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Old 08-17-2005, 07:37 PM   #1
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Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

I was wondering if others suffering from OCD experience something like this.
Do you ever find that your thoughts become automatic? I do. Let me explain,
I have been suffering with OCD for about 6 months now. In the early stages I found that my thoughts were very troublesome and they still are. Over the past few months I have found that my thoughts have started to become automatic in the sense that I have the urge to have the thought and I am right there with the counterpunch to neutralize it. Other times,I know I am going to have the thought so I have the thought on purpose just so I can nuetralize the bad thought with a good thought. In other words I just have the terrible thought on purpose and run it on with a good thought even though I don't like it nor do I get any pleasure from it. Does that make sense? It's like I have the thought on purpose and then put a good thought at the end all automatically. The brain then takes over and runs with this thought and repeats it over and over again. It's ususally in the form of a question where I have to pick between god or the devil. It's stupid I know but it's like automatic where it is programed. I was just wondering if this is another tactic of OCD and if others experience this or if it's just me. I hope this made sense.

 
Old 08-18-2005, 01:32 PM   #2
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Re: Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

I never have the thought on purpose, but if you mean that you can feel an obsession coming on, then yes, I've experienced this. Sometimes, I know that I'm going to have an obsession, even though I don't know what it will be (usually is a blasphemous one), and sometimes I can divert it before I have it, and other times, I can't stop it. This usually happens only when I obsess all day long, which occurs a couple days each month.
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Old 08-19-2005, 05:59 AM   #3
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Re: Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

The worst part of this disorder is that rational people can not control irrational thought.

AL

 
Old 08-19-2005, 01:36 PM   #4
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Re: Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

I don't think I have the thought so much on purpose. It's not that I want to have it. It's like I am not satisfied until I get it just right so I keep having it. I have the thought so that I can put God at the end of the thought and so that God always is on top, even though God is and always was on top. It's so irrational. I feel I have to continue to keep having some these thoughts (and it's only a few) until I have "neutralized" it enough or at least until I feel right. If that makes any sense? Of course, that's just it with OCD, it doesn't make sense. Yes, I also have these thoughts when I feel the obsession coming on.

 
Old 08-19-2005, 01:55 PM   #5
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Re: Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

Sure, it does. It just sounds as if you use your neutralizing mental compulsion in conjunction with the classic "feels right" syndrome. (I knew you would never think the obsession on purpose- no OCD-er tortures themselves that much! We want to keep our obsessions away! It just sounds like you described it that way because the real truth sounds so ridiculous. I've described some of my OCD symptoms in a different way for the same reason.) That sounds perfectly normal to me, especially the part about having God "on top." I don't do this with my blasphemous obsessions, but I always arrange books, CD's, DVD's, etc in a specific order, from my all-time favorite to least favorite. It's like if I change one, it's as if I'm hurting their feelings or something... The "best" must always go on top- this is why it's taking me forever to pack for college!
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Last edited by GatsbyLuvr1920; 08-19-2005 at 01:56 PM.

 
Old 08-19-2005, 02:33 PM   #6
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Re: Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

I have to admit I can be pretty hard on myself because I am a perfectionist. I think that I am more on the compulsive side of OCD because it's like the thought will come and I have to go right to the compulsion to neutralize or disprove the thought through rumination. So a good way to explain it would be if the obsession isn't there I'll put it there so I can go right to the compulsion. Like somebody who washes their hands then on purpose makes them dirty again so they can wash them and make them clean. So I guess I am kind of in the league with handwashers only that I will dirty my hands up after they are clean just so I can wash them again and again. The only difference is I am trying to cleanse the mind and that won't ever happen. It's irrational but for some reason I'm not satisfied. My brain is OCD's playground. Finally, you said the "best must always go on top" Yes, Us OCDers are the best. We are the best and we are special people. We are bright people who have a quirk in the mind is all.

 
Old 08-19-2005, 07:41 PM   #7
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Re: Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

So true! I do believe that all OCD-ers have above average intelligence and beyond. There's been evidence that our brains show this: as we enter adulthood, our brain goes through a process where excess brain cells that aren't needed are discarded. It seems that we lack this "pruning," and we never lose the excess. Therefore, we have significantly more gray matter (brain cells) than white matter (protective covering-dura- and connective tissue), so we simply think too much! Only someone whose brain was highly analytical and sharp could get caught into the "what-if" trap!
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Old 08-20-2005, 02:56 PM   #8
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Re: Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

Very true, we are also creative thinkers, we have to be to come up with such elaborate rituals to combat our unwanted thoughts.

 
Old 08-21-2005, 09:15 AM   #9
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Re: Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

Wow, that sounds just like me! i always feel like there is way too much in my mind! My thoughts go off on all these crazy, abstract tangents all the time, but i have to think them all the way through to some end. I've always felt like i think differently from so many others. It drives me nuts! i think that's why i like being a student, though - writing essays forces me to put ideas into order and make sense of my thoughts on them.

 
Old 08-21-2005, 02:08 PM   #10
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Re: Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

Yes, I know it doesn't take much to set my mind off on all kinds of crazy thoughts. My brain can make a mountain out of a molehill so to speak. I know what you mean about having to think things all the way through to the end. My brain has to come to a logical conclusion and be 100% sure. OCD absolutely loves this and feeds on this because it can always throw the "what if" question at you. Though I am making strides in this area, OCD is tough and I have to realize that it will never be perfect and you will never be 100% sure on some things.

 
Old 08-21-2005, 04:06 PM   #11
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Re: Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

i haven't read all the replys, i hope i'm not
repeating something.

i will call up the thoughts in my head to see how well
i can dismiss them as ridiculous. is this what you mean.

it's like i'm testing my anxiety level by how quick i can
neutralize...or not entertain those thoughts.

am i making sense?

kris

 
Old 08-21-2005, 04:44 PM   #12
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Re: Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

Yes, Yes, Yes, That makes perfect sense. It's like you said, I will dial up the thoughts just to see how quick I can dismiss them as not being true. The way you explained it hit the nail right on the head and I was wondering if there were others who experienced this as well. In reading your response apparently I am not. Thank you.

 
Old 08-21-2005, 10:26 PM   #13
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Re: Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

man good luck! i have thoughts odd ones alot and i think of sex alot when i look at women (but im single its ok i feel i feel i wouldnt if i was dating) so i dont know ! are you taking meds?

 
Old 10-11-2005, 06:53 PM   #14
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Re: Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

Quote:
Originally Posted by TakeThatOCD
In the early stages I found that my thoughts were very troublesome and they still are.
.......
Other times,I know I am going to have the thought so I have the thought on purpose just so I can nuetralize the bad thought with a good thought. In other words I just have the terrible thought on purpose and run it on with a good thought even though I don't like it nor do I get any pleasure from it. Does that make sense? It's like I have the thought on purpose and then put a good thought at the end all automatically. The brain then takes over and runs with this thought and repeats it over and over again. It's ususally in the form of a question where I have to pick between god or the devil. It's stupid I know but it's like automatic where it is programed. I was just wondering if this is another tactic of OCD and if others experience this or if it's just me. I hope this made sense.
Hey I get that too... sometimes I have a question in my head that asks me if I want to go to hell or heaven? If I do something I will go straight to the devil blah blah blah..and it always repeats in my head whenever I have to make a decision to do something or not.

And I also get that counter thought... I think a good thought so that the bad thought will be cancelled out and I will feel good about myself..

This would occur more when I was younger, particularly in my teens.

You just need to tell yourself to snap out of it... that's what I did

 
Old 10-11-2005, 07:50 PM   #15
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Re: Do you find your thoughts become automatic?

i also HAVE to arrange my coins with heads all facing one direction, tails facing the other, when piled on top of each other, and from lowest of value to highest of value...
i get this funy thought that if i don't have it in order then something bad is gonna happen lol

 
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