After reading a few threads on this website i think i have just diognosed myslef with OCD, am i right? I constantly have terrible thoughts about doing stuff which i would'nt dream of telling half of it. I have always been a bit weird.
This is the first time i have talked about this. I am now 27 and have uncontrolable thoughts which are pretty much repetative allday from the moment i wake up. I wish so badly that i could fall asleep and never wake. Many of the thoughts are what i have heard or seen through out my life from either something someone has said or done or something i have seen.
I would never in a million years carry out or want to say any of the things i think, but i just cant stop them from going over and over in my head, i am obsessed with certain horrible thoughts and it's driving me crazy. I have recently lost my job which was the best job i have ever had, and i have slowly gone mad over a period of time which in turn has made me have to see pysciatrists and be put on amisulpride, i thought i was being spiked with stuff in my food and drinks and to cut a long story short i had pyscosis for many months and believed it was all happening for real.
I feel well to a degree and understand that i was ill, but now i can't stop these thoughts from going round and round in my head which has been happening for years and has now got to the point where i can't deal with it any more. For a few minutes of the day my head feels like it is clear but not for long.
I don't dream when i'm asleep about any of the bad stuff i think during the day which is why i know i would'nt do or say any of the stuff i think. I have normal dreams somtimes happy ones, dont really have nightmares. I used to pray when i was younger and got scared if i didnt, i stopped for many years but have recently started again. I do this in my head and not out loud.
Please help, can i see a councillor or therapist to stop these repetative horrible thoughts.