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Old 05-19-2005, 09:40 PM   #1
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Question Surgery is NOT an option! Shore? Anyone? HELP!! (long post)

Hey ya'll, I suppose I could post this on the Back Problems board, but I don't know those folks as well as I know you all here. And I may just go ahead and post there also. Never hurts to use all my resources!

Okay, I'm going to try and make this short, cuz, I have a bad habit of posting "books".

I was finally referred to a Neurologist by my new Rheumy. I have FM, CFS, CTS, chronic EBV, Cervical DDD and stenosis, and I have multiple herniated lower lumbar discs, one that has a annular tear. The lower back situation was dx'd by and MRI in Oct '02. The discs seem to be protruding to the right which causes most of my lower back pain and swelling to be on the right side of my spine. So, I was given Lortab, prescribed PT (aqua therapy), I went through 2 sets of ESI's, I was also given some kind of shot to help the butt cheek pain you get. I can't remember what it was exactly but it was shot directly into my upper cheek and it made my whole right leg "noodley" for about an hour. I also did the TENS thing.

Nothing seemed to help. So my PM doc continued on with medication treatment. He mentioned surgery to me only twice and I said, I'd wait. While my GP told me "Avoid surgery for as long as you can." Well, I did that. I waited. For nearly a year now, I have been experiencing loss of function in my right leg. I cannot raise my right leg, unless I pull it up! I also feel pain in the front of my shin which I was told by my PM doc that is from the L-4 and L-5 pressing on a nerve. Well, the loss of use in my right leg progressed so that I can no longer raise my foot toward my shin (bend it upward), I can no longer curl my toes up. I can bend my foot inwards toward my leg by flexing my ankle ONLY if I do it very slowly and it feels funny in my shin when I do that.

So, I have been asking for a new MRI on my lower back to see how much more damage there is and to check out possible surgical options. Well, my Rheumy sends me to this Neurologist (first time I've EVER seen a Neuro) and when he comes in the room, he doesn't know why I'm there! Well, before I was set up for this referral, I had talked to my Rheumy's office about my chronic EBV and some blurred vision, numbing and tingling in my right leg and right side of my face, and that my balance was off. They called me back to set up this referral to the Neuro and mentioned possible MS and threw words around like MRI of the brain, yada yada. Okay, I was under the impression that I would be scheduled for a brain MRI and a lower back MRI from this guy, cuz, the nurse doing the referring told me I would get those MRI's and then I'd carry them to a Neurosurgeon. So I told this to the Neurologist and he said "No, your Rheumy can do all that there since she has an MRI machine on site." So, no MRI on the brain or the lower back. Actually this Neuro doc didn't even discuss the MS issue. The only thing he was interested in was what was written on the referral sheet which was to look at the loss of function in my right leg. Okay, well we wouldn't want to go beyond what's written on the little sheet there would we?

Well, that's fine. So he watches me to the hallway walk with my cane, he does the touch your nose with your eyes closed test. And I have to say, I hit my nose on the second try when I was using my left arm, but when I was holding my right arm out and went to touch my nose, I missed every time. I mean I WAY missed. It was like I didn't know I HAD a nose! LOL Then he did the hammer test on my knees to see how far my legs jumped out. Good on the left side and okay on the right. When he did the ankle reflex, my right side failed, I barely felt it. I actually told him to stop hitting my knees cuz he seemed to be enjoying it too much! He hit each knee about 5 times! That feels weird enough, then it became annoying! LOL Then he did the scrap the bottom of the feet test. I reacted on the left, but didn't react on the right. I felt something running across the bottom of my right foot but didn't react by pulling it away. Then he held my foot and I was to push upward, well I couldn't. I tried and he kept "cheering" me on, but I could NOT raise that foot up while he was applying the slightest pressure. I knew that would happen.

Okay, we're done. He recommended an EMG on my right leg. Please tell me exactly what that is and what are they looking for, someone? He also scheduled an ultrasound for my heart. I've had a heart murmur forEVER and I am one of those who has to take a handfull of anti-biotics before any dental procedure. He said that there are two types of murmurs and that one is considered as a stenosis of the valve. He also said that some heart murmurs are heard in the neck and mine sounded "weak". I was told years ago, when my son was like 7, that one of my valves was staying open a little longer than is usual so it "regergitates" blood out, making it have a "clicking" noise. I used to be a long distance runner, all with this murmur, so I don't think it's going to come to anything, and I had an ultrasound about 6 or 7 years ago and it found nothing. But he seems to think it sounds "weak". Probably from all the stress that doctors cause me! Oh and he also measured my calf muscles and said that it was strange I showed no atrophy. I haven't lost any muscle mass. Well, like I said I was a long distance runner for 10 years and I waited tables for nearly 13 years. I've always had big monster legs, so I figured I'd put 'em to use, so I took up running.

Well, I asked him "what about surgery on my lower back? what about a new MRI on my lower back?" This is the clencher. Drum roll......He said "NO, surgery was NOT an option, that it would not help nor fix the problem." I just looked at him. He told me that since the loss of function in my leg has been going on as long as it has, no chance that surgery will help it. I said to him "you mean I'm going to be like this, with those discs herniated, for the rest of my life!" He just shrugged his shoulders.

When I got home, I called my Rheumy and told them they needed to get something straight, throwing around words like MS and MRI's of the brain to me only to find out, this guy had no interest in that, plus the MRI on my lower back! Then I called my PM doc's office and spoke with his nurse. I have a good relationship with both of them, and my PM doc is not one to give up, so I thought I'd see what he had to say. I spoke with his nurse and said to her "you've been around this stuff for a long time, Ashley, you know my Doc, would he concure? Am I going to have to live with the herniated discs and this pain forever? Is surgery truly not an option for me now?" She sat there for awhile quiet, then finally answered softly, "probably." I said, well, it's my own fault I should have had the darn surgery when I was first diagnosed!

So, what now is my question? How is this possible? Can't they do SOMETHING to those discs? And I want to know WHY I can't have surgery? He didn't tell my exactly WHY? I like to see pictures! Why can't they cut off the part of the disc that is sticking out? If they relieve the pressure on my spinal column, why won't that give me some relief? I never expected total relief, even 10% would be wonderful. There is so much I can't do because of those discs, and my leg. Why can't someone just look at an MRI and see? How can he make that statement without even looking at a new picture of my lower back? Now, I have bursitis so bad in my right hip, it's swollen and feels like a hard mass in there! My GP says I need an MRI of my hip to see about "removing" the bursa! AAAAAAHHHHHHH!

Shore, anyone? Can you give me some answers here? What the heck? How do they stop further nerve damage? Does it get worse, how do they stop it from getting worse before I lose all use of my right leg?

Can someone please tell me why surgery is not an option? Will the nerve continue to be compressed? What is done to stop it? WILL I lose total function in my right leg?

HELP!

Love,
tk
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Last edited by tkgoodspirit; 05-19-2005 at 09:42 PM.

 
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Old 05-20-2005, 07:38 AM   #2
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Re: Surgery is NOT an option! Shore? Anyone? HELP!! (long post)

Tk,

I may be wrong, but I was told that after a nerve has been compressed for so long it "remembers" the pain even when the pressure is relieved. I had the surgery. Same discs as yours. My doc told me if I got 40percent relief from the nerve pain they would consider my surgery a success. He also told me up front that there were no guarantees. I had waited a year and jumped through a million hoops and at least that many tests and procedures. I don't think there is one square inch on my body that has not been probed with a needle or other device. Not only did I not get relief from my surgery but where they took the bone grafts from my left hip, I now have nerve damage there. Ghee, aren't I the lucky one? So now I have nerve damage in both legs. Not to mention the DVT in the right leg.

I hope they can find a way to get you some relief. I'm sorry you are having all this trouble.

God Bless,
Sherry
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Old 05-20-2005, 09:50 AM   #3
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Sherry,

Thank you so so much for your reply. I guess I just never thought I'd hear those words, and I always assumed I could have those discs repaired. I'd be willing to take the chance, but I guess the surgeons aren't, unless I can find one that will. I just want to be able to bend over without needing help to get back up. Or when I DO stand upright, I want to be able to walk without having to wait for my back to "release" and not feel that horribley gripping pain before I can even attempt to take one step. I want to be able to lift a bag of dogfood. I want to go grocery shopping again. I want to go to the mall, hell, I just want to go shoppinig! I want to be able to lie on my back and roll over onto my tummy without struggling and groaning and grabbing something to help roll me over. I can never go to the beach again and simply lie on a towel, unless I had someone there to help me roll over or get up and how glamorous does that look while you are wearing a swim suit! I want to be able to walk further than 50 yards. I miss my walks through the neighborhood. I want to ride a bike again. I want to walk faster than a snails pace. I want to get rid of my cane. I used to garden a lot. We have 1/2 acre and I have many gardens, and I can squat, but I've done that so long my knees get swollen if I squat too long or too often. And I use my knees a lot to bear my weight since I can't bear any weight on my back, so know I need a brace on my right knee cuz I think I've abused the poor knees so badly. I've had a bad right knee since forever. When I was 15 I was getting cortisone shots in that knee.

And that bursitis in my right hip is going to need an MRI, I know it. My GP already told me that. It is most of the reason I use the cane, and why I can't put a lot of pressure on that leg. It hurts so bad and it's swollen right in that "hinge" area of my hip. I can't sit with any weight on it, nor can I lay on the right side, cuz it feels like I'm laying on a rock. I know that they can do surgery on the hip to remove what's causing the bursitis. YUCK. I suppose I need to get that done, before I suffer long term effects from THAT!

Well, Sherry, thanks for your reply. I just like to know WHY when I'm told something. I think I can get that answer from my PM doc, he's pretty good at explaining in detail how things work and how they DON'T, in my case! I don't see him until the end of June tho, cuz he and his PA rotate appts and this month is my turn to see the PA.

I'm sorry for the long post and sorry for the "venting", but I thank you all for allowing me to vent.

Love to all,
tk
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Old 05-20-2005, 10:36 AM   #4
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Re: Surgery is NOT an option! Shore? Anyone? HELP!! (long post)

Hey TK, You know this probably won't be short. First off, why even go to the neuro, if there is a problem he can't fix it, not your heart or your back. So you ned to see a NAS and a cardiologist if you have heart concerns.

There is this theory called the gateway theory, It pretty well accepted and explain things like phantom pain, RSD and many othr chronic pain conditions. YOu mentioned nerve imprinting in your other post and that's a componnt. The theory goes ruffly like this. You stub our tow, signals are sent to your brain through a number of gates :nerve branches" the spina and eventually your brain. Normally the gate opens and closes a stubbed toe will cause the fate to open and cliose as it swells up and becomes more painful, your brain gets the signal and yo experience pain. Eventually that sweeling stops, and the signals deminish and everything goes back to normal except when you catch the toe on the carpet and sheets and you get a few more burst of electic signals through the gates but they normally close like a door after the signal stops.

If you were to par the car on your foot and not pull it out, the messages to your brain would be continually sent keeping the gates open, basiclyy retraining the gates to stay open and be more effecient, the signal of pain is constatnt and millions of pain signals are sent to your brain, IF you leave your foot in there long enough and don''t cause total nerve death, there is a chance that once removed the gates will stay open and continue to send the exact pain signal. With the gates wide open and milions of signals having passed through those nerves, the signal can become engraned in nerve tssue too making your brain think your foot is still under the tire when it's not.

Your brain continues to get the same signal and it's response is to dump endorphins contimously and you start having those dramatic changes in brain chemistry and the perceptin of pain you read about in Dr brookooffs article. The same can happen if post op pain is not treated and the patient sufffers terribly, or in war often care came very late and eventual ampuation removed the injured leg but didn't stop the nuero chemical process of sendng that signal that your in pain.

So the gates stay open even after the problem is corected, They may never close or you may develop RSD where your entre nervous system starts going nuts and you have pain where you never even had an injury an your brain is prodcung so many neuro toxic agents you develop a shingle like condition that an be seen , can't be touched without extreme pain and although RSD or CRPS is still contrversial, you can't argye with what you see in front of you as far as discolerinng, inflamation and the shingle like leasions caused by neurotransmitters that actually cause inflamation of all the nerves in an affected area.

I'm not an RSD expert but my understandng is it follows an injury, that likely wasn't treated properly or the pain managed well.

That's why the neuro and PM are saying it won't do any good to fix things, But they haven't even looked at recent films to determine if the damage may get worse if you don't fix things. You could develop loss of bladerer and bowel control and pain in more areas by not stabalizing things and removing the compresson of the nerve. If the surgery can remove the impingment, that's damaging the nerve and causing the pain, it would at least likely prevent things from getting worse.

There is still a chance that if it hasn't been that long, or your nervous system is resilliant the leg pain will deminish and reflexes will return. If the nerves are damaged they can also regenerate, it takes time but they can measure from L2 to the tip of your big toe and calcualte the time it takes based on repair at x numbers of mm per month. It's not that there is no chance of making things better, and there is certainly something to be gained by preventing further damage but you may not be happy with the outcome of surgery if you don't wake up with all your leg pain relieved.

A surgeons deciding factor may be how he thinks you will handle not having imediate relief and having to work through a hard recovery that will only take time and work on your part to complete the healng process and continued meds t alow this.Mnay surgeon sare anywhere near thye physlosophy of PM docs and that causes problems treating post op pain unlss your PM is going to do that .

So surgery is not out of the question or at least you really don't know that. You may need to see several surgeons, because surgeons screen their patients and a patient they think won't be satisfied with the outcome, likely means continued meds and continued treatment that isn't their specialty and would rather not blemish a great record of surgical success and have another unappy patent that needs meds they aren't comfotable with.

Succes of surgery is measured by docs by corecting abnormalaities, if he starightened yuor spine or reduced an impingement he did his job. Your satisifaction with the surgery doesn't mean he did or didn't do a aproper job, but it's part ego, part drug and DEA and smply not wanting a patient that is going to continue to complain for months or years after the doc has corected the abnortmality, he's done all he can do.

The back surgery may be fairly basic disc surgery, no fusion, no removal of bone, but it may not relieve all your pain and symptoms right away,it may take several months to a year for normal feeling and reflexes to return. But non surgeons shouldn't be making that call and preventing you from getting surgical opinions. Let the surgeon order the CT or MRI, he may want it with contrast and the PM may do it without.

You basically need a good surgeon that you can make understand that your aware you may not wake up with all the nerve pain gone after a decmpression, you won't blame him and you know it may take time for nerves to heal and regenerate or that they may never happen, but you don't want to end up in diapers and would like to at least stabalize the problem so it doesn't cause more damage. This is where PM can be a bad thing if it allows the patient to choose not to have surgery because the big symptom "pain" is being controlled. But loosng function of body parts is starting to look like a pretty big problem. Pain can be managed but you can't replace body parts and there is a risk that the gateways are permananetly opened and that pain signal is engrained into the nerve fiber and may continue to fire sending pain signals and keeping the gates open even after things are stabalized, But although the pain may remain, you could regain your balance, reflexes and fix some of the other problems.

At this point, I would be looking for a NS to do surgery with as minmally invasive technique as you can find. If you can find a doc that does micro discectomies or endoscopic surgry if the bulge is in a position that can be reached without open surgery and clipping the spinous process and removing a chunk of the posteror vertabrea "A Laminaectimy" a Lamnotomy isn't as invasive and is when they drill holes throug the lamina to access the problem. Spine universe is a great site where you can read about all the different methods to corect a problem and all the conditions.

When you talk to a NS make him describe the surgery he plans to do and why he thinks it's better than any other procedure or why he thinks his method is the way to go. Often docs continue to do what they learned and will do lami's on everyone they do disc surgery on because it makes it easy when you open up the posterior side of the vertabrea and remove the spinous process, those hook looking joints that protrude on the back side of the vertabrea and you can feel or see in very thin people. THey are actually joints that interlock and contol the amount of movement in a side to side dirction. A laminectomy completely removes them. Post laminectomy syndrome is excessive movemnt of the vertabrea that can cause nerve irritation and cord impingment and some other problems .That movem,nt also causes scar tissue along with the large open incision to do that kind of disc surgery, It really depends on where the bulge is and what direction it went as to what aproach a doc can take if he's comforatble with sevral different apraches. Find a NS that has done a fellowship in spine surgery.

continued, sorry this is so long

 
Old 05-20-2005, 10:38 AM   #5
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Re: Surgery is NOT an option! Shore? Anyone? HELP!! (long post)

If you have to demand to see a NS and explain you understand you may have waited too long and it may take time for nerve damage to repair, but these nerves do repair themselve. Unlike the spinal cord. If he knows you know what your in for and what to expect and wont be too discouraged if you don't have imediate relief your more likely going to find someone to try and fix things.

If the NS can't find an impingement or a clear cut case of abnormality he can fix or that needs to be fixed, MS could be why you have leg pain, weakness and balance problems, But so can an impinged nerve in the back. Because you haven't seen a doc whose job it is to fix that kind of problem your not getting to a place where you can make an informed decision.

When people are in pain, anything to relieve the pain is a normal response, it's hman nature, and if you were not warned that by masking the pain your odds of fixing a correctable problem decrease the longer you wait someone did a great disservice t you. You may have made a rational decision once the pain was somewhat managed and you can think clear.

Before PM "in the dark voodoo ages of PM", you had to make decision based on can I tolerate the pain or take the chance of surgery, there wasnt' that PM option with relief in the furture. By adding in the abilty to mask the problem it allows the problem to worsen as time passes, and that's not being a respnsable PM doc

. I've seen patients at My clinic get off high doses of meds once they had surgery, one for back problems and one was TMJ that caused daily headahces. They both had great outcomes despite masking the problem and lettting it go uncorected for a year or more, but they reached a point were even the meds couldn't mask the problem if they wanted to remain functional.

So do you take crappy odds of total success, or decent odds to prevent further decline and function and hoe for the best with the leg pain. People with phantom pain can get better, gateways can be closed with drugs like ketamine or other NMDA receptor blockers. It takes a sharp NS and PM doc to get you to your higest level of function and to prevent continued decline and loss. You can continue to try to mask things as you decline in function but you may reach a point where pain reduction is harder and harder to obtain and takes more and more meds.

There is a possible best case sceanrio, you have surgery, you have initial improvement and continue to improve over the first year, your able to do PT and strengthen you body, increase endorphin production which may in turn helps with some of the other problems that you hurt too much to really work on.When that cnstant pain signal does stop., bran chemistry, function and interpretation will return to normal.

If I missed somthing just ask again, But I would be looking for a surgeon to do the diagnstics, the ones he wants and hopfuly corrct and stabalize a problemvif it can be. You can see the deterioration and you don't need an unpleaseant nerve conduction study done by someone that can't fix the problem they find anyway. The NS may order it to see the extent of damage, but the Neuro already has it in his head, your not a good candidate for surgery so a surgeon may never get to see the studies unless you insist.
Sorry it's long and we don't have spell check, but I need to lay down a bit right now.
Take care, Dave

 
Old 05-20-2005, 11:39 AM   #6
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Re: Surgery is NOT an option! Shore? Anyone? HELP!! (long post)

Oh Dave, You dear man. I wasn't even expecting a response from you until tomorrow. Are you using the stealth mode?

My Rheumy referred me to this Neurologist and I was under the impression that he was to order the MRI's on my brain and my lower back, but he was only interested in what was on the referral sheet, which was to look at the loss of function in my right leg. He wouldn't even "go there" as far as the MRI's went, simply told me that my Rheumy could order those MRI's since there was an MRI machine at her facility.

So, yes, I see my Rheumy on Monday and I am going to "nicely request (insist)" that I have the MRI's done. It's my money after all, my brain, my bum leg, my lower back! Then I will ask about a referal to a NS. If I can't get it from my Rheumy, I'm pretty positive I can get it from my PM doc. He has offered before to refer me to a couple NS he knows personally. I DO believe that there is a chance to fix those discs, and even if I get 2% relief, that's better than what I have now, and if I don't try, then I will never know, and I can't do that, it's not like me.

And you know me well, my friend, I DO like to know EXACTLY what is going to be done, I want to see pictures! LOL As far as getting copies of the results of the tests or doctors' notes, I usually request them as I leave the office, and I keep calling until they mail them to me. And I suspect copies of those tests will be sent over to my Rheumy, she'll want them, so will my PM doc. I'll get them one way or another, I usually do. I learned that lesson when SS lost my file!

And I DO realize that even after surgery it may take a long time to heal, but I'm only 46 and to think I have to live like this, with the possiblity of getting worse, makes me nuts! I'm not going anywhere. I would just like the opportunity to possibly have some of my life back. And yes, I have gotten to the point where my meds are needing to be "tweaked" more often. I am currently "tweaking" the Duragesic patch right now. Most likely will go from 50mcg to 75mcg and I'm going to ask about pure Oxycodone for b/t (another suggestion on your part!) because the Methadone, and Hydromorphone haven't worked at all. The only b/t med that did help was Percocet, but I had gotten used to it and was already on the 10mgs. So I did the research and learned that Oxycodone is what Percs have in them only minus the Acetamenaphine. And Oxycodone comes in 15's and 30mgs. So I think that Oxycodone without the acetamenaphine will probably help me, especially since it is available in a higher dose than Percs. So, I'll be seeing my PM's PA at the end of this month. I don't actually see my PM doc until the end of June, since he and his PA rotate month to month. But I will ask the PA if she can get my doc to do a referal to a NS. Sometimes my PM doc is a little difficult to get phone calls returned from.

But I'm not giving up. I may have to wait a couple months, but like I said, I'm not going anywhere. It was good to hear you tell me that I may have an option here, and that it may still be possible to fix those discs and stop the nerve damage from at least getting any worse. THAT is my biggest worry. It getting worse. Plus, I'm so tired of this back pain. Of course having FM, all of these things are "feeding" off each other, causing my FM pain to shoot through the roof!

Thanks again, friend. I appreciate your reply and I know that it takes a lot of energy to reply, and the fact that you did, is an honor I cherish. Get some rest. And I don't mind your typo's at all, I have learned to read past them. And your long posts, well, I have that "long post syndrome" too.

Hugs to you, Dave.
tk
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Old 05-23-2005, 06:17 AM   #7
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Re: Surgery is NOT an option! Shore? Anyone? HELP!! (long post)

Hey TK, just a couple comments here.As far as the nuerologist telling you that surgery is not an option/i would really like to know(as well as you,lol)just what the basis was for his statement.I really would not put much stock into what a neuro says about possible back surgery as he does NOT do them.Getting a second opinion from a good ortho surgeon would really be your best bet.I cannot believe he would make a statement about surgery when he has not even looked inside with at the very least,an MRI.thats just really ignorant you know?Like dave stated, about the permanent nevre damage,he is very much right(as usual),but you never know just how a person will respond when that impinged nerve is released.It all depends on just how much impingement there really is and how much of the actual nerve has died.like dave stated,while having surgery might not bring you great relief, you really need to be the most concerned about possible progression of symptoms at some point and the impact this could have if it is left to continue without some sort of intervention.the loss of bowel and bladder control are a very very real possibility if this is allowed to continue.It sucks bigtime too.I have been 'blessed" with both due to my spinal cord surgery and the damage it left behind.

A lami could really help release the pressure on the nerve or nerves.it really helped an impinged nerve that i had in my C 7 nerve root when I had the backs of three vertebrae in my c and t spine removed so my NS could access my actual spinal cord for surgery.I was having some very intense pain that we knew was coming from the nerve impingement in the c 7,which actually happened after they placed a plate and screws on my c 6-7,after a failed fusion.It would have involved a whole nother surgery and the removal of the hardware to try and fix so this was kind of left on the back burner while i was tackling the cavernoma issues.but much to my suprise,after the initial post op pain started to subside, i noticed that all of the pain and other symptoms that I had had from the nerve impingement were like gone after that surgery.But unfortunetly, because of the extensive damage from the spinal cord surgery, a bunch of other nightmare crap was left in it's place.(it's always somethin,ya know??)

you really do need to see another doc(ortho) and definitely get that MRI so you can actually see what it is that you are dealing with.that neuro you saw really was not doing you any favors.considering the fact that this guy does not even do surgery, for him to tell you that it is innoperable was kind of stupid.As far as the EMG?That is a good idea as it will tell you if there is more permanent damage to any of the nerves in the leg.it only will show definite permanent damge and whether or not there is any electrical activity,not intermittant impingement.it will also help pinpoint the exact area of the worst problems.

i hope you get some answers soon Tk.i know you are dealing with multiple issues here and i can sooo relate to that,lol.let us know how things are going.marcia
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Old 05-23-2005, 09:36 AM   #8
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sherry47 HB User
Re: Surgery is NOT an option! Shore? Anyone? HELP!! (long post)

TK,

Your post really touched me. I could have written that myself. I would love to do all those things again also. It is so frustrating to be in pain and not be able to participate in your own life. Being confined to a recliner or bed is not how I pictured my thirty something's. I have always loved to take my children swimming during the summer. (I worked for the school system for 14 years so I was home with them during the summer.) If we weren't at the club swimming, then we packed a couple sodas and some sammies and went to the lake for the day. My minivan would be full of children. The kids would haul everything down to the beach for me. I have already told my children that we won't be going to the lake that often this year and we can't afford the club anymore. The club is only like a mile from our home so on the bad days I would take them there. They liked the lake better because it has a sandy beach area and also the shaded picnic areas. The lake also has a kiddy area and a diving board area. It's pretty unusual for a lake. But I digress. I just wanted to let you know that I know exactly how you feel. It's hard having to feel and KNOW that you are basically worthless. I also have flower, vegetable, and herb gardens. My oregano and Rosemary are going crazy out there. LOL. My chives and sage are in full bloom and I have rose bushes blooming like crazy, but they all need some serious attention right now. I have over 30 different varieties of roses. They need to be sprayed for black spot right now but I am not able to do it. It's also time for fertilizing but again, not able. Yesterday my baby told his dad that he needed to bring my wrought iron lawn set back so "mommy" could sit outside with her flowers. Believe it or not but when he brought the kids home last night, he also brought the furniture. I think it was sort of a peace offering. LOL. I want to one day be able to do some of the small things at least. I have been pushing myself more lately. My husband gave me a miniature dachshund around Valentines Day and she has forced me to at least get in some walking. She has also helped tremendously with the depression I had been battling. She gave me a reason to get out of this recliner and go outside. My mom was upset at first about him buying me the dog but since she has seen how much Princess Gigi has helped me. Now mom says Princess is a lifesaver. I already knew that.

Please know that you are not alone. Feel free to vent anytime you wish. I will "listen".

Oh yeah, about the way we look in our bathing suits struggling to try to get up and down, I wear a bikini so that really doesn't make a pretty picture. LOL. If you can wear a bikini, you should be able to get up and down by yourself. However, I have never had a problem with having someone there to help.

God Bless,
Sherry
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Spinal Fusion with cages, Cluster Headaches, Depression, Arthritis, Adhesions, Alt. Digestive Tract

Last edited by sherry47; 05-23-2005 at 09:42 AM.

 
Old 05-23-2005, 05:31 PM   #9
Senior Veteran
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Join Date: Jan 2004
Posts: 1,021
tkgoodspirit HB Usertkgoodspirit HB User
Re: Surgery is NOT an option! Shore? Anyone? HELP!! (long post)

Hey,

Thanks EVERYONE for your replies. I fully intend of getting an MRI of my lower back from SOMEONE. I see my Rheumy tomorrow and will ask her, since they have an MRI machine right there in her facility. She already told me, she doesn't read them tho. Huh? My PM doc reads them! If she won't order it, I KNOW my PM doc will. I see him on the 31st of this month.

I agree, I don't know HOW a doctor can possibley say that surgery is not possible if he hasn't even looked at what's going on in my lower back. I also have been told by my GP to have an MRI on my right hip. He dx'd bursitis, but he seems to think a better look would be a good idea. My whole right hip hurts, I can't even allow any pressure on it. I have to drive sitting side ways. Now THERE'S a trick! So, I don't even really know for sure where the nerve is being pinched! I will mention my hip to the technician doing the EMG.

Another thing that tells me, this Neurologist could care less....Get this! I have my EMG scheduled for June 1st (they are doing my heart ultrasound the same day). So the EMG is on June 1st, but I don't see the Neurologist until JULY SIXTH! So, more than a month after the EMG and Ultrasound is done, I will see the Neurologist who ordered the test!

I'm betting I have an MRI and an appt with NS before I see the Neurologist! That's my plan, anyway. That way, I can stick it in his face! LOL

Again, guys, thanks!
tk
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"We must be the change we wish to see in the world"
Mahatma Gandhi

 
Old 05-23-2005, 10:57 PM   #10
Senior Veteran
(female)
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: WA, USA
Posts: 897
trowftd3 HB User
Re: Surgery is NOT an option! Shore? Anyone? HELP!! (long post)

First of all, TK, Good luck. It seems as if you are on the right path with this. You know what needs to be done and who seems like they are going to help you. Stick with it and don't give up and don't let them push you around.


Next....Sherry, I'm sorry to be nosey but....are you and your hubby still together? It's sooo hard to get some things when you're just reading a message...know what I mean?

Quote:
Originally Posted by sgibson

Yesterday my baby told his dad that he needed to bring my wrought iron lawn set back so "mommy" could sit outside with her flowers. Believe it or not but when he brought the kids home last night, he also brought the furniture. I think it was sort of a peace offering.
Cp does put a strain on even the best relationships. My husband and I have certainly had our moments lately....just last night we had it out about the housework....we both have pain issues! I hope you and your hubby are just going through the normal stuff. Again, sorry to be sticking my nose in and please tell me to bug off if I'm being a pain. Best wishes to both of you.~Mush

 
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