I have been diagnosed by a physiatrist with OCD and Anxiety but i'm sure it's not just that and I think i have schizophrenia. I have been to see my physciatrist about 4 times and each time he has said I don't have Schizophrenia.
However when i first looked up the symptoms of schizophrenia and read the ones where schizophrenic people believe their thoughts are controlled by others and that aliens have taken over the world- i thought to myself no way do i believe that. But after months of thinking about these symptoms - I think i have become delusional. I have began to wonder - what if people are plotting to get me, what if everyone is out to get me, what if my family are out to get me, what if my cat is an alien what if my ipod is an alien. I've also wondered what if it's not really me talking when i talk to others, I've also wondered what if my thoughts are controlled by others. I've even questioned if I have special abilities. These thoughts all make me very anxious and from time to time when i don't feel anxious I can say to myself no these thoughts are ridiculous and let them go but lately i think I have almost been believing them and when I do feel that way I feel delusional. I'm not sure if these are intrusive thoughts or delusional thoughts but I just wish they would go away - If i was delusional would I actually worry more about the actually thought than the fact that I have had the thought? Please help me. I hope I don't have Schizophrenia
Hey Tigger, no you are not schizophrenic, I know this because you are self aware of what is schizophrenia. An schizophrenic really believes in its delusions. In the other hand you are obsessed with that disorder and fear about being an schizophrenic ( I also thought i had schizophrenia but it was my OCD) . You suffer from OCD, your obsessions revolve on being a schizophrenic, but that doubt that you feel is what OCD is al about. If you are already getting therapy I encourage you to keep attending to. One important thing that I had learned in my CBT therapy to cope with OCD, is to label, those thoughts or doubts that revolve over your obsession, like OCD and not your own just let them go through like they are not your own.
Hope this helps and believe in your self and don't let doubt take over your live.
Train of Thought
Wow. I can relate to that a lot. It's so funny how other medical problems seem completely certain (I am having a psychotic break/am hallucinating this experience; I am having a stroke; I have a brain tumor; I am having a heart attack) but the idea that my problem is really just anxiety and obsession just doesn't sound as convincing. I got an EKG once and there was nothing wrong with my heart. I've been told by a mental health professional that I'm not schizophrenic at least half a dozen times. It never makes me feel any less that I am.
I guess that's what makes me sick. I can't see my problem on my own and I can't help myself. It seems like the things I obsess about are getting worse as I get older. Fear of being schizophrenic and the other hypochondriacal issues are only part of it. I also experience very distressing obessions about what I might do.
It's good to finally know what my problem is, but I still completely lack power over them. Its like I can never see them arising and I dont recognize how wound up I am until my chest is as tight as a drum and I feel like I just can't be around people anymore.
I am going for an intake/evaluation in three weeks (the soonest they could see me; I set up the appointment two months ago). I really need some ways to deal with this. It always eventually peaks and subsides, but it also always comes back. I used to drink really bad over it and I used to think about killing myself daily because of it. I've been sober for a long time now and I'm hardly suicidal at all anymore, but I really want this to end. Even though my life isnt as bad as it used to be, it's still very,very hard.
I had very similar "symptoms" so I thought. When I was struggling to figure out what was wrong with me, it was during therapy and I had made a bit of a mistake by reading about all the mental disorders in a psychiatry text book. In that state of mind, it is easy to match pretty much many of the symptoms of any disorder to your own experience.
My issue at the time was I knew my actions (obsessions/compulsions) were not normal and I couldn't figure why I was experiencing this. I was afraid I was losing my mind (all the while knowing checking the stove over and over again didn't make sense when clearly I knew it was off). It's strange disorder.
When I was on this journey of discovering the issue, schizophrenia was the one disorder that frightened me the most and yet therefore the one that I obsessed about the most. Even though I didn't really match the criteria or all the symptoms.
So I was diagnosed with OCD after a year of therapy. Therapy is probably what you need. Are you getting help?