obsessed with myself?? - Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Message Board

aLL_EyEz_oN_mE · 02-06-2004, 12:33 AM

i dont know whats wrong with me. i am so obsessed with the way i look. i spend hours getting ready everyday and if i dont look perfect i refuse to leave the house! sometimes i dont leave my house for like a week! the weird thing is that i know that im beautiful and everyone thinks so even if i dont look perfect all the time but at the same time i think im so ugly when im not perfect. even when im sitting at my house alone i have to look pretty because i always feel like someones looking at me. i even started doing homeschool because i couldnt handle trying to be perfect everyday. it wears me out trying to make myself happy. a few months ago i broke out horribly from this face lotion and i didnt go anywhere for weeks and i got so depressed that i tried to kill myself. i spent 3 days in the hospital and i think that did help my problem a little bit but not enough! do i have ocd?? or is this normal???!?! what can i do???! does anyone else obsess over themselves?? someone please help me!

ABC~Mom · 02-06-2004, 01:01 AM

this sounds like a SERIOUS self esteem problem. If your need to feel that you look perfect is so dominate in your life that when your skin broke out, you attemted suiside this is very serious. Have you talked to a therepist about this? If not i highly reccomend you do.
You said that you know you are beautiful right? if you know then why do you have to prove it to anyone? I think this could be OCD related but i honestly think it is alot deeper than that. and this is something you need to work through in therepy.
please please please becareful, and remeber being beautiful on this inside is what counts in the end

aLL_EyEz_oN_mE · 02-06-2004, 01:12 PM

well i know that im pretty...like really really pretty. everyone tells me and i do look in the mirror. its just that i know there is always a way to improve myself. so everytime i get something exactly the way i want it i just think of something else that could be better. its not really about wanting to be pretty because i already am, its more like wanting to be perfect. im convinced that i wont be happy until i am. sometimes its gets really frustrating that i cant be and i think thats what made me end up in the hospital. i realize that no one can be perfect but i dont really see anything wrong with wanting to be. the only reason why im worrying about it cuz it makes me really tired and angry. i have seen a psychiatrist and that didnt help at all. i dont even know if i have a problem?

prettyboi22 · 02-06-2004, 10:14 PM

Actually I Have This Same Problem & Am Also Told By Various People That Im Realy Attractive Have Perfect Features Etc... But I Still Obsesss With Myself And Have Low Self Esteem And Always Trying To Perfecct And Get Jealous Around Others If I Think They Are Better Looking Then Me. I Think It Is A Serious Problem Ththat Is Part Of Ocd

prettyboi22 · 02-06-2004, 10:15 PM

I Just Wanted To Add I Think The Problem Is No Matter How Attractive We Or Some People Think We Are We Will Always Feel That There Are Others Wayyyyy Better Looking Then Us & To Other People And I Think That Is Something We Cannot Live With.