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Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Message Board


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Old 01-28-2004, 05:04 PM   #1
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Mission_Void HB User
Post I think I've got ocd symptoms.

I have depression, anxiety, and think ocd is a good possibility. Sometimes I feel like a nervous wreck. For starters I am on Clonazepam for anxiety. So for the most part that is being treated. How well? I have a real hard time relaxing. One thing I have recently done is move. I mean I have moved 4 times since October of 2002 to get away from noisey people and places. I need quiet. Don't think that word exists in apartment complexes.

I am hyper sensitive to noise! Am easily irritated by peoples sound systems ( thunderous bass sounds ) and my anxiety gets out of hand. I've already talked to the neighbor downstairs about his system. He doesn't play it loud, BUT his subs carry on up through the walls and it seems to magnify by the time it reaches upstairs. Reverberation I think it's called. Imagine hearing just a low thunderous pitch.

I used to watch tv a lot and really enjoyed a lot of things on the toob and easily got into movies or other programs. I haven't been able to consistantly go into the livingroom, sit down and get excited about anything though I managed to watch "The Terminator" for the nth time. I think my neighbor was gone or either had his sound sytem off. I worry about this though. I associate watching tv with my neighbors sound system. You know a fear of watching tv and trying to deal with these outside noises. It's like there is no peace for me.

I worry about little things like my car, what the neighbors are doing. When I hear loud noises I sometimes have to get up and check out what caused it or who it was. I told my psychologist that I'm neurotic. I must be. I also tend to have paranoid tendencies. I think about other people and things that happened between them and myself. Even if it was years ago. Ridiculous thoughts, but these things creep into my mind. I obsess about what people have done to me through the years and what if I had done this or that to help clear up a situation.

I have this big fear thing in my life too. Fear of people in general. It can be just meeting a stranger in the mail room or outside my apartment. Oh yeh, I try to stay cool and mind my own business. When outside I just feel like a bunch of eyes are on me. I try not to think about it too much. I can be laying in bed and start thinking of these confrontations with people that happened years ago and I start playing out these different scenarios. I am currently on S.S.D. and don't have to worry about being around people all day.

But I guess it's back to what I used to like doing ( watching tv ), but now I start thinking everytime I want to watch something then I will start hearing my neighbors sound system. I connect the two. It's like a fear of going into my livingroom. What I do most of the time is stay in my bedroom using my pc. Now I do enjoy that, but not all day and night. So I tend to be leaning to me having a mild form of ocd. Anyone here have any stories to tell or comments. Thanks. MV

Last edited by Mission_Void; 01-28-2004 at 05:08 PM.

 
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Old 01-30-2004, 05:00 AM   #2
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TerryB HB User
Re: I think I've got ocd symptoms.

Gee, I don't know, better run this one by your psychologist. I sense a ton of anxiety for sure. Now, some people do have a heightened sensitivity to noise. It seems like you do need to eventually find a quiet place. I don't think that you will ever find that in an appartment-type setup because people move in and move out so the neighbors will vary. If you move again, you need to be more careful about the potential for peace and quiet. In the mean time, can you wear ear plugs (not when you are trying to watch TV obviously)?

Terry

 
Old 01-31-2004, 04:28 PM   #3
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Twinlynn HB User
Smile Re: I think I've got ocd symptoms.

While I'm no expert on your own specific illness, I sure do know about OCD--and noise! When I had my first (of three) clinical depresions--aka "breakdowns!" --one of the many horrible anxieties that plagued me for the first time ever was noise. I still remember waking up the first morning after this depressive breakdown....and being horrified that just the sound of my clock ticking, next to my bed, was unbearable. This, of course, was part of my entire brain chemistry coming "unwired"--any sort of stimulation at all was unbearable. Along with many other symptoms, I could not be in a room with more than one person, could not stand a radio or television on....anything that produced what sounded to me like overwhelming noise. The anxiety was overwhelming.

At the time of this depression, I had been experiencing bad OCD (though at the time---many moons ago--I did not have the faintest idea of what OCD was!!) All I knew what that I had to rethink every single conversation with someone who was important to me to the point where all the possible permutations started to look like a tree diagram in my brain--one main trunk--with a hundred possible branches as to how that other person I spoke to might have reacted to what I said!! It was murder. Sheer insanity. It took up much of my life. But I couldn't stop it.

What saved me were good old antidepressants. It took over three weeks, but gradually the reaction to sounds, unbearable hopelessness, and some of the OCD was lessened. Ten years ago, I began Prozac--a drug that for me cleared up 99 percent of my obsessiveness--something I did not believe was ever possible.

Anyway--I was just wondering if you had ever been prescribed antidepressants as well as the anti-anxiety drugs? Antidepressants do not work instantly--but when you and your doctor hit just the right drug at just the right level--they can, for some people, be lifesavers. You may not need them. But I wanted to at least point out that there may be a lot of depression within your OCD. I now take Wellbutrin and Prozac--with the occasion half a Klonipin if I'm in a very anxious situation.

I found a wonderful psychiatrist who specialized in drugs for both depression and OCD. It's just something to think about.....

Meanwhile, I do know how much you must be suffering. I long ago decided that not having peace of mind was far worse than any physical illness I'd ever gone through. I do hope you will find relief with a doctor who investigates your symptoms more closely.

best to you, Lynn

 
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