything for so long! i had my baby girl november 30th 2009.. it went great. she weighed 7 lbs 14 oz and was 20 1/4 inches long. we named her gemma kate. she is almost 4 months now! i love being a mommy! it is the best and i can't wait to have another one!


i had weekly doctor appointments starting at 23 weeks! it was crazy, but also kind of a relief to get to hear the heartbeat every week. i had 10 ultrasounds in all and lots of nonstress tests and biophysical profiles. i was induced 2 weeks early because my doctor didn't want me to wait any longer than i had to. my only request was that i didn't go over my due date.. i think i had a really good doctor! my epidural didn't work.. they tried 3 different times, but it really wasn't that bad! i was only in active labor for a short time and had gotten the epidural when i really didn't even need it! it would have been nice if it had worked when i hit about 8 cm though! but about 15 minutes later i was at a 10 and pushing so it didn't matter much! also not having an epidural made me push really hard because i wanted it to be over with! i only had to push 3 times! it was a great experience and i can't wait to get to do it again! it will be scary every time i go through a pregnancy but the end result is definitely worth it! i miss madilyn so much and after having gemma i know exactly what i missed out on and for a few weeks after having gemma it was bitter sweet.. especially since 10 days after gemma was born was madilyn's angelversary. i can't change what has happened. i can just live my life to the fullest and be thankful for all the wonderful things in my life. i will never forget about madilyn! there are definitely tough times, especially late at night when i can't help but cry. i don't know if this makes any sense but i am still thankful that god put her in my life because she is and will always be my first baby girl. i would never change the fact that my husband and i made her.. i wish things could have been different. i think about her every day and can't wait to see her again!

i tried to put some pics on here but it won't let me!

Last edited by madilynsmommy; 03-22-2010 at 10:11 PM.

 
Old 03-30-2010, 10:34 PM   #25
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Re: stillbirth at 27 weeks when to try again

I'm so happy for you Thanks for sharing your wonderful news!

 
Old 03-31-2010, 02:03 AM   #26
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Re: stillbirth at 27 weeks when to try again

to everyone just becuase of one lost their is always another try.....i believe that lost will be the angle in the next child....this is why i say this becuase i was 18 yrs old 22 wks preg went into labor and i didnt know i just thought i was low an water so i was drinking water all day i thought that would make the cramps go away ( iwas 18 my first preg what did i know?) so i stayed at wrk cuase my boss told me she went throught the same thing she put me in a non movement part of the job but the cramp still where coming...i wrked my 8 hrs then drove home which was 45 min away from my job didn't really fell any pain but some i walk into my house told my mom and dad i wasn't felling i had cramps i called the doctor he told me go to the e.r. now remember i'm 18 at 22 wks preg i tell my mom and dad i'll be home soon dont wrry they r just going to give me an iv and send me home...thats what i thought.....well i get there they check me and they tell me i have to go to labor and delivery right away...i told them i cant i needed to call the babys dad and someone to be there with me.....they told me i had less then 15 min cuase i was 9cm dilated and the baby still and a heart beat and moving...i call home got mom and dad to get to the hosp with the rest of the fam after everyone got there beside the baby dad they had to break the water bag cuase the pain wa getting so bad....they broke the bag and they lost the babys headthey couldn't feel it anymore i told them the baby moved up under my rib they thought i was crazy they did an utrasound and found him under my rib and my pain stop after breaking the bag that was at 7 10 pm i told them he was waiting for his dad....durning this time they made me make the choice again of letting my son live or past...when i had to make it the 1st time no was their to help me i didnt want my son to die but they told me some stuff that i didnt want my son to live with for the rest of his life so i choose to let him past way i thought to my sef if it was meant for me to have him i would have him march and not nov.....my son was born alive and was baptised and lived for almost 2 hrs whit no michines and was making noises and i let him pass away....and i think about it everyday how i believe i made a mistake my son would be 10 yrs now...but i got preg 4 month later the month i was to have my son A.J. and had a healthy girl on christmas eve and i beleive that is my angle my son sent o me cuase he couldn't be with me and sent me another angle my daughter...the reason i believ this is becuase my son was due march 17th 2000 and was born nov 22 1999 and i got preg around st pattys day 2000 with my daughter and had her on christmas eve 2000 they r 11 months and 2 days apart they are irish twins i have pictures of my son after he was born and have his ashes...my daughter looks just like his pictures in the face in her newborn pic i bellieve my son sent me her and i'm proud to say she is my daughter...but i can say i made a mistake giving up on my son i wish i gave him a chance....plse dont hate me

 
Old 04-10-2010, 01:34 PM   #27
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Re: stillbirth at 27 weeks when to try again

Irishbridget- I'm so sorry for your loss. That is a lot of heartache to go through. 22 weeks is really way too early for any good chance at survival and what the Drs were telling you was probably correct. Please don't beat yourself up about it. Your decision was right for you at the time.

 
Old 06-08-2010, 07:12 PM   #28
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Re: stillbirth at 27 weeks when to try again

I am so sorry. My doctor told me after my first I could try. The risk of to soon is usually because of an infection, but you didn't have an infection so you should be just fine. Lots of luck and love this time

 
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