*red faced* - Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Message Board

Gotta_Escape · 02-02-2004, 06:04 PM

In advance I would like to say that I'm sorry for this post and it's length!!!! Someone...please help me...like almost all of you, I have OCD...but my family and friends have NO idea...I have been hiding it from them for about six or seven months...before then, it wasn't bad enough...like it didn't take any effort to hide them...but ever since the summer and after a very traumatic thing happend to me, I have been getting worse and worse...I have recently started to become germophobic...like I WILL NOT touch anything that is open to the public...since I'm a teen and attend a public high school, I come into contact with things like door knobs and chairs and other things that other people touched very frequently. I FLIP out if forced to touch anything like that...on un-exsposed skin...like I cover my hand with my sleave if opening a door or something. (have gotten WAY too many weird looks from people when doing this) I also have been late to many classes because I wash my hands between classes...my anxiety level is up the roof!!! I'm so afraid to tell my family because my two sisters have autisim and with that comes a much more severe case of OCD than mine...so I'm afraid that they will be like...dissapointed that they really don't have the "normal" child they want...

I remember the other day...sitting in my math class, my hands shaking and my whole body trembling because I had gone to the bathroom before class and there wasn't any soap!!! NONE!!! I would have gone to the other bathroom, but I would have been late! So I had to wash my hands with scalding hot water, and it still didn't feel like enough!!! I was almost crying..I could barely breathe... That's only ONE of my problems...(I'm so sorry I'm rambling...but I have NEVER gotten to say anything about this!) Please give me some advice or something!!! I need help!!!!

Always_Worrying · 02-02-2004, 07:35 PM

Oh Sweetie, I really feel for you. I'm not in high school anymore, but I so know what you are going through. It really snow balled for me when my son was born 2 years ago. I know it was the added stress of someone else to worry about.
I won't touch public door knobs either. I also use my sleeve. Another big No-No is touching a public pen (like the kind a cashier has at the store that everyone uses). If I can't wash my hands right away (or use antibacterial hand sanitizer) I flip. That is ALL I can think about. The Germs on my hands.
I've been seeing a psychiatrist and a therapist. I've worked quite a bit with exposure therapy.
I strongly suggest you sit down and talk with your parents. This type of anxiety disorder is quite common. I know how you feel about not being able to talk with other people about your OCD. Growing up, I had no idea I had ocd. I thought I just worried A FREAKIN' LOT! My parents thought I was a hypochondriac and really didn't have an sympathy for me, besides, stop worrying, your fine.
I also suggest that you see a psychiatrist. They will help you deal with this so you are not alone.
Good Luck. Feel free to vent here anytime, and if you ever need an ear to talk to, I'm here.
Jaime

02-02-2004, 09:59 PM

hey, sorry to hear you're having so much trouble. i think though that if you want to get better, it's important that you tell someone you can trust about your problem and if that means telling your parents and them feeling dissapointed, then that's what has to happen. hopefully, they'll understand and be able to get you help. i, myself, started out telling a close friend of mine about it. then, eventually, i told my brother and then eventually, i told my parents, who are now paying for me to see a psychologist. there are techniques for overcoming problems like yours. the best, as far as i know, is cognitive behavior therapy or exposure and prevention therapy or whatever it's called, but you've probably heard of it. good luck to you and remember that the problem has more to do with ocd than any germs on the doorknob but help is out there if you take the right steps. remember, ocd is a big pain, but don't get too upset over it. mostly, it's in your head and try to relax and have fun as much as you can.

Gotta_Escape · 02-03-2004, 01:18 PM

Thanks you all...it really helps...I told one of my best friends...her reaction was "How do you know you really have it? I mean, it could all be in your head" I got SO mad at her..she is suposed to be there for me you know! I have listened to her problems for years now...she ALWAYS complains about her self, and her family..then like ONCE I tell her something, and I expect her to be there for me...well is she??? NO!!!!!! but thank you all for being there for me! Especially to Always_worrying ((((Hugs)))) thanks!

DrummerKev147 · 02-04-2004, 04:00 PM

Just go ahead and tell your parents when you feel ready, they'll probably get more worried if they know something's wrong and you're not saying anything.