Join Date: Jul 2012
Some Kind of Head Problem
Dizziness, memory loss, confusion, general spaciness, and perhaps some ear infections all seem to be sort of related, but by several different ailments. I've been experiencing some of these symptoms for about five years, though some of them I honestly can't remember when the began. I've looked into ADHD, different kinds of ear infections, anxiety, introversion, multiple sclerosis (spelling?) and a couple of other things (once again, I can't remember what they are - I can't always remember my symptoms either). All of them look possible (I'm pretty certain I'm an introvert, anyway), but none of them fit everything. I finally scheduled a doctor's appointment, though it will not be for a couple of weeks. I'm not very good at doctor's appointments because it is extremely difficult for me to recall what I am trying to say.
The main portion of this started very suddenly about five years ago. I was really stressed out by my schoolwork (not that I ever completed any because I avoided it so much), and I got a cold. During the cold I experienced some sort of "brain fog". I don't remember if I had any ear problems at the time, but I was definitely dizzy and having trouble remembering simple things. My family and friends didn't really notice because I'm normally a little bit lost in my own world, and I also pretended to forget things frequently, that I actually remembered rather well. Suddenly, my brain was like a messy house filled with stuffing. I had to wade through the stuffing to get to anything I needed, but I didn't know where the things I needed had gone either.
I also noticed that I would be dizzy. As a child, I had trouble being dizzy for more than a few seconds after spinning in circles. I liked being dizzy, even, because of its rarity and surreal sensation. Now however, there are times when I pick up my head and it feels heavy, and I cannot close my eyes without losing my balance. Sometimes I have nausea, though I can't tell if that is because I am dehydrated or not (which could be a cause for some of these problems as well). I can't lie, being lightheaded is fun, but it is also a bit disruptive. Usually I am only lightheaded when I haven't had enough sleep, but I've also had the issue randomly. However, typically if I have any issues with the weight of my head, it feels more like a lead weight for my neck to hold up.
I have a lot of trouble communicating thoughts as well. I feel somewhat stupid because about halfway through many of my sentences, I forget what I was saying (entirely), and I have to go back to the last thing I remember and work towards the lost thought again. Even by myself, I catch myself standing around, trying to recall what I was doing or thinking, and I quickly forget it again. I have always been a big picture person, but I feel like I remember NO details at all about anything. I used to at least be able to remember most things that I was interested in.
In the past year I've started getting earaches as well. It is always very sharp, and sometimes accompanied by lots of earwax in the affected ear. Some days only one ear hurts and the other is perfectly fine, with no wax buildup. Other days, or even later in the same day, it will switch to the other ear. Some days I have no problems at all. I'm not really sure if it started earlier than the past year, or if it has only been six months etc. Like I said, my memory has gotten really bad.
Exercising and eating healthier foods helps to some degree, and the chiropractor managed to remove some weird "headaches" or pressure going on at the base of my skull, which is great, but I still have the brain fog as bad as ever, and the ear infections are making me wonder. I have tried to relax more as well, though I feel like I'm already functioning at the bare minimum an adult is allowed. I have considered that maybe I have a severe anxiety issue, and the introversion is not working with my current lifestyle, though it just seemed too sudden an onset of issues.
Today I am having particular trouble focusing. It is literally impossible for me to focus on something sometimes. It might be the same as the memory issue. It is also occasionally difficult for me to focus my eyes when I am only a little bit tired (though I won't be able to sleep later. It usually takes me an hour or so to sleep, unless I am very tired). I also cannot always pay attention to what people are saying, though it is much easier to do that than it is to read something someone has written. I also used to be a morning person, though that change could be developed from bad habits.
I have taken to verbal diarrhea as well, because I can only focus on the exact thing on my mind (so if this writing is not very concise and to the point, I apologize, though I am better at writing than speaking). It all seems very trivial and I usually get annoyed with the conversations quickly, because I do not usually like small talk. I do, however, seem much friendlier!
Moreover, this may be completely unconnected, but about six or seven weeks ago, I was diagnosed with a virus relating to mono. It wasn't mono, but I couldn't lift my arm without becoming very tired. We tested for other things like MS, but I didn't ever hear any extra results because I never could contact the doctor again (I have learned that doctors do not call people back. It happened at least three or four times that week).
SO I will leave this as my conclusion before I continue on further rants or remember anything that might be important. The main thing is, I hate not being able to remember things, feeling like my grandmother with multiple sclorosis during conversations because I can't focus, and being afraid of standing on tall things - I love heights, but not when I'm afraid to close my eyes. The earaches, as horrible as they can be, are hardly as annoying in comparison. Clearly I'm a bit stressed. I couldn't even remember my password for this site, though I made the account a couple of hours ago.