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xmindjailx · 07-17-2010, 08:41 PM

I'm totally in love with my current boyfriend. But idk why but sometimes I get bored and I start looking at my ex's facebook.
For the past few days I've been getting really paranoid that I might still be in love with him or something. He and I had a really terrible break up so it kind of just ended. So I'm afraid after all this time (about 2 years) I've been suppressing my love for him.
It all started when I saw a picture of him and I thought 'he's actually very cute". And i felt sooo guilty. And for the past few nights I've been having dreams that I reunite with him and we talk and stuff. And that we still like each other or whatever.
You just watch those stupid movies where people see their first love again and they fall for them and realize that they never stopped loving them.

I love my current boyfriend sooo much. He means a lot to me and I'm more in love with him then I was with the ex.

I just feel so guilty about having these thoughts about my ex. I'm afraid that I'm still in love with him!!
Plus i feel sooo guilty and I feel like i have to tell my boyfriend. And it would crush him

please help!!!!

xmindjailx · 07-17-2010, 08:44 PM

LOLOLOOL okay so i realized that blurred out F ACE B Ook
and it looks like i wrote something really perverted!! omg that was a good laugh but in all seriousness...HELP!!

recovering · 07-19-2010, 02:50 PM

I had dreams about someone I had dated; the dreams lasted for 8 years. At first, I told my husband, who at the time was my fiance and we prayed that it would go away but it never did. After being so tired of this I took a good look at the guy (who he was, not literally) and realized he never grew up and even if I wasn't with my husband I definately wouldn't want anything to do with this guy. I think the ROCD didn't have that feeling to throw in my face so it finally went away. Also, I realized that my relationship with my husband was growing much more than anything that I had ever had in the short time I knew that guy. Probably one of the things that helped me was knowing that dating right after a break up is not a good idea; you should take 8 months to 1 year to get yourself together and not be vulnerable. I also understand that everyone has flaws and that I should accept normal human behavior and not nit pick about minor things like bodily functions or what someone's wearing etc. I was so relieved when I found out that I have ROCD and now I know for sure it wasn't a real feeling.

comesandgoes21 · 12-09-2010, 07:58 AM

hey recovering how was it for u, the obsessed with thinking you like someone but u really dont for 8 years were u and ur fiance in a long distance relationship? what type of things did you obsess about did you get any physiological responses due to the anxiety? did you think that you actually liked this person and sometimes go numb to ur fiance did you have any compulsions with your mouth? or a face of fear and horror? did your mind associate everything with that person?

recovering · 12-09-2010, 03:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by comesandgoes21

hey recovering how was it for u, the obsessed with thinking you like someone but u really dont for 8 years were u and ur fiance in a long distance relationship? what type of things did you obsess about did you get any physiological responses due to the anxiety? did you think that you actually liked this person and sometimes go numb to ur fiance did you have any compulsions with your mouth? or a face of fear and horror? did your mind associate everything with that person?

We lived together and were together all the time. Because I felt I made the wrong decision I would find many reasons that I didn't want to be with my husband, yes husband. I told him that I was having dreams of this person and it won't go away, I told him I loved him and asked him to pray with me to make it go away. We were married shortly after and the dreams kept coming, the fantasy of leaving him for someone else kept coming but I didn't tell anyone. It caused a lot of fights between us and yes, I had many anxiety attacks. I also had the fear that my husband would leave me for someone else and that made matters worse. I feel so bad for anyone who has to go through these things and I hope they can start the healing process too. Its been a very long journey.

solid snake · 12-14-2010, 10:43 AM

Hi there, these is my story:

Hi there.
Has you must know, having a crush on other person is a natural thing even for those who are in love whit their partner.

I have a situation here: I like another girl, i think she is really preaty, funny and smart. Now, my head is aaaalways telling me that it is not just an atraction, but it is something else, that it is REAL LOVE.

I use to have ROCD, which i got over but now whit these obsessive idea it came back again. Now "I AM AFRAID OF LOVING ANOTHER AND THAT I NEVER LOVED MY GIRLFRIEND".

My head is always comparing my gf whit the other girl, and i am always like:

-"She is smarter than my gf"
-"She is skinnier than my gf"
-"I wish my gf dance like her"
-"I wish my gf use the same clothe"
-"I wish my gf has the same friends"

Has you guys can see, it sucks.

----

I am always cheking at her facebook to see what i feel, beliveme...i understand you.

PS: All started whit physical comparations.

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