Please Help! Any other parents of a young ocd/hoarder? - Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Message Board

druth · 11-13-2004, 12:57 AM

Just a week ago my 9 yr old son started picking things up to save. Such as small bits of paper. It quickly turned into his picking up small pieces of lint, hair, things so small I can't see them. He saves used paper towels, paper cups and straws, and really just doesn't want anything thrown out. He cries and is really in a panic if he happens to drop a tiny speck and can't find it again.

I never heard of ocd and didn't have a clue what was happening to my really calm, gentle, giving, very smart, perfectionist son. This goes on all day and in the last 3 days has gotten so much worse. He wants to look through trashcans (at the show), he is in such a panic about dropping a tiny speck that I end up down on the floor looking for it with him. He was crawling beside me while I swept the floor (now he cries if I start to sweep). He will only leave the house with his eyes closed so he won't see things he needs to pick up. He "univited" his friend over because he was afraid that dust and specks would get stuck on his friends shoes and leave the house forever.

My neice, who is studying to be a teacher, saw my son gathering his specks and told me he has ocd. SO here I am, on the internet, doing a search. I found a site that gave all the basic info and my son fit the category of a hoarder almost exactly.

My son cries and tells me he thinks he's going crazy. I feel like I'm the one going nuts! I've been crying my eyes out because he has changed so much. And he's such a good kid, I just don't know why this has happened to him. He seems so depressed now, it's scary. He desperately wants to stop and asks me to get him help. I did call our insurance and have an appt with a psychologist next week. I wanted to see him TODAY! or make that Yesterday! It is the weirdest thing to watch your child's personality change so quickly. From happily playing outside to now not wanting to leave the house unless his eyes are closed.

And to top it all off, my husband doesn't believe in ocd. He just yells at him to cut it out, tells him to throw all that stuff out, etc. Talk about making it worse! <sigh

I would love to hear from other parents who are going through this. I feel so alone and so does my son. When I told him it wasn't his fault (from what I read on the internet) and that many kids have this, he was so relieved! He said, SO I'm NOT going crazy?

I just bought a book that my neice recommended, called The boy who couldn't stop washing. It's after midnight now. I don't think I've gotten any sleep this week and now I'm off to read.

Thanks for listening.
desperate mom

hry33 · 11-13-2004, 08:53 AM

Hi
also get some other self help books on overcoming OCD as they all have useful advice also maybe join an OCD hoarding self help group

some valium should help on the bad days, antidepressant meds are popular and do help sometimes but IMO he is too young for one

OCD is caused by stress and anxiety so anything that relaxes him will help, consider massaging him, get a home massage book

mimi303 · 11-13-2004, 09:43 AM

Hi,

I hope you get a lot of support from people with more experience than myself. Just wanted u to know that my sister has OCD. I know it is different for everyone how it is evident. When we were growing up, she had minor obsessions, that she hid pretty well, she still doesn't tell me what she does, I think the idea of others being aware of it would probably cause more anxiety and make it worse. I do know she had to place her cup in the exact same spot twice in a row and would do this until it was just right, the cup would get placed about 15 times. This appeared to be no problem to onlookers because a lot of people fidget with stuff. She was probably 14, and much aware of the need to be discreet, and able to, but I know it still caused her tremendous anxiety. I'm sure she has other obsessions that she keeps to herself. I do know about one time in her car she heard a bump while driving and had the idea that it could have been someone or an animal that she hit (part of her knew this was irrational to the circumstances) she circled that block over an hour checking it out before she allowed herself to go home.

My son has PDD and ADD. I know how theraputic it is for me to read about other peoples stories. I hope you know your not alone, and your son is so lucky to have you. I can tell your a good advocate for him already by your comment about your husband.

Take care,
Meggie

druth · 11-13-2004, 10:55 AM

Thanks so much Meggie and Hry33. My son has not actually been diagnosed yet, but I do believe it's ocd. I spoke with a psychologist on the phone who said it did sound like it but of course he needs to see him first. Right now my son is crying his eyes out because his Dad walked on his area rug (In front of my 9 yr olds bed). I got him to stop crying by brushing off any (invisable) lint from my husbands shoes and now rolling up the rug and putting it away.

I try to be understanding but at the same time I just want to scream for him to stop all this. I can't wait for him to get help. I feel like we're all going crazy.

He is my youngest and the older siblings love to pick on him and tease him. I know this is making it worse but my older kids seem to think the younger one just wants attention. My husband thinks the same way. It's like I'm fighting this battle for him.

Anyway, thanks again for the advice. I will try and relax myself, so I can help him relax.

Still worried but we'll be okay.