Re: will this horror ever end???
The thoughts aren't you, that's why they stick in your mind. I remind myself that it's anxiety that causes us to have these thoughts that don't make logical sense. Remember that OCD is your minds solution to anxiety and stress, it gets you obsessed with thoughts that scare you. What you have to try and do is work out what may be stressing you, and work towards relieving that stress somehow, and eventually the thoughts will subside, the thoughts themselves aren't the problem and can be anything you hate. You're not evil at all, as the previous post said you wouldn't be worried to death by the thoughts and fear them if you were. There is an end, it won't feel like it right now but there is. The great thing about the human mind is that it's great at forgetting bad times when you let it, getting through the hard times is obviously the hard part. A few years ago I went through some of the worst times in my life with OCD, and thought there was no way out. People sing about time being a healer, but with this I found it true, just hang in there.