| | help me pure-o intrusuve thoughts how do i fix this
Well I talked to a different psychiatrist today and she gave me great insight on what I could possibly be going through, all this time I thought I was delusional about a situation that took place at my brothers wedding, were I exaggerate harsh words that had been exchanged at the event. in my mind there was spitting punching and nasty personal scathing insults being thrown at me everyone hated me the brides mother had a nervous breakdown guns being pulled. fainting I always felt deep down this wasn't true,I know it was just me and my geeky brother tradeing nasty personal insults like we usually do sometimes, we have a love but but uneasy relationship he thinks he is better than me,but he knows I somewhat frown upon him and I think im much more cooler than him.
So for the last years or two I have been having these thoughts of a disasterous wedding were me and certain family members traded crushing insults with each other I mostly lost but my mother usually stepped in and sealed the deal on the attacker because she is probably the most well to do in the family. but I flash back thoughts like for instance my cousin called me a name because I yelled something nasty at my brother, she used to be very promiscuous whens she was younger so I said that's why you had 4 abortions na na na she replies I only had 4 of you lmao,great come back right just nasty but not true I envison people just ripping me down to my socks and I have no recourse and when I invison getting physical with the verbal attacker I fall short of some sorts.
But the thing is I obsesses over this situation think, talk, and sometimes get real angry and say I know if someone said that to me I would crack them real good and once or twice I had a burst of anger were I threw punches in the air pretending this is how I would have dealt with the verbal attacker.
I know deep down this didn't happen this way at all but in my mind its like what if It did I look so bad I have to do something. but the this thought takes over my life I have been miserable forever with this all night all day cant function and do things that I like. just a pure obsessive thought my ritual might be searching the web looking for answers and e-mailing my doc but im not sure what do you guys think????pure o ocd anxiety
Also,risperdal,cymbalata,abilify,effexor ,prozac,citalopram did nonthing for the obsession I have read that luvox annaferil and maybe paxil helps ocd thoughts tremendously what do you guys think what drug worked best for your obsessiveness?