As if my obsessions, derealisation, panic, depression and anxiety were'nt enough, something else had to pop in my mind today, giving me more justification that I'm going insane.
I was subconsiously fooling with my two front teeth, just tapping them with my fingers and whatnot, when I had the urge to put pressure on them with my bottom teeth as hard as I could. I pushed them so hard that now they're sore and I even heard a popping noise when I did it.
What the hell is wrong with me? Why would I do this? Now I can't stop fooling with them and I'm scared to death that I'll push them so hard that I'll knock them out... I know it's extremely odd but I've always had a weird thing with teeth... I find the prospect of this happening so frightening.
And if it DID happen, if I DID actually push them too hard, I would be so ashamed to go to the dentist and explain that I did this to myself... plus, that scares me, because what if I act on other obsessions? The fact that I am capable of doing something like this in a matter of seconds horrifies me.
So much for my medicine! It's not working at all.
Anyway, I know that none of you have gone through this specifically, but maybe you can relate to me somewhat... I'm such a freak; this OCD is a nightmare and I'm a basketcase because of it.
I need to hear SOME kind of reassurance; any words would help... thankyou for your time.
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Shannon
[This message has been edited by ShannonKay (edited 07-15-2003).]