Help For My Husband. - Muscular Dystrophy Message Board

pats22 · 12-08-2008, 04:06 PM

Hi,
I am new to the forum,I have read a lot of the post so far to try get a better understanding of MD.
I do not have MD myself it is my husband that has it.He was diagnosed in his early 30's and is now 56yrs, he continued to work up untill he was 50yrs he felt he had to leave by then as he felt he was becoming a danger to everyone , as he was falling all the time and did not want to bring anyone down with him.

He has a dropped foot and the muscels are wasting away in one leg , he does have a leg brace but never wears it, he is a very vain man, he also has restricted movment in his arms because of the shoulders, he can barley lift them past his waist but can bend them at the elbow,he now says his back is always sore and he gets tierd very easy, I have now noticed he keeps flexing his hands and stretching them as if they are stiffening up.

He still like to socialize and go out with his mates for a drink on a Sunday, but he cannot consume the same amount anymore, and he will not accept his illness, some days he looks terrible and when I ask if he is OK as his colour is awful he always say's yes he's OK. he will only go to the doctors to lift up his repeat perscription for mild antidepress tab's, and very rarely visits the doctor.

He will not talk about his MD to anyone not even me, I told him I was going to go on internet to find out more about it, and his answer to that was I was only looking up other peoples problems, but it was'nt it was to help me get a better understanding of it, as I feel it is now coming to the stage were, he will need more help but how do I do that or get there with a man who wont accept his illness and the seriousness of it.

I hope you all dont think that this is just a rant I am on,but maybe a cry for help

michigani · 12-10-2008, 08:58 AM

pats22,

You've come to the right place, and that wasn't a rant at all. I understand. My wife is in your situation, of sorts, and I myself am the husband with MD. I kept it secret from everyone at first. Finally I spread the word and that made it much easier. I left my work 3 years ago. I am 47. I still have a beer or 2 with my friends now and then but when I'm with them I don't talk much about the illness. We all need a break from it and like to feel "normal". He may not talk much about it because he feels nobody REALLY understands. However, he may drop hints now and then that things are tough or that he's feeling low. This may be an opportunity for you to jump in and talk about it. You know him better than anyone.

If you left-click my username "michigani" you can read some of my posts. There a lot of them! You may get an idea of what other adults with MD are going through. It tough but most of the people on this board are upbeat and optimistic with a few bad days in between. Come back anytime and ask advice. I'll try to help and I'm sure others will too. Some of us are patients, some are loved ones of patients who come here to try to better understand.

Best of luck to your hubby.