help - recently started dating someone with ocd
I have recently (well 7 mo's off and on now) started being more serious/dating a guy who has been for the most part open to me about the fact that he has ocd - though i am not sure exactly what kind. he does a lot of hand washing, so i believe germs are a huge issue (he's quite afraid of sex & std's as well) and he HATES people touching him or being in his "space" and seems to have a lot of social anxiety. That being said we started dating back in may and then he got some anxiety and disappeared for a couple of months. Then recently we ran back into each other and things have started up again. This time though he seems to be a little more open about things and keeping his "issues" in mind i have been patient and it has been paying off, he doesn't seem to mind me touching him in public and even instigates the PDA (with me but still can't stand others to touch him), is much more open in talking with me and his overall comfortableness has been increasing and it's been great.
Now I feel like there has been a set back and I don't know how best to handle/resolve it without disrupting all the progress we have made - we have been trying to set aside some time to have that "talk" (he works out of town during the week) but it hasn't happened yet. This past Sunday we were watching football & the local sports bar with friends and guys will be guys and they made a point of embarrassing him in public over what our "status" is/was and i could just see the anxiety wash over his face like a flood and now he has shut down with me and the 5 steps forward has felt like 10 steps back because he has taken that nice bit of social anxiety and disappeared from all communication. I tried a nice sweet voicemail & text which elicited NO response. He really is a great guy that I like a lot and I can be as patient as I need to be with him & his OCD. I just don't want to push the wrong buttons and send him to the black abyss
any input would be greatly appreciated!!