Let me start out by saying, I have never been to a professional of any kind. Could I have OCD or am I just nuts?
I look back at certain things from when I was a kid. Still to this day, I can not have my food touching other food on my plate. People laugh at me and say "it goes to the same place" I just cant do it!
I used to "collect" pampthlets whenever I'd go. I'd get really angry and get bad anxiety when said pampthlets would be thrown out. I kept these thoughts hidden from my parents. Sometimes then and now, I will have to rewrite something like a letter to someone several times until its just right. I often make lists. I kept a lot of my internal conversations and thoughts in my head. I have a hard time "turning off my brain". Sometimes my thoughts have been kinda violent and its scary. I re-read things over and over again... (I have read what I have written 4 times now to this point) That brings me to another point. I sometimes can feel as though I will have a panic attack and get really super annoyed if the volume on the TV or radio is not an even number. I'm constantly running my hands under water when they get dry. The feeling of dry hands makes me sick. I try lotion but the sliming feeling makes me cringe.
Just recently, we decided to move back to Colorado from TX. Although, I am really excited about this, I have noticed my anxiety level has gone up. I can't sleep well at night because I lay and bed and think too much. UHHHHGGGG!!!
Sorry for the long post.
Hi there, quick reply sounds like it could be OCD. A symptom of OCD is intrusive thoughts (i.e. causing harm to others or self) that apparently all people have, but with OCD these thoughs just don't go away, they cause alarm and stick with us in our heads and cause stress... I have OCD and in times of stress (i.e. I am moving right now to another city) it flares up big time which I believe is also common.
I cannot shut my brain off sometimes, it's flashes of thought afte thought. You should go see someone (registered psychologist) who can help you manage and learn the tools to help better manage your symptoms. It's a real disorder and your not crazy - its your brain (not you).
It's stressful I know to be in this position - but the first step is to seek out the support you need to learn how to manage it (if it is OCD) in order to get a proper diagnosis and most importantly the help you need to get through this. It's been with me since I was a child and I thought this was just how "normal" people thought, but realized that when I had to check the oven was off multiple times (all the while knowing it was) but feeling compelled to check over and over again, that hey somethings up here.... This is not normal...
I was in my mid 20's when I finally got the courage to go talk to someone because I thought I was going crazy! It was probably one of the best decisions I've ever made over the the course of therapy I learned to recognize and better deal with the symptoms... though it never really goes away (to my experience) at least you can learn to acknowledge hey that's an OCD thought (STOP!) and try to move on from whatever it is.... it's challenging I am not going to lie, but not impossible.
Good Luck! Hope all goes well with your move. Try not to stress
Thanks for the reply! After we get moved, I plan on going to see someone.
Most recently, I have noticed that certain words have been triggering some unwanted thoughts. Like the word fire for example. uhhhhggg!!