Controlling Thoughts - Would Like Input
For awhile I've thought of myself as having OCD. I don't really talk about it with anyone and I'm pretty good at hiding it. When I'm alone, or have a lot of downtime is usually when my thoughts become rapid and I almost feel like my mind is running a movie in fastforward. It's like one memory after another almost. Some of the memories I have from my past I feel like are almost bad luck, and I immediately have to think of something else. I know that sounds really weird. These "bad luck" memories usually come from a time when I was really unhappy with pretty much everything in my life. Now, I'm very happy and content. I don't know if it's a fear of feeling so crappy again, or what. But I also feel like if I block out these older memories with new, good ones that it's keeping me in a safer zone to not fall back into that bad time again.
I also, in my mind, repeat a term, usually in multiples of 3 that i feel is somewhat lucky. If I don't get the chance to do this the way I want to, I feel very uneasy. I don't want it to start affecting my normal life. I have a great serious boyfriend, a good job and good friends/family, though I still feel anxious a lot. Are there any suggestions ( other than a therapist) that anyone might have to help ease these thoughts?? I'd really like to hear what people have to say, regardless of whether or not you've experienced something similar.