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You know we all have tough times at work and I was in social services for 12 years but decided this past September to retire from the field because of the high stress, low pay, office politics, red tape, and no promotional opportunities. I would constantly worry about loosing my job because of something I said or did, and my anxiety was always high. I think my anxiety was so high because I was so worried and fearful over loosing my job. But as I've been saying, the fear that we have of the event is far worse than the actual event. I decided to leave for my own good, and when I did my OCD went nutty. Why? Well, OCD really doesn't like change, and we'll stay at a bad job or in a bad relationship because we'd rather do that than experience change in our lives. For me, I know I needed change, and I knew that my OCD wasn't going to like it, but after a month or so, my OCD began to accept the fact that I wasn't going to go running back to social services.
I actually broke down about 3 weeks ago and answered an ad in the paper for social services and went on an interview. I remember sitting there in the interview and listening to all the things that would be required of me, things I had been doing for 12 years, and I remember getting sick to my stomach because I knew I wasn't being true to myself and my decision, and I knew I was sitting there because being at a job that I didn't like, but was familiar with would be less stressful and less anxiety provoking than doing something new in my life.
Regardless to say, they never did call me, but even if they did, I would have told them that I was not going to accept the position. I have a job now with less responsibility and better pay, and I'm alot happier. The old saying that change is good is really true, but for anyone, even those without OCD, change is tough. When you throw OCD inot the mix it gets even harder.
As luck had it, the last company I left got bought out last month and basically the new company is deciding on who they want to keep and who they want to get rid of. So you see, everything works out in the end becuase even if I wouldn't have left, I most likely would have been looking for another job anyway.
Don't get upset, just tell yourself that this is your life and you need to do what's best for yourself, and sitting idly by while other's mess with the company is something you're not willing to do. Take control of what's going on, and make decisions that are going to better your life.
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