Is this Pure O or am I schizo? - Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Message Board

chloe1026 · 02-07-2007, 07:02 PM

For the past couple of months I have become obsessed that I am developing schizophrenia. I think about it constantly. I obsess about whether I am going to start hearing voices or start having hallucinations, which I have had neither of. I think things like what if I start believing the tv is talking to me or some other cuckoo stuff like that. I think about it over and over and over again. I worry if I will become crazy especially in public and do something to embarass myself. I have had thoughts like this all my life. What if I become a serial killer? What if I become a pedophile? What if I have multiple personalities? I guess what I am asking is can OCD deteriorate into schizophrenia? I am scared out of my mind. Have given myself some doozies of panic attacks over this. I don't know what I would do without my xanax sometimes. My shrink just put me on Zoloft and I am also wondering if it's going to help. I heard that if your worry about thoughts like this its most likely obession rather than delusion. Thoughts? Please....

cray324 · 02-07-2007, 08:13 PM

chloe you are not alone..Everything you said parallels my thoughts. I was scared to death that i too was going to become schizophrenic and i still am scared.I catch myself trying to see if im seeing things, like if i see something out of the corner of my eye ill take a double take and start freaking out lke omg am i starting to hallucinate?? I would venture to say too that you have pure O though i would recommend that you seek a professionals opinion to put your mind at ease<~~~yea i know doesnt happen!! if you go through alot of the posts on here you will see that alot of people who suffer from pure o are petrified like us that they have schizophrenia. This website honestly is the only thing that helps me stay positive, just know that you are not alone and if you ever need help support is always around
Take care!!

chloe1026 · 02-07-2007, 08:16 PM

Thanks for the affirmation cray. You sound just like me. I do the double takes too. My psychiatrist says it ocd. I'm trying to trust him but you know how it goes. I really hope the zoloft works. It just feels better to know that I am not alone on this.

ocdengineer · 02-07-2007, 09:27 PM

It is called Pure O. I have the same thing unfortunately. I have found over the 20 plus years of having this disease that there are some major things that help. Number one is keeping your mind busy. Read a book or when you have a thought do something productive. It gets a lot of house work done and you also keep your mind occupied. This is a quick fix though and won't last. What you really need to do is practice meditation. It helps you relax and also teaches you how to focus the untrained mind and you can actually train your mind to dismiss the thoughts so well that they may hardly exist for you anymore. It is very difficult, but well worth the effort. I had to take Xanax to stop the panic long enough to be able to start practicing, but the Xanax did not get rid of the thoughts. It just made me more relaxed. So, I started meditation and it has helped a lot. I rarely have obsessive thoughts anymore, but I still struggle with minor anxiety sometimes. I will probably always have my good days and bad days. I am young and have a lot of stressors in my life right now, so Xanax and meditation are keeping me afloat.

There is a thread on meditation below you should read. Also do some research into the subject. You will immediately see how it can be beneficial.

Good luck,
OE