Feel like i need to be in a mnetal institution!!! - Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Message Board

sh 08 · 12-16-2008, 12:22 AM

I have been on celexa for 5 yrs now and it worked wonders BUT it seems every so often my ocd and other panic strikes me for a period of time and then one day i wake up "normal" again!! my ocd is different than common ones,i ocd over what ifs especaiily with health problems,even though theres no reason!!! if i have a cough to me its lung cancer,a bad back cancer,a bruise some sort of blood problems and the list goes on!! i have always been funny getting medical treatments like the norm ones, needles and such, but lately WAS much better shrugging it off, biting the bullet and just doing it,whereas beforei wouldnt go out of fear of the unknown even though i know what known is lol!so i have been really good at facing my fears until this last week! i found as time has gone by and ive matured im able to put little things that were big to me into perspective,now im not again! i have constant shots of adrenaline going through me all day,scared of nothing, obsessing about my health for now reas reason and feel as though i need to scream!i feel scared all the time when i am in a car it looks like every car is going to hit us and kill us...every person around me is going to do something to me,ive become moody in an angry way and i am not content like i normally am...im on edge feeling like a bomb is about to drop,like someone close to me or even me is going to die or get hurt really bad,but for no reason! i obsess about it all day long!! i know its this time of year but dont feel it is stress related as my life hasnt changed but my thoughts have once again!!! i cant seem to shake this nervousness and powerlessness out of my head! i have a dentist appt and the dr gave me a few ativan now i took one tonight and felt in tune somewhat with myself again,not high or anything just mentally balanced....i go through this phase 1-2x a year lasts about 2 months then im fine again...i hate this!!! i dont want to see my dr to ask for more meds because i dont want him to think im someone who is a junky or something but really feel it could help during this phase but if says no it will make me feel like he is thinking that!is there anything i can do to help myself?

MissyS · 12-22-2008, 08:30 AM

I know how you feel! My thoughts are different- but still intrusive and scary. What you are going through is very common with OCD. OCD tends to "spike" and then go into remission for a while. I can go a couple years w/ nothing and then... boom, I'll spend a couple months in hell. It really stinks. Do you see a Psychiatris? Or does your regular physician monitor your meds? When I have a flare up of my OCD I make sure to see my therapist and I also rely on small doses of Klonopin to get me through really anxious periods. It's not uncommon. Do yourself a favor, and see your doctor. He won't think you're a junkie!