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Old 08-14-2007, 01:37 PM   #1
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pammer HB User
cannot focus, so scared

I am new here, waiting for answers from a neuro. that I see for the first time in 2 weeks. I am a mother of 2, married to a work-a-holic. I am super-mom! I cannot stand the fact that something may be wrong, something permanent, and debilitating. My children (3&6) need me so much. I am having trouble thinking, getting through the days and moments without tears. Really, besides my husband's work schedule, my life is beautiful, but its that way because of everything that I do.

How bad, how quickly does this disease progress? I am so scared! This cannot be happening to me!

pammer

 
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Old 08-14-2007, 02:44 PM   #2
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MSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB UserMSNik HB User
Re: cannot focus, so scared

Pammer,
Stop. Your making yourself sicker by worrying about this. MANY people have progression over 20+ years. If you are still fully functioning, and have not had any real issues until now, then you are at the very beginning of your diseaese, and you will get the help you need by seeing your Neuro. You need to realize that MS doesnt kill you, and it is controllable. One of the things you might starting thinking about is your willingness to do MS therapy drugs. They are Rebif, Copaxone, Tysabri and a few others...by taking these drugs, (most are injectable, you do them yourself either every day, once a week, or 3 times a week, the last one Tysabri, is done in a hosptial setting by IV once a month) you control your disease from progressing, for the most part. Its not a guarantee, but they are designed to slow down the progression of the disease...
Stress, heat, lack of sleep and mostly anxiety are what makes this disease feel worse than it is In the past year, since I was dx with MS, ive gotten stronger and more confident, have graduated with an MBA, have gone on to get a great job, raise 3 kids, have a needy husband and am also superwoman! Nothing stops me. And, I take a shot every 2 days with Rebif...My disease is under control, it does NOT control ME.

I know youre terrified. I was, too in the beginning...but the fear in your post compells me to tell you that it WILL BE OKAY. Nothing is going to change overnight, and most MS relapses only are bad for a few days, not months....the effects can linger, but the main relapse is only a few days....steroids get relapses back under control.

Please stop panicking this early in the game....I promise you, if it is MS, you are going to have plenty of support here, and you will get thru the initial shock..once that happens, youll start dealing with this better. Weve all been where you are.
PLease dont think Im yelling at you. Im not, but I am telling you, stop and relax...your life is going to continue to be just fine. You just have to make some minor adjustments...but believe me, once you know what you are dealing with and start dealing with it - things will start looking up! Its only the NOT knowing which will make you crazy...ok?
Hugs,
Nikki
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Old 08-14-2007, 04:23 PM   #3
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Location: Salt Lake City, UT, USA
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painsucks HB User
Re: cannot focus, so scared

Pammer,

Nikki is so right. I have always been a supermom and now I am a supergrandma. I still work outside of my home 40 hours a week, one of my children and his 5 year old son lives with me and I am the caregiver for my 90 year old aunt. Yes, I've slowed down, that's only natural. I have to ask for help sometimes. But I have learned to make adjustments, listen to my body and take care of myself so that I can get the most out of every day. I have been giving myself the Copaxone injections for over 2 years now and I am proud to say that when my last MRI was done, I had no new progression! You can have the same results. MS is not a death sentence. If you find that you have MS, we're here for you, you can do this, we will help.

Keep us posted on what you learn from the neuro and try to relax.

 
Old 08-14-2007, 04:32 PM   #4
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Re: cannot focus, so scared

Pain sucks-
Way to go!! Thats the kind of honest, and compassionate message that needs to be delivered to ALL of our members! I truly agree that both taking care of yourself, as well as having a good attitude, and NOT letting MS control you, is key to living a perfectly normal life.
Today, I had the day from ****. I worked way too hard and this is coming off a weekend of traveling and doing too much. I can tell that my body is screaming for sleep and relief. I just took my Rebif shot, ate a good dinner (which I cooked) and made lunch for everyone for tomorrow. I cleaned the cat box, made a few quick calls, paid a bill online..and now Im headed for bed. I know, without any doubt that I did too much in the past 4 days..Im going to get a good nights sleep, work all day tomororw and do my best to work from home on Thursday so that I can give myself a break.

Pammer. Take it from those of us living with this disease...you are going to be just fine. And, truthfully, the waiting to find out is the hardest part....once you know what you are dealing with, you start to deal with it.

PainSucks, congrats on your clean MRI. I had one 6 months ago, which was also clean (after being on Rebif for 6 months) I mean, I have over 50 legions, but NOTHING new had developed. I have another MRI in 2 weeks, which will take me up to one year on Rebif...im praying for a repeat result! Im happy for you, I truly understand what a relief it is to know your meds are working!

Hugs to you both.
Nikki
__________________
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Old 08-14-2007, 06:34 PM   #5
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Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Edmonds, WA
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moore170 HB User
Re: cannot focus, so scared

This disease is so different for each person that I don't think anyone can tell you how fast it will progress.
I was a working outside of the home super mom when I was diagnosed in 1987.
I continued working full-time, raised happy healthy kids (they were 4 & 6 when dx'd) and kept my marriage strong. The best thing that MS did for me was make me take some time for myself and learn to relax.
My children are very independent, caring people. My employees appreciated my ability to be empathetic to their problems.
I feel having MS contributed to this. Next month my husband and I will celebrate our 29th Wedding Anniversary.
It all works out - just take care of yourself and try to not worry.
Candy

 
Old 08-14-2007, 08:41 PM   #6
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Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: ohio
Posts: 2,467
duttin HB Userduttin HB User
Re: cannot focus, so scared

Pammer,

You have gotten great advice,I however do not work outside the home.On disability from failed back surgeries then throw in the MS.

I have 4 children,21 out on her own,18 today in the Navy,16 plays every sport available and a 12 year old.basically a single mother,taking care of a historical 5 bedroom home and I have done most of the remodeling myself,from drywall to electric.

Its learning limitations,it takes me forever to complete a task,the super women in me has got up and left,but thats okay.

I get up and go to the gym every morning.

I take each day as it comes,somedays nothing gets done and others I get alot done.

having MS is not the end of the world,its just working around it.

Tonight I jogged for 10 minutes a first in 2 years,I even wear leg braces.

many live productive lives with MS,they may have a relapse and then not another for years.

Try not to stress as it will cause symptoms to be worse

 
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