Worrying,,AGAIN - Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Message Board

leonna · 02-10-2005, 09:28 AM

my dad,went out at 11:50 to take my brother somewhere,and he didnt return till 4:00.And,i was worrying incase something bad happend to him.
Then i worried,incanse,if he came back,i wouldn't be happy 2 see him,and i would of wanted something bad to happen 2 him.
but! i love my dad,so,i mean,i wouldnt of liked anything bad happening to him! so why do/did i think that!? then i worried incase i wouldnt be upset if something did happen 2 him,and its screwing me up! i feel like i should be locked up!
Im such a bad person,i love all my family,so why do i worry incase i dont , why am i so messed up.
what if this isnt ocd,what if im a psycho,and,im just making this up! im not tho,its true,but what if it isnt,what if im a psychotic weirdo.
My dad came back,with my brother and his 2 kid's.now! i love my brother,and beth and geoff * his kids* but,he has this sleeping problem,and my mum and dad have to watch his kids none stop,and i get stressed that they are stressed,and i worry incase they have a nervous breakdown.he has his kids 4days a week,and we have them here for 3 days,but today he came down 'coz he was upset over something his ex said,so we have them for 4 day's.i do love them,really.but,my brother's nearly 30,and he dosent do anything. i know he has problem's,and its real hard for him,but..i dunno! i do love my brother,but then i worry incase i dont.
what if i dont? what if one day i harm him? I WOULDNT! but,i cant stop thinking this! its killing me,

kiehn · 02-10-2005, 10:12 AM

Hang in there, first off I highly doubt you'll hurt anyone. Second if you taking a
med it doesnt sound like its working and if you not taking one you might want to
consider it or a natural supplement like choline/inositol. 500-1000mg Inositol has shown to be very helpful for OCD and considering it's just a food supplement it can't hurt. If you cant or dont like taking antidpressants you could also try a natural
antidpressant such as "SAM-e" another food supplement. There are also books
out of OCD, I just read one call "The Imp of the mind" If your interested try ****
for a cheap copy. It was helpful. Take Care, K

leonna · 02-10-2005, 11:56 AM

ooh thank you,you DOUBT Ill hurt someone,gives me lots of confidence.lol..
But seriously,i know i couldnt,i would rather die then hurt anyone.
but,with whatever the hell i have,it seem's to like making me doubt everything.
probley once every week i have a good day,then i have ok days,then near the weekend it mostly is,i have BAD bad days.
Im on anti depressent's,but not for whatever i have,but 'cos i have been suffering from panic attacks,and i wouldnt go outetc.
I have a doctor,who come's out to see me,he knows about this kinda,but,he hasnt said what he think's it is,so really im lost.
u know,just to have a name to put to it,would help.
Im so scared.madly.
i have had this,for 2years+ now,and at first,i thought maybe it was just normal teenage thoughts,then it got worse,and i had morbid thoughts,so i thought maybe i was just losing my mind,WHICH is also something i obsess about! Im scared stiff of going mental =/
but,ok im babbling on now.