concerned for my daughter - Open to All Other Health Topics Message Board

LaurenRae · 07-23-2003, 11:15 PM

My 12 year old daughter has always been a big girl. She's always been taller than other kids and heavier. Over the last 10 months she has lost nearly 70 pounds, the last 7 in just the past two weeks. I know she was too heavy before, but now she is getting so skinny! I can feel (and see!) her bones in her shoulders and when I give her a hug, I can feel her ribs sticking out. Her cheek bones are so pronounced. I took her to the doctor a few months ago, when the weight loss wasn't as much and he did some blood work on her - everything was ok. I recently took her back because in a very brief time she dropped another 20 pounds (she was also getting a lot of bruises) and he did another round of blood tests on her. Everything came back normal. The doctor told me that she is in the normal range for her height (she is about 5 feet, 6 and one half inches tall). Now she's lost some more...she looks so frail! She does seem to have enough energy during the day (she's exhausted by late evening). She just doesn't eat very much anymore - because she says she is just not that hungry. She assures me that she is not "dieting". Anyways, I was content to just let things ride for a bit but tonight she tells me that when she woke up this morning (I was already at work and she didn't show her grandma) her bottom lip was blue. This happened again around noon. She went swimming in an indoor pool this afternoon and she said her lips were blue when she got out. I should mention that today it was 32 degrees Celsius here - very hot - so it can't be because it was too cold out! I have told her that if this happens again she is to let me know right away. To make a long story short, I'm concerned. Does anyone have any ideas? Does this sound fairly normal? The blue lips thing scares me. Any comments, etc. would be so appreciated. Thanks.

neuronz-on-the-fritz · 07-24-2003, 01:52 AM

I had eating disorders for years.....do not depend on your daughter to accurately tell you what she is really doing...and 'normal' weight does not mean no problems. Docs are typically oriented at numbers and things they can see...not their fault. Take her to a specialist for an evaluation. The earlier the treatment, the more likely it is she will completely recover. I had eating disorders from the ages of 11-33- been starve/purge free for 7 years now, but went through years of hell. She's lost A LOT of weight, especially for a kid...you're absolutely right to be concerned. People with eating disorders don't usually mean to lie, but the disease/distortions are so much a part of thier lives that their truth isn't based in reality. This is a direct result of malnutrition... go with your gut; she may be ****ed off, but at least she'll be alive to be mad! The blue lip deal means she's not maintaining her own body heat properly. It's a warning sign. (I'm also a nurse, as well as recovered) Take her to a doc that knows about eating disorders.

[This message has been edited by neuronz-on-the-fritz (edited 07-24-2003).]

Jennifluffer · 07-24-2003, 12:04 PM

I agree. Please take her to a specialist that deals with eating disorders. She's lost too much weight for it to be "normal." She's had two normal blood tests which shows you she doesn't have a medical explanation for her weight loss. It sounds to me like she has an eating disorder.

Good luck!

bngreen · 07-24-2003, 02:46 PM

First off, how much does she weigh?
I also agree with the other posters. She is not going to tell you if she has an eating disorder. Another way to tell is how she looks. If she has just lost fat and not gained muscle, she will be a little flabby rather than toned with muscle. This could be a sign of an eating disorder. My sister lost a lot of weight in a short amount of time. We knew it was from exercise and diet because of how she looked. She didn't have mush muscle.
I hope she gets help before it is too late.

LaurenRae · 07-24-2003, 03:10 PM

Thank you everyone for your replies. To answer your question, bngreen, she now weighs 123. She was up to 195 at her heaviest. She is a little flabby - not really toned. Especially in her arms and legs. I know the weight of 123 sounds like it should be ok - but it just doesn't seem like enough on her. She has quite a large frame - her feet are a size 10 - and I don't think anyone looks good when you can see shoulder bones, etc. And her face is starting to get that sunken look. Like you said, neuronze, go with your gut - and my gut right now says something isn't right. Our pediatrician moved out of our city a year or so ago to another center about 2 hours away. I called there today and we have an appointment on Aug. 5. I have total trust in him and know he will take my concerns very seriously, and if need be, refer her to a specialist. I'm hoping that her weight loss just stops and everything turns out fine, but we will just have to deal with whatever happens. I will keep you posted...thanks!