Mother of two young kids needs some helpful hints. - Open to All Other Health Topics Message Board

katt_imp · 04-24-2002, 06:22 AM

Hello. I am a 27 year old mom of two young kids. I have a daughter that is 4 years old and a son that just turned 7 month on the 14th. Well I have a man in my life. He is my sons dad and he helps with my kids alot no one knows that he is not her dad. Well the thing that I need helpful hints is this. He has a job option is the state and we live in canada. He goes for 4 monthes and gets paid at the end of it all. I am nevese that when he is gone my daugther will be sad and my son will forget him. Plus I be a single mom with two kids at that time and I am not sure how to do the normally every day things I do. Like washing clothes at the mat. Right now one of us stay with the kids while the other does the washing of the clothes. Doing bath time. I bath them now but while I bathing my son my man is watching my daughter for there special time and I put my son to bed and than bath my daughter. Taking out the garabage to the aptments back garabage. I am not too sure how to do those things alone. Can anyone give me some helpful hints on what to do ? Plus for some reason I have a bad feeling about him crossing the boarder. If I tell him that he gets mad at me. Please help me.

From a mother of two great kids.

~mandy~ · 04-24-2002, 06:30 AM

It's not as overwhelming as it seems...i was a single mother of 2 kids about the same age as yours are now...they're now 3 and 7. The laundry mat can be a pain in the butt with 2 kids to drag with you, make sure you bring lots of toys for the 4 year old to keep her busy, the 7month old, bring a stroller or chair to sit in and lots of toys, snacks etc...and you may find it easier to do a few small trips durring the week rather than one big one (the shorter your there the less likely the kids will go nuts from bordom). Also, if the one you go to now isn't very kid friendly try looking around to find one that is. As far as things like bath time, i used to alternate nights, one night the baby got one, the next night the other one got one (doesn't work in the summer when they get dirtier though). You can try bathing them together, or bath the baby first, let your older one help, have all of the baby's clothes and things in the bathroom and dress him in there while the other one is playing, sit him in a chair and wash the next one. I know it seems like a lot when your not used to it, but it's not too big of a deal..i did it for almost 2 years alone so it can be done without going crazy, lol. Also...if you have any friends with kids you can trade off babysitting for things like grocery store and laundry trips...you watch theirs while they go and they watch yours while you go..this can work out great and you don't have to pay for a sitter.

katt_imp · 04-24-2002, 06:37 AM

Thanx Mandy. I will try what you have said

mlgable · 04-24-2002, 08:58 AM

Bathing should be fine for your kids if you bath your 4 year old first. Put your son in a small play thing such as a "walker" type device and let him play while you have your daughter in the tub. If you need to have a shower why not consider taking your daughter in the shower with you while you son is in the walker in the bathroom. Be sure he can't get into any trouble and that you can see him at all times while you are in the shower. Next bath your son and let your daughter help. Make it a big girl thing to help bath her little brother. Let her help as much as you can. As for going to the laundry mat........again bring something for your son to sit in and bring books as well as a non messy treat for your daughter. Make this special for her by reading to them while the clothes are in the washer and dryer. When the clothes are done let her help take them out of the dryer and mybe give her a few things to fold that are simple like some socks or a couple of towels. She may not do a good job but complement her any way and make her feel important. While your mate is gone have him write short letters to the kids or email letters so they know that he is still there and will be home soon. Have your daughter draw him pictures to send to him or help her send an email by typing what she would like to say to him. Also if there is a neighbor close to you try trading services........such as asking her to watch your kids while you go to the laundry mat or the grocery store in return for watching her kids or for baking something for her or maybe you are good at sewing or whatever. My neighbor and I used to do that often when needed.

chrissiek · 04-24-2002, 10:12 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by katt_imp:
Hello. I am a 27 year old mom of two young kids. I have a daughter that is 4 years old and a son that just turned 7 month on the 14th. Well I have a man in my life. He is my sons dad and he helps with my kids alot no one knows that he is not her dad. Well the thing that I need helpful hints is this. He has a job option is the state and we live in canada. He goes for 4 monthes and gets paid at the end of it all. I am nevese that when he is gone my daugther will be sad and my son will forget him. Plus I be a single mom with two kids at that time and I am not sure how to do the normally every day things I do. Like washing clothes at the mat. Right now one of us stay with the kids while the other does the washing of the clothes. Doing bath time. I bath them now but while I bathing my son my man is watching my daughter for there special time and I put my son to bed and than bath my daughter. Taking out the garabage to the aptments back garabage. I am not too sure how to do those things alone. Can anyone give me some helpful hints on what to do ? Plus for some reason I have a bad feeling about him crossing the boarder. If I tell him that he gets mad at me. Please help me.

From a mother of two great kids.

Why do you have a bad feeling about crossing the border?

I live in a border town and see ontario plates in our parking lots all over the downtown area. I cross into Canada all the time - there shouldn't be anything to be afraid of. If he answers the patrol guards correctly (no smart a$$ remarks), doesn't carry anything illegal and is just plain honest, there is nothing wrong.

Does he have a CANPass to cross the border if he's working? We have that in the US to Canada region where you don't have to go through customs - however the same amount of people need to be in that car all the time - like if the driver gets the pass, then he can ONLY be in the car crossing the border at all times - no extra passengers. So if you were taking a pleasure trip, you couldn't be in the car since you weren't on the application (if this all makes sense).

Christine.