OCD or Something Else - Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Message Board

ChanceFL · 05-29-2007, 12:31 PM

Okay, I recently posted about my guilty feelings, but now I have moved on to something new. Actually, it's not new because I posted about this symptom two years ago, but now it's back. It's hard for me to explain the feeling, but it started from a fear of death, then grew into "what's the meaning of life," to a new feeling of just not feeling satisfied and feeling like my life is pointless and I obsess over this thought constantly. Whenever I start thinking about the future, I get really depressed and anxious at the thought.

Now I'm worried that I am bipolar or have a personality disorder or something. Has anyone ever had any obsessions like these? Are these just more intrusive thoughts or is it something else? I feel like I am going crazy!

seaturtle · 05-29-2007, 07:40 PM

Hi,

I can't really answer if it's something else or not, but it sounds to me as if you are really depressed, for one thing. Are you on meds, do you see a professional?

I have had these feelings and dwelling on negatives most of my life; only thing that's helped has been medication.

Maybe the OCD part is thinking about them so much.

I hpe you can get some some help and that you feel better.

ChanceFL · 05-29-2007, 08:58 PM

Seaturtle, thanks for the reply. I just started seeing a psychologist, but I don't see her until Thursday and I didn't have the feeling last week. I am seeing a psychiatrist tomorrow for the first time in 7 years, so I am going to talk about these new issues. I actually wrote what I am feeling down in case I leave something out during my appointment. I am so scared about going back on meds after my last experience, but I am willing to try anything to feel better at this point. And you're absolutely right-I am really depressed. But after doing some research on bipolar, I'm not sure I get manic, so maybe it's not bipolar. Hopefully I'll get some positive reinforcement tomorrow.

seriousperson · 05-29-2007, 10:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChanceFL

...I am so scared about going back on meds after my last experience, but I am willing to try anything to feel better at this point. ....

That's exactly where I was at when I went back on meds for the first time in 30 years. The side effects still bother me -- 2 years after going on them. But it's still better than being without the meds.

And your thoughts and symptoms are very familiar to me. I always thought I was just depressed. Now I understand the OCD role in the depression.

kotitka · 06-04-2007, 11:34 AM

Oh, me too now. I am having surgery soon, and I am having horrible thoughts. I don't know where to go from here.