Cornholio

Dear Friends and sufferers of OCD,

I feel like a freak! I have a terrible fear of mayonnaise. Does anyone else in the universe have this phobia???? I feel so lost and so very very alone.


I think I may have discovered the reason why I have this strange phobia. I remember when I was about ten years old, I was being watched over (babysat if you please) by a friend's grandma. At that age, I ate mayonnaise quite regularly. We were talking about food. She was talking about Hot-dogs. She asked me "What do you put on Hot-dogs?". I answered to her that I liked Mayonnaise on my Hot-dogs....and guess what she said- she said that that was "disgusting". I think that this seemingly innocuous comment may have contributed to my fear of mayonnaise! What do you think?

I am so sick and tired of this stupid phobia. It has caused to much pain and suffering in my life. I can't eat out at fast food restaurants at all- I can't go to Burger King, Wendy's, McDonalds, Checkers, or KFC. I also have a fear of Tartar sauce, because it is made from mayonnaise isnt it? I also have fears of fried foods, such as fish and chicken. I miss eating those foods. It has been 5 or six years since I ate anything like hamburgers from McDonalds. I miss eating that food. I wish that God would take away my phobias. I am so very tired of suffering. Because of my fears, I freak out if I am at my college or in public and I see a cup from Wendys or any other fast food place. I get very anxious, and the muscles in my chest tighten up painfully, because I think to myself "What if that person who had that drink ate something with mayonnaise on it?". I wash my hands 50 times a day, and I sometimes take several baths every day. It is difficult for me to go out into public places, including my college. I am so jaded. I am exhausted and confused. Why do I have this fear? Why?

I think that I advocate the "False Alarm" theory- this theory states that people with OCD have a sudden feeling of dread and fear, and it is all because of distorted perceptions of the world. I fear mayonnaise as if it were something that would cause me harm or death. I fail to understand why I fear it so. I fear that it will get on my clothes, and make me somehow "dirty". I am afraid to get around mayonnaise- and I am scared to death of touching it. But I fear that facing it may be the only way to cure it. I may have to try "Flooding" in order to be purged from the terror I feel.

Maybe the root of this fear is subconscious- and that is why the reason why I have the fear is obscure to me.


Maybe the reason why I have this phobia is of no consequence. I just want to not be afraid anymore. I don't want to hurt myself- I just want to be normal.

Thanks for reading. I am embarassed to admit my phobias so openly. Be that as it may, I felt the impulse to share my story. God bless you all.

Sincerely,

Cornholio