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Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Message Board


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Old 07-14-2004, 06:36 PM   #1
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Join Date: Jul 2004
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New Guy

Hey everyone, My name is Tom.
I was diagnosed about 2 1/2 years ago. It all started on my last year of school. I was fearing to go outside because i was affraid that everyone was out to get me, but that slowley turned to being affraid that i was catching every disease immaginable. I ended up being stuck in my room for about 2 years for fear that if i left the house i would make people sick from what i "may have" and also, of what people might pass on to me. My mom had gone to our family doctor and he proscribed me a low dosage of prozac which made me feel even worse. I then said, NO to any kind of drug. Well, after two years of sitting in my room and gaining 130 pounds, i decided i had enough and tried to take my life. My mom called 911 and i was taken to emergency where i had to drink some nasty stuff to soak up the chemicals in my stomach.
FINALLY, after that, i got the help that i needed. A counsoler tried to admit me into the phsyc ward thinking i was phsycotic, but after an evauation by one of the doctors, and repeated attemps by me to tell them that it was OCD, they got me a phsyciatrist. He then put me on clomipromine(anafranil). I started off at a low dosage, which seemed to do absolutley nothing accept take away a bit of the depression. After about 4-6 months, i was up at the max dosage, and it still wasnt helping me. That is when i tried for the second time to take my life. I had downed a whole bottole of the clomipromine(anafranil), and once again, off to the emergancy room i went. Well, my phsyc decided to add some effoxor to the daily pill count. Well, that changed everything for me. I was slowly begining to control some of my thoughts and after about 3 months of that, i began to shower for only an hour(was showring for 3+ hours) and was finally able to hung someone for the first time in almost two years.
Since then, i have come a long way. I am now able to go out in public, shake hands, hung family, and believe it or not, i have full custody of my nephew. My OCD is far from being under control, as i still have major bathroom issues, and i have yet to be able to have an intimate relationship(i am 21, 22 in just over a month). I am working on being able to work, but at the moment, i cannot use public bathrooms for fear of catching an std from the toilet seat, and i dont think my boss will be very happy if i said, "Hey boss, ill be back in 30 min, im going to drive home to use the bathroom".
I didnt go to any kind of CBT therapist, but i did a lot of CBT myself. I spent hours at a time, going through senarios in my head, and eventually did what i feared and after repeated occurences, i began not to fear certain things anymore. Also, I found out nov of last year, that my sister was addicted to crack cocain, and at which time, i had to suck it up, and take care of him. Because of him, i have beaten the OCD so fast, because i did not want him to go into foster care. My love of him forced me to deal with my OC issues faster than i ever would have and i will be forever thankful for that.
Just recently, i have lowered my dosage by 50mg of clomipromine(anafranil) and 75mg of effexor. I now take 200mg of clomipromine(anafranil) and 35.5mg of effexor, and i still seem to be able to control my mind just as well as before the decrease.
I never thought that i would see my life so close to "normal", and i am so happy that it is getting back there. I just thought i would share my story with you guys in hopes that i would meet other people who also suffer from OCD. Take care guys.

 
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Old 07-15-2004, 12:17 PM   #2
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Aurora, CO
Posts: 256
bm28 HB User
Re: New Guy

Hi Tom,

It is really good to hear that you are doing so well now. It is extremely difficult for people with OCD to get help sometimes because it is embarrassing, shameful, uncomfortable etc. For you, it took many years of hard times. When someone gets as low as you have there is only one place to go and that's up. It was nice that you shared your story with us. Good Luck. Beth

 
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