jealousy/suspicion - symptom of relationship OCD? - Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Message Board

divalou · 08-30-2007, 09:34 AM

hi there;
i have suffered from OCD, infact thats how i fond this place looking up why i was having these horrible thoughts/doubts about my bf! I got over that and love him completely, hes amazing and i trust him 100%. He would never cheat on me and couldnt lie to me and i believe that totally.

However, recently i have become really suspicious, want to know who he's talking to on the phone, if i notice he's made a new girl friend on *******/facebook (i know its sad) i wanna know who she is, how does he know her etc! most of the time i dont say it out loud but i catch myself sometimes getting really suspicious or jealous! I dont know why, he spends loads of time with me, we'd be together 24/7 if we could. he treats me like i deserve, he is great and funny and everything i love. so why am i getting suspicious? these thoughts just pop into my head out of the blue "who's he talking to, why hasnt he text me back".
today i jsut drove past him in his works van and he was on the fone so didnt notice me and instantly a thought flashed through my mind "he's on the fone to another woman"!!! as if!
also i seem to get really jealous of the women he works with, even the cleaner, and i feell soo sooo sooo bad because he is not like that, he wouldnt know how to flirt if his life depended on it.
i was really badly hurt in my last relationship, was cheated on repeatedly and quite blatantly and even tricked into believing that i'd even cheated, which i never. i thought tho that it hadnt affected this relationship as ive been with him almost a year now and have never felt jealous or insecure until now.
is this a symptom of relationship OCD?
thanks

w

azartoc · 08-30-2007, 11:29 AM

I have ROCD and I have had this kind of reactions, in my case it comes and goes depending of my OCD mood. I think it is OCD because you say you have one year with him and never had this jealous problem, and he hasnt done anything to justifiy this, so it is not your personality itself, i think it is the disorder . In my case I have never been a jealous guy until now (but only for episodes).

All OCD mut be attacked the same way, we must learn to live with the uncertainty, and just say to the OCD "I dont know!!!"

divalou · 09-15-2007, 12:27 PM

thanks for the reply.
Do you also find that if you speak to another guy/girl that thoughts of cheating go through your mind? i mean like last night i was talking to a guy that i know an dall of a sudden i was thinking "does he want to kiss me" "does that mean i awnt to kiss him?" "i want to kiss himn dont i i want to cheat on my boyfriend" and then after felt really guilty! i'd mnever cheat on my bf and there is noone who even compares to him and like i said before our relationship is great i can fault it. so why these thoughts, do you think its my OCD? I always really worry whenever i talk to a guy, especially good looking ones that i'll liek "accidently" chet on my bf or something or that i fancy this bloke.
it might not help that in myu previous relationship (which was horrible and i was cheated on repeatedly and convinced that i'd cheated when i never) i wasnt allowed to talk to anyone and if i did i was accused of cheating or fancying them.

azartoc · 09-17-2007, 01:10 PM

Remember OCD can be whatever thought that bothers you and is sticked in your mind, producing anxiety, sadness, depression or just discomfort.
I have read this kind of cheating obession, and yes when i see a beautiful girl i think about cheating my wife, but i know i wouldnt do it, it is just OCD.-

isitme · 09-19-2007, 02:56 AM

It sounds to me like you are in fear of your boyfriend cheating just because your last one did. Accept that your past relationship was bad and leave it, (him) in the past. It sounds like you've made a healthy choice with your present boyfriend. Once a person has been treated poorly, it is only natural to be suspicious in another relationship. It does take time to trust again. Did a specific incident occur in this relationship to make you suspicious, ie, a similar encounter to what has happened with the x?