pyncheone

Hey guys, I have been to at least 10 psychiatrists and counselors in the past, but have never been diagonosed with anything more than mild depression. I haven't seen a doctor in years becuase it doesn't seem to do any good. This is the problem I'm having, and I was wondering if it sounds like OCD or if anyone else can relate. I sit and dwell on anything and everything I can that is negative concerning my husband. He is about as close to perfect as any man I have ever known, but I will still think up things in my head and they become real to me. If we are watching a movie with an attractive woman in it, I will envision that he is fantasizing about her and get ****ed off. When we are making love I can't even enjoy it, because I have it in my head that he is thinking of someone else to the point that is makes me physically ill.

He told me once years ago when we first started dating, that he likes cheerleading outfits. Today when I was at work, (after all of these years) it just popped in my head and I couldn't even concentrate on what I was doing for thinking about him saying that and it led to a whole other sickening string of thougts. It is constantly like this! He knows some of the extent of the way I feel about things and is so sweet and tries to be accomodating, but I just keep getting worse. I feel like I am going out of my mind. I can't even function anymore like a normal person. He does nothing to make me think these things I do, but they are still stuck in my mind. I'm sorry this is so long. I just wanted to give a general idea, but this is just the tip of the iceburg. I could go on for hours about all of the twisted thoughts in my head. Does this sound like OCD? Or does anyone else have these kinds of thought patterns about their spouse? Thanks alot for listening. My apologies for sounding so psychotic...