It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Open to All Other Health Topics Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 08-02-2008, 04:19 AM   #31
drs drs is offline
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: minn.
Posts: 1,409
drs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB User
Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

Just checking in to see how things are going, hopefully you've received your Reiki treatment Elaine and that it's helped. Will stop by again and see how your doing. Diana

 
Old 08-03-2008, 02:23 AM   #32
Senior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 148
Crimson609 HB User
Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

Hi Amanda,
Reading your story did help, it means there is hope. Hope you do manage to get pregnant and cope without the heavy drugs, my heart goes out to you as its something I've contimplated loads of times. Dont' think I've the will power to get through 9 months in agony but what a result if u can. Will be here for you if you ever want to talk about anything, you are one strong minded lady

Hiya Diana,

You can never give too much info, its about you too, if you want to go off on another thread that more appropriate to be able to talk in detail just let me know.
Reiki does help, going to book for an indian head massage with some reflexology with a friend as got a 2 4 1 offer. Wish you were over here as I've got more offers, you could enjoy 1 2.
Had a scare when I was out as mentioned on the other post. was in terrific pain lower rhs pelvic/groin area, i.e. the usual place. Had to take a bunch of pills and oramporh before I could even stand and then I couldn't bend just like you just described but had to shuffle outside. Think scared Dave 2.
My back is a lot better now, love my reiki man to bits for keep sorting me out. Just wish he could sort out this pain too. Have asked for a copy of my mri report so I cab go to the appointment on 12/8 armed with what I think and ideas/questions instead of having the results dropped on me and having to make quick descisions , answers that I don't have time to think about, can't keep affording to go back and forth to him as its £200 a time!
Hope you are having a gd weekend. Take care I also have a lot of problems in the number two area, we could chat two's together if u want lol
Luv 2 u 2

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 08-03-2008, 07:56 AM   #33
drs drs is offline
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: minn.
Posts: 1,409
drs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB User
Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

Sorry you had such a time of it being out and about Scraggy. How awful it must of been. Glad that your Reiki man did some good for you. When compared to you I have no problems!

I hope your foot massage does as much for you as it did for me. Might want to see if you can get a deal after the 12/8 appointment.

Our company just left this morning. I have a few chores to finish up with, womens work is never completely done. Will have to take a nap as we stayed up too late two nights in a row. Will post back here when I get the chance and I'm more with it, right now I'm a bit fuzzy in the head.

 
Old 08-04-2008, 05:18 AM   #34
Senior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 148
Crimson609 HB User
Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

Hi Drs,

Definitely not the case that you've got no problems. Can tell that! Things go in hills and troughs in life, this is a mixed 1 but emotionally much stronger. Getting my head round some of the relationship issues with parents that I had, standing up 4 myself more, trying to be more assertive and say "no", haven't got to no yet but not now is a start. Really not good at sticking up 4 myself but great sticking up 4 other people. Why I can't apply myself the same is interesting, trying to think of myself in the same vein as others. Just a text last night got my heart beating faster and me getting worried. Need to affirm my own personality as a woman rather than a child. Don't want to go into too much detail as you never know who is reading this. Big hugs to you
Scraggy

 
Old 08-04-2008, 05:46 AM   #35
drs drs is offline
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: minn.
Posts: 1,409
drs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB User
Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

I'm trying to figure out your post on asserting yourself with your parents. Sometimes it works better if you say "I just can't do that right now'' as apposed to a "No" for an answer. What that is saying is your taking care of your needs. Especially with what your going through right now, you have to use all of your energy towards getting well, mentally and physically. You just have to. I'm glad you've decided to take the time to learn how to stand up for yourself. Huggs to you, Diana

 
Old 08-06-2008, 08:35 AM   #36
Senior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 148
Crimson609 HB User
Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

Sorry chuck didn't mean to be that vague. Problem is I'm an only child and my mum has the apron strings still tied very tight even though I'm 36. If I don't stay in constant contact she can get very annoyed and expect dad to side with her to the extreme that once, when I went 2 days without talking by text or phone, they both said they would have no more to do with me, I had to go down on bended knee to appologise for doing nothing wrong. Had just moved house, they had been a great help but when I went back to work and didn't contact them they took it that as I didn't need their help anymore and hadn't contacted them they would take offence, big time. I am terrible at saying "no" to any1, you are right though, "not right now" sounds a lot better
I don't want to fall out with them just have a bit more space and not to have to talk about my illnesses all the time, there is more to life after all.
Hope you get the gist of the situation from that, worried about going into more detail, there is a lot more behind the scenes but not something to put on an open forum.
How r u doing anyway, is your shoulder better now or are you still struggling. In absolute awe of the health meds you are taking, don't know any1 in so much control of their own health and who knows so much, you're great and a really special friend.
Sending hugs via the ether xx

 
Old 08-07-2008, 04:35 AM   #37
drs drs is offline
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: minn.
Posts: 1,409
drs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB User
Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

Hey Sweety,
Wish I had a magic wand I'd wave it around and fix all your troubles! It's sad I think when parents cling to the child. All they end up doing is pushing the child farther away. I raised my two to be independent so when they leave home they don't have to depend on us, sure it nice to hear from them but not all the time.
Maybe you could say, 'Listen, I'll call once a week, I need some time to rest and take care of my health and mind, if I'm constantly worried you'll be upset for not calling everyday it just adds to the stress and makes things worse.' Does that sound like something that would work for you to say to them? Or you could add, 'I can't learn to stand on my own two feet if I'm constantly worried what you might think of my choices, I need the time to make decisions on my own, if I just can't decide I'll call and ask for your advise.'

I do know of other grownups that have parents like yours, it's sad in a way that they can't move on, it's like they are living through you. It's disruptive to your life to constantly sooth there ego's all the time. Maybe this is a big part of your ups and downs with your tummy. Are you better at writing it rather than saying it? You can be firm and kind at the same time. You can tell them you appreciate All the nice things they have done,and you need some time to be on your own without checking in. Say, someday you won't be around and that you need to learn how to be independent of them a bit, but you'll call once a week. Boy, wouldn't it be great if that Got That!

I know how smothering it must be, my daughter has a friend that has a mom like yours, constant phone calls about nothing really. (this girl I'm talking about has stomach issues, wonder why!Duh!)She even calls here wondering if I know where her daughter is, she's say's, I buy her a cell phone then she doesn't answer it. Well, come on lady, give your daughter a break, she's almost 20 and has her own apartment! Let her make a few mistakes, let her try to live her own life.
When you make your own decision and it turns out to be a mistake, you can only learn 'more' from those mistakes. You can't trust your own judgment when your constantly worried what your parents might think or say about your choices. Parents don't carry you around when you can walk on your own. That would be pointless, you'd never learn to walk. It would be like your legs were sick, and never develop. You need time to develop and time to actually miss them a little. I hope you can accomplish something with them.
Huggs, Diana

 
Old 08-13-2008, 03:57 AM   #38
drs drs is offline
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: minn.
Posts: 1,409
drs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB User
Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

Hey, Scraggy, I've been awfully busy this last week, how are you? Hope everything is going better for you. With your health and your family.

I went off my diet over the weekend and boy can I tell. Hot flashes are constant and my stomach is a bit on the bloating side. Not fun. I gain 3lbs, now it will take all week to get rid of most of the problem. Oh, well, at least I had some fun. Write back when your able. Huggs, Diana

 
Old 08-16-2008, 08:42 AM   #39
Senior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 148
Crimson609 HB User
Unhappy Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

Sorry for break in post but had to stop while pks took effect in order to continue.
Got the results of the mri on tuesday. They didn't identify any endometriosis present and my bladder looked ok however...
The next bit is an exact quote from a letter I received today from the consultant describing the results " adhesions are present between the mid portion of the distal sigmoid and the posterior fornix and both ovaries adhered in between. Basically indicating fibrosis between the bowel, posterior uterus and including the ovaries. I am anticipating a difficult hysterectomy due to the adhesions and long standing endometriosis. I have made the patient aware of the risk of damage to bowel, bladder or ureters..."
As u can tell by the letter we've reached the conclusion that a hysterectomy is really the only option as the bowel is stuck to alsorts of things and as my ovaries are stuck in between other organs they are also in a mess.
Unless I was going to continue having treatment for endometriosis until menopause occurs naturally which will almost certainly be quite a few years, an option that the consultant is not keen on as I have already been on treatment for so long and the only treatment that seems to work is not licenced for 1 year never mind many and I've already been on it longer than I should. Also the fact that stopping taking the Livial( add back hrt) has eased my symptoms a bit indicates tht my body is not very keen on any form of eostrogen at all.
We have agreed that a hysterectomy is the next step but then the debate is private or on the nhs. We were going to definitely go private as the hospital were offering us a fixed fee arrrangement so that if the surgery took longer, complications arose and I needed to stay in longer or had to come back into hospital within a month of the initial surgery it would have been covered in the original cost. However... The hospital has now changed its mind and decided that the surgery is much too complex for a fixed fee arrangement and that the amount we have been quoted is only a guide. If I need to stay in additional nights the price will increase and no follow up care is covered at all. Niether is the fact that my consultant wants to have a bowel surgeon on standby just incase he is needed. This alone we have been told could necessitate and increase of £500-£2000.
We are now not sure what to do as we can cover the cost initally quoted but taking it on privately when the costs have no limit at all and could spiral up quickly is another issue entirely. Waiting on the nhs would mean that the surgery would have to wait until the week before xmas, great pressie heh! and so I would probably be looking April next year before I would be in any fair state again.
Also the nhs hospital is a womens hospital which also has a labour ward and you often therefore meet women walking round with very new born babies which is obviously something I would prefer to avoid, no disrespect to them, at the time I'm having surgery that completely removes that option from me for good.
The fact that my ovaries are so badly stuck between fibrous tissue will probably, though we haven't asked as yet, mean that saving eggs is a no-no. Its going to take us so long to get out of debt after the procedure just due to the bathroom being done without the additional cost of the surgery that we are going to be financially constrained for quite a few years to come so the huge costs involved in finding a surrogate mother, not counting the increase to the fees in trying to save eggs from the ovaries is not going to be a viable option.
I'm struggling between wanting to get things sorted out as soon as possible and obviously worrying about the cost.Not a good 1. Problems with parents pale into insignificance at minute. They've said they'll give us £5000 which also makes me feel awful for moaning about them. We can't afford not to accept, if we do go private.
In lot of pain with bladder but now wonder if pain from bladder or is it bladder pressing on part of bowel stuck down so if bladders kept empty can't press on it and cause pain. Won't know till the procedure s done, they can look at insides in more detail and I've recovered enough to see the actual pain I'm left with.
Will keep computer left on to kep checking to see if you're going to look back today or not Drs. It's a real difficlt call and I know our ultimate decision but your thoughts would really be appreciated.
A very sore and sorrowful Scraggy

 
Old 08-16-2008, 03:30 PM   #40
drs drs is offline
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: minn.
Posts: 1,409
drs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB User
Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

Well Crap Scraggy,
What depressing news for you, wish I could find where I put that magic wand, I'm afraid that would even help things. What a situation. You have to do something, that's for sure. If there is a blessing in all this, a small one at that, it's that the stuff didn't grow into your bladder, so far anyway, waiting much longer and it may happen there too. I so wish I could be there for you besides just writing, I really feel for you. It's so awful when you have this kind of intensity with pain and then you have to make huge financial decisions on top of it all.

Listen Elaine, you've asked for my input and this is my personal perspective. I am a parent and your parents don't want you to suffer any longer than you have to, if you adopted down the road and your child was suffering, wouldn't you want to help as much as you possibly could, I know there are issues with your parents, but they do love you in there way. Not all parents are perfect, some are better than others at it, but I think they really just want you to get well. Set up a small pay back plan, starting 6mos or so from surgery. This way you have the time to get back on your feet and things are set from the get go with them. But the decision is still ultimately up to you.

I'll say a prayer for you my friend, tears have fallen more than once for you and everything you've been through. I hope you find some peace soon. In all areas of your life. Diana

P.S. Sorry I wasn't able to get back here sooner, I just hooked up the new mouse for the computer the old one was sticking something awful, had to load up some pictures for my brother in law and down load the mouse disc. Up and running again now though. I'll probably check in later tonight, but I'll be gone all day tomorrow. So I'll check in again Monday morning if you haven't replied later tonight. Love ya, Diana

Last edited by drs; 08-16-2008 at 03:38 PM.

 
Old 08-16-2008, 05:33 PM   #41
drs drs is offline
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: minn.
Posts: 1,409
drs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB User
Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

It's getting pretty sad that I'm sleepy at 7:30pm. I eat my evening meal and within an hour I'm tired. If I wake up in the night I'll check back. Like I said we will be leaving early in the morning. Huggs, Diana

 
Old 08-17-2008, 05:31 AM   #42
Senior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: UK
Posts: 148
Crimson609 HB User
Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

Diana,

You may be a long way away but your one of the best friends I've got. You brought a tear to my eye with what you said. Hope you have a good day. I appreciate you keeping in touch with me as often as you do but don't wake yourself up as much as you'd need to to log on in the night, just potter to the loo and then back to bed or whatever u want to do.

Seems that parents are now thinking that I should wait for nhs as 2 risky cost wise to go pte unless can have some cast iron assurances which I'm not going to get about costs rising. Dave and his family are very firmly in the court of get done whatever has to be whatever the cost, we'll find a way to deal with it. I think I'm getting really upset as this is going to g=be 1 of the first and biggest times I've not agreed with my parents, my uncle worked out for my mum exactly how much it would be costing each week for me not being prepared to wait, don't u love relations
I can see they're thinking I've waited this long whats another 4 months in the whole scheme of things but when you've been ill in bed for days because of it it does seem a long time till xmas and I'd love to be celebrating it knowing I'm on the road to recovery not still waiting for them to have to do the procedure.
I've had to go back to having a catheter in due to the pain.
I'm not sure whether I'm being really selfish or whether its normal to want to be out of the pain as soon as possible. As soon as some1 tells u a date when the operation could be done its difficult not to start counting down till then, to then go back to thinking in terms of months not weeks is really hard. Sorry I'm waffling feeling sorry for myself and I'm sure a lot of people would be saying most of us wait for the nhs so why can't you. I don't know what to do but know that if I dither about much more then I'm going to lose 9/9 as well. If that goes back a week my parents will not be pleased as their going away the week after and will feel that I'm ruining their holiday, which I can understand as their minds will be in 2 places at once.

Would really value your opinion, what would u do if u were in my place, pay private and take the gamble about costs or wait for nhs?

Will be glad when daves home today as I'm really low. Will try to post later today or tomorrow.
Scraggy

Last edited by Crimson609; 08-17-2008 at 05:35 AM. Reason: additional info

 
Old 08-17-2008, 04:26 PM   #43
drs drs is offline
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: minn.
Posts: 1,409
drs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB User
Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

Scraggy,

Gosh, don't you wish money tree's were real!

Sorry if I made you tear up a bit, but it's the kind of tears that heal the soul, you know I would do what I could for you, I've been in your situation, maybe not exactly what you have with the endo, but the endless pain, and worry before you find out your diagnosis if you'll make it through the time period before something is done. It NUTS that you have to wait one more dang day. That's my opinion. It's a shame that you've had to wait this long. I'm always in your corner, what ever it is that you need to do to improve your situation, that's my philosophy in life, for myself and others. I feel a heavy chested heart ache for you and for the people that care for you, because WE care what happens to you. Your parents I think got steered to thinking of themselves by someone without true love for their child's welfare.

Is there any way you could ask you parents to pay just what they planned on paying in the first place, then you working something out with the hospital
as that being like a down payment,
maybe if you call the hospital and ask if they would do anything like that?
Or a loan for the rest of what it costs. Is this in any way possible for you and Dave to do?

Do you honestly think you can make it till Christmas like this and that the endometrosis won't be in your bladder if you wait another 4months. The only thing that is maybe keeping it from going into the bladder is that Silkworm enzyme. You got so much growth in there already that I'm sure the enzyme is barely making a difference, but it's possible that it's keeping the new growth to a minimum.

I believe one day you'll be a mother if that is your wish. Always having a goal and believing will keep you working towards that goal and living in the moment. Did Mother Teresa actually have a baby biologically? No, but she was a Mother to many. You don't have to go through the act of child birth to feel like a Mother. If you live in the moment and love as a Mother should, unconditionally, children will gravitate towards you. Because you believe, before it happens. That's the key.

Do not worry yourself about me checking the computer in the middle of the night, lol, with my flashies I have to stay up and wait for them to pass sometimes, plus it's quiet and peaceful sometimes.

Thank God you have Dave, he's sounds like a wonderful supportive person.

Your friend, Diana

Last edited by drs; 08-17-2008 at 04:29 PM.

 
Old 08-18-2008, 03:14 AM   #44
drs drs is offline
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: minn.
Posts: 1,409
drs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB User
Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

I was up at 3:30 this morning, woke up every two hours last night, but managed to get back to sleep after a short period of time. Might even go back to bed this morning.

I found an eye opener of a post on the thyroid board this morning, something about a book on 'stop the thyroid madness. I'm wondering if the synthetic thyroid meds might cause in some people to grow endometriosis. Might be a link to it anyway.

Hope your feeling a bit better today, and I hope you got some rest after all the mind boggling thinking you've had to mull over in the past few days. Huggs, Diana

 
Old 08-20-2008, 05:31 AM   #45
drs drs is offline
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: minn.
Posts: 1,409
drs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB Userdrs HB User
Re: Scared/down as health gets worse and surgery may needed.

Scraggy, did you make your decision on what your going to do yet? Ultimately it is up to you. Prayers and Huggs. Diana

 
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
Scared to start duragesic patch scaredandnpain Pain Management 32 01-01-2007 10:58 PM
HIV convinced- so scared and upset! soo_stressed HIV Prevention 3 06-27-2006 12:48 PM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added








TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



Administrator (48), Titchou (42), quincy (33), janewhite1 (32), JJ (28), ladybud (22), Misty800 (17), feelbad (15), ibake&pray (15), shisslak (14)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1136), MSJayhawk (941), Apollo123 (857), janewhite1 (823), Titchou (773), Gabriel (743), ladybud (667), sammy64 (666), midwest1 (655), BlueSkies14 (610)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 01:33 AM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.com™
Copyright and Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!