Last June I met my girlfriend and we hit it off quite well. She had a drinking problem because she was horribly depressed, and we used to get drunk quite a lot. Anyway, our relationship started out nice and even though she was afraid of having sex (due to pregnancy) she would go out of her way and try because she loved me. We used to change and see each other naked all the time without any awkwardness, but in the last couple months that has all changed. I'm made to leave the room when she changes, and not only is she still scared of sex, she doesn't even want to try it with me. I brought these things up recently, and after some talking she said that she's been wrestling with thoughts that she didn't feel romantic love for me anymore. She says she loves me intensely as a person but not in the same way that she used to. I suggested that we break up because I didn't want to be stuck in a one sided relationship. She said that she doesn't want anything to change between us. Oddly enough she still wants to kiss me on the lips, she still wants to lay in bed with me, and she still says "I love you".
I've talked to her about the possibility that it's ROCD, and we've decided that even if it is, her feelings are real to her and we can't really change them.
She's diagnosed with OCD and Depression, and given that she mentioned that the thought of falling out of love with me caused her anxiety I figured there was a possibility of this being ROCD. Did breaking up with her validate her thoughts? Is there any chance that she'll fall in love with me again? Or am I just desperate to blame this on mental illness?
Last edited by cretinousfool; 04-27-2011 at 01:29 PM.
If the thoughts she is having keep returning and she has been diagnosed with OCD then it is just OCD that Is bothering her. OCD can turn peoples lives and feelings and thoughts upside down.
There is a book made for you, the partner of the sufferer of Rocd, called "sleeping with Rocd". Google it you can buy it online. It is very helpful helping you understand how powerful OCD really is. It can explain why she has Rocd, treatment, and things like that
If the thoughts she is having keep returning and she has been diagnosed with OCD then it is just OCD that Is bothering her. OCD can turn peoples lives and feelings and thoughts upside down.
There is a book made for you, the partner of the sufferer of Rocd, called "sleeping with Rocd". Google it you can buy it online. It is very helpful helping you understand how powerful OCD really is. It can explain why she has Rocd, treatment, and things like that
Buying a book like that will just make me feel desperate and pathetic. As much as I'd like to understand what's going on, there's still the very real possibility that she just doesn't have feelings for me anymore. :/
Buying a book like that will just make me feel desperate and pathetic. As much as I'd like to understand what's going on, there's still the very real possibility that she just doesn't have feelings for me anymore. :/
Nevermind, I bought the book and am skimming through it. I quoted a few passages of it and sent it to my "ex". She's pretty smart and rational and has been able to understand that some of her feelings are the result of her symptoms so maybe this will help.
EDIT:
Read some more, and I feel pretty empowered. Sure, it sort of seems desperate that I would turn to a book and blame a breakup on a mental illness but I'm at least going to try this before I admit that it's truly over. I think I'm going to give her some space (which will be easy since I work most days within these coming weeks) and talk to her about getting help.
Last edited by cretinousfool; 04-27-2011 at 03:48 PM.
Does my girlfriend have ROCD? 
