SINCE I'VE BEEN DXED WITH MS. BOY OH BOY. I'VE HAD SOME REALLY GOOD DAYS, SOME OK DAYS, SOME BAD DAYS AND SOME TERRIBLE DAYS!!!
WELL I'VE BEEN MIA AGAIN CAUSE OF SOME TERRIBLE DAYS. THE PAIN IS RIDICULOUS (SP). I FEEL SLUGGISH. I FEEL LIKE I'M HERE BUT NOT HERE. MOST OF THE TIMES OVER THE PAST 5 DAYS I FELT LIKE CRAWLING WITHIN MYSELF CAUSE I FELT LIKE ****** AND I WANTED EVERYBODY TO LEAVE ME ALONE. MY HUSBAND TRIES. HE REALLY DOES, BUT HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND AND I PRAY TO GOD THAT HE IS NEVER IN THIS SITUATION FOR HIM TO. I'VE BEEN IN CONSTANT PAIN, EVEN TO THE POINT OF CRYING MYSELF TO SLEEP OR SLEEPING ALL DAY. (JUST GOT UP IT'S MEDS TIME).
BESIDES THE "CLUSTER-MIGRAINES" I FEEL LIKE MY HEAD IS STUFFED UP AND GOING TO EXPLODE AT ANY MOMENT. TODAY ALONE I LOST MY BALANCE 5 TIMES (THANK GOD I DIDN'T FALL) GOING IN AND OUT OF THE BATHROOM. I HAVE NO APPITITE. I FEEL LIKE A ZOMBIE JUST GOING THROUGH THE MOTIONS.
THE MEDS ARE SUPPOSED TO HELP ME WITH THE PAIN, BUT THEY DONT. NEURO SAID KEEP ON TAKING THEM IT TAKES ABOUT 2 WEEKS TO GET USED TO THEM AND FOR THEM TO REALLY WORK. I'M NAUSIOUS(SP, CANT SPELL NO MORE) ALL THE TIME. MY STOMACH HURTS, IT'S THESE FUNNY LIL CRAMPS. THE LEFT SIDE OF MY FACE IS STILL SWOLLEN, GONE DOWN A LIL, BUT STILL SWOLLEN. THE TINGLING IS BACK AND ANNOYING THE DAY LIGHTS OUT OF ME. I FEEL LIKE RIGHT NOW I JUST WANNA BE BY MYSELF. I THOUGHT THAT I WAS GETTING BETTER... ALL THE OLD STUFF PLUS NEW ONES ARE SURFACING. I'M TRYING TO BE STRONG (SNIFF) BUT IT'S SO SO HARD. I WANNA DISAPPEAR FOR A LIL WHILE? WHERE TO I ASK. THE HEAT OUT HERE IS KICKING MY TAIL AND IM ALWAYS INSIDE. SO THATS A DEAD ISSUE AND GREG WILL GO NUTTS ON ME! CAUSE IT'S LIKE WE'RE STICHED AT THE HIP. HEY MAYBE WE ARE!!
SO WHAT DO I DO? I TRY TO COPE, I TRY TO SMILE, I TRY TO ACT LIKE I'M REALLY FEELING BETTER BUT I'M NOT. OH DID I MENTION THAT I'M NOT WALKING ALL THAT STRONG RIGHT NOW? AND THAT I CANT DO ANYTHING FOR TOO LONG CAUSE MY LEFT EYE FEELS LIKE IT WILL FALL OUT AND THAT IT HURTS LIKE NEVER BEFORE. TRYING TO FIND AN OPTHALMOLOGIST WHO IS NOT BACKED UP FOR THE NEXT 2-3 MONTHS. I FEEL SO EXHAUSTED ALL THE TIME.
BUT KEREN IS MY NAME AND COPING AND BEING POSITIVE IS MY GAME... SO I TRY!
GUYS I THINK THIS MAY HAVE BEEN ONE OF MY LONGEST POSTS BUT I JUST HAD TO LET IT OUT BECAUSE ONLY YOU GUYS UNDERSTAND. THANKS FOR EVERYTHING. IF I'M MIA AGAIN THE EYE AND BODY IS BUGGING OUT AGAIN.
OH ON A POSITIVE TIP MS LIFE LINES CALLED TODAY. I START REBIF PRETTY SOON. HOPEFULLY ONCE I START THAT I WILL CATCH A BREAK, A LONG ENOUGH ONE. CAUSE RIGHT NOW I FEEL LIKE I CANT CATCH ONE FOR NOTHING.
BUT I KNOW THAT IN IT ALL GOD IS GOOD AND HE WILL SEE ME THOUGH.
I am so sorry to hear the problems that you are having!!! Vent all you want to because you are right, we know how you feel. I wish that there was something that I could do for you. There is one thing, and that is pray and I will absolutely do this for you!!!! You are right, God is good!! If anybody can get you through this he can!! I can also do something else for you!!! Here goes:
I hope that felt good!!!! If you need some more hugs just let me know!! I will be praying for you!!! Take care!!
Thank You So Much Michelle!!!!!!! I Haven't Smiled In Days. And You Made Me Smile. Thank You So Much. Now I'm Crying Again Because You Guys Are Soooooo Good To Me. (sorry I'm Also Crazy Emotional Lately!!)
Oh Sweetie....I wish so much I could take all that pain away from you. My first full-blown exacerbation, with many of the symptoms you mentioned, lasted a good long while too. But there IS light at the end of the tunnel, and it's NOT a train. It's hope.Don't go of yours...
My name is Mari.....I'm newly dx and love to read the post on here. They are so moving and inspirational ...... They can make you laugh smile and cry all at the same time. I just wanted to say hi and send some smiles and blessings your way ..... happy days ahead !!!!!!
It does get old, doesn't it! I have great empathy for you as my daughter had her last big attack about the same time you did, and she's not really bouncing back yet either. These summer attacks seem to take forever to get over.
I know you are holding firmly onto God's hand as he holds even more firmly onto yours. You'll get through this.
Thanks Lilc!!! I Love You Guys Too!! It's Because Of You Guys Here That I Get Out Of Bed And Come To My Pc, Even Though I Dont Feel Like It. It's Because Of You Guys I Keep Pushing And Fighting Looking To Find That Break And That Light At The End Of My Tunnel!
Didn't Sleep To Good Last Night. Went To Bed After 1am And Been Up Since 5.34am. Wow, I'm Doing Good. Feels Like College Again!!! Off To Bed Late And Up Early To Finish A Paper, Study For An Exam Or Trying Not To Over-sleep So I Wouldn't Be Late For Class. Hmm Seems Like Only Yesterday. Can't Believe That 4 Years Has Gone By So Quick!!!
Well Guys, I'm Praying For The Best Today, Even Though Right Now Pain Is Kicking My Behind, I'm Just Praying For The Best!!!!
P.s: Guys, I Thank God For Blessing Me With A Good Man!!!!!! He Stayed All Night With Me. And Is Up Now Too. In The Kitchen Making Me Breakfast Cause I Gotta Eat, Even Though I Dont Feel Like Eating!! And He Has To Get Ready For Work. Through All Of This God Has Blessed Me!!!!!!!!!
Just know that I remember you and everyone else in my daily prayers. I hope you feel better soon. God blessed me with a wonderful guy, too. It makes ALL the difference in the world just knowing he cares so much. We have 3 great kids, ages 19,14, & 12 and I just don't think I could do it alone. I know there's a bunch of you out there that are single parents, or just single and you have all my admiration for keeping it going. This is a great goup of people and when I was "kicked" off for a day, I thought I was going to die not getting to check in every few hours. When I go back to work, Praise God that I'm going to be able to, I'll miss not checking in until eve. Eveything will get so hectic! Take care and be sure to let us know how your day goes. I hope and pray less PAIN! Sue