chloestewie

Well, I have been getting along okay on my own- although I do have my first psychiatrist appointment tomorrow which is a little scary, but at the same time, gives me hope. I have a question though - I am slowly getting over my obsession, but it feels like I take one step foreward and two steps back. Like, I got over the 'idea' of being gay - I was actually okay for about 2 weeks, but I recently started a new job and started to make friends - and I mean I like my friends - they are funny, we have a good time and we have even gone out a few times, but then one day the thought popped into my head 'what if this means you like them in a sexual way?' Its been plauging me for the last week and giving me anxiety and last night I had a panic attack and all my progress went down the drain. I know I dont really like them, but its been a looooong time since I have made new friends and its very difficult for me. Has this EVER happened to anyone??? Please relate. Im going crazy!! I mean - I remember first meeting this one girl and thinking - she is pretty- which was totally not in a sexual way - but then we became friends and now I am freaking out that I could be attracted to her, which is totally crazy, right? But its freaking me out. I mean really, has this ever happened to anyone?